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  • Featured on the home page on Sep 20th 2011
  • Post Of The Day on Oct 2nd 2011

Agreed

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Why do prostitutes charge per hour? I mean, what are we supposed to do for the other 57 minutes? amirite?

Top Comment

Play table tennis. Bitches love table tennis.

+8990126 See / Add Replies

Anonymous

Comments

you speak for yourself there kid

-3911504 Reply

Supermannn Supermannn

In response to “you speak for yourself there kid

...That's the joke...

+36437 Reply

BrianH BrianH OP

In response to “...That's the joke...

yeah, it is a joke. you're like 12(therefore not expected to have any endurance, and I'm 20 and can go for an hour :P)

-6412766 Reply

Supermannn Supermannn

In response to “yeah, it is a joke. you're like 12(therefore...

My mom said you busted inside her in 2 minutes. Quit lying

0 Reply

Anonymous

In response to “My mom said you busted inside her in 2...

I can't wait until you're banned.

0 Reply

LinksLegionaire LinksLegionaire

In response to “yeah, it is a joke. you're like 12(therefore...

Dude... an hour? Sheesh. I'd get bored. I'd start making a grocery list in my head. And it starts to hurt after a while, but I think that's just me.

+475141 Reply

Frank_n_Furter Frank_n_Furter

In response to “yeah, it is a joke. you're like 12(therefore...

A whole hour? You're my hero, sir. Teach me how to slay vag like you do.

+484917 Reply

Anonymous

In response to “yeah, it is a joke. you're like 12(therefore...

An hour...? Maybe you should put a bag over her head next time. Or perhaps her entire body.

+20201 Reply

StealthApple StealthApple

In response to “yeah, it is a joke. you're like 12(therefore...

Age has nothing to do with it. When you're spending 58 minutes of that hour trying to find the right hole, I don't think you can really brag.

+6465111 Reply

Sinner

In response to “yeah, it is a joke. you're like 12(therefore...

Haha 20 year olds aren't much better than 17 year olds!

+6711 Reply

Anonymous

In response to “yeah, it is a joke. you're like 12(therefore...

... hate to break it to you mr. tebow but uh..aren't you abstinent?

0 Reply

anniebananie92 anniebananie92

Ok, some some guy goes to a really high-class prostitute, and goes "What can I get for $20?" and she looks at him and sneers and goes "That'll get you about 30 seconds" and the guy goes "Great, that's just enough!"

+818434 Reply

Anonymous

In response to “Ok, some some guy goes to a really high-class...

At least someone gets the joke. Sagashhdjshsjdn you put a picture up.

01111 Reply

BrianH BrianH OP

In response to “At least someone gets the joke...

It's not a pic of me, it's of Robert De Niro in Taxi Driver, but when he was young and good looking.

+8113 Reply

Anonymous

In response to “It's not a pic of me, it's of Robert De Niro...

Slightly less awesome, but it's a picture. I always used to wonder what you and DanielJames looked like. I pictured him as Phill from Phill of the Future for some reason...(wary)

+18213 Reply

BrianH BrianH OP

In response to “Slightly less awesome, but it's a picture. I...

I always imagined him as looking super nerdy, and this gonna sound weird, but I kinda thought he was a bit ethnic for a while - like, part Indian or something.

+9123 Reply

Anonymous

In response to “I always imagined him as looking super nerdy...

You aren't the only one thought I was mixed race.
I thought my pale hand made my race pretty obvious...

+11165 Reply

DanielJames DanielJames

In response to “You aren't the only one thought I was mixed...

I used to think you were black. I think in the small picture your dark hair looks like it could be your forehead.

+11 Reply

Mary Mary

In response to “It's not a pic of me, it's of Robert De Niro...

Even though that's not you, that's still how I imagine you. And it actually makes everything you say even more entertaining.

+12164 Reply

Sobriquet Sobriquet

It's funny because you're 15. (hehe)

+30355 Reply

Sobriquet Sobriquet

In response to “It's funny because you're 15. (hehe)

At least it's funny :)

+1515 Reply

BrianH BrianH OP

mario kart

+232526 Reply

Anonymous

In response to “mario kart

You have to specify if it was Peach, or the hooker you were screaming "cheating ****" to, though.

+11143 Reply

Serg Serg

In response to “mario kart

That's EXACTLY what I thought. Or make a **** Mountain in a blanket fort

-235 Reply

swimlax swimlax

Talk about your feelings.

+525647 Reply

PurpleZebra PurpleZebra

I don't really get it. Is it because guys **** quickly?

-2525 Reply

DDasia DDasia

In response to “I don't really get it. Is it because guys...

No, it's because there's a subculture of prostitutes who will, in addition to sexual favors, come into your house and kill large spiders for you if you're too scared to do it yourself, and even if they scuttle around and make themselves hard to kill it only takes three minutes, max.

+116117126 Reply

FlyingGuineaPig FlyingGuineaPig

In response to “No, it's because there's a subculture of...

Ya' know, you're so humerous, that's was SO funny, LO-****-L!

-393422 Reply

DDasia DDasia

In response to “Ya' know, you're so humerous, that's was SO...

Oh.. that's what that noise was.

+27281 Reply

Anonymous

In response to “Ya' know, you're so humerous, that's was SO...

The point is that sex usually doesn't take an hour, unless you're like Mr.hippie_slay up there.

There, I just saved you like half an hour of sounding like an idiot.

+282911 Reply

lonely_jew lonely_jew

In response to “The point is that sex usually doesn't take an...

If the guy drinks alcohol he can last an hour but thanks

-20222 Reply

DDasia DDasia

In response to “If the guy drinks alcohol he can last an hour...

That's whiskey **** for ya

+572 Reply

Anonymous

In response to “Ya' know, you're so humerous, that's was SO...

Although I assume that was sarcasm, I've decided to Love your comment and add it to my collection of comments that say good things about me because it will probably irritate you. So thank you. It's great to be appreciated.

+26261 Reply

FlyingGuineaPig FlyingGuineaPig

In response to “Although I assume that was sarcasm, I've...

I'm giving you the look!

-18422 Reply

DDasia DDasia

In response to “Although I assume that was sarcasm, I've...

Dear Flying Guinea Pig,

You are quite possibly the funniest amiriter I've ever met in my whole life.
You understand when things need to be lifted a little in spirits, so you make hilariously witty jokes. Also, you understand when things should NOT be lifted in spirits (but you make jokes about those moments anyway).

I will love you forever and ever amen.
Marry me?

+5612 Reply

Flying Hampster

I hate it when you get called quick on the draw. I thought all girls wanted was three pumps and a "I'm sorry."

+2020 Reply

Anonymous

Play tic-tac-toe on her stomach.

+22222 Reply

Serg Serg

Demand a refund from the prostitute, and then cry to yourself when she says no.

+222312 Reply

HakunaMatata HakunaMatata

In response to “Demand a refund from the prostitute, and then...

or you could be like Vince and beat the out of her.

+484 Reply

stepdom

In response to “or you could be like Vince and beat the out...

that is horrible.

0 Reply

Anonymous

In response to “that is horrible.

Well I think she bite his tongue first.

-11 Reply

stepdom

Anonymous

Play table tennis. Bitches love table tennis.

+8990126 Reply

Anonymous

Get tested.

+2626 Reply

Anonymous

YOU'RE DOING IT WRONG

+44 Reply

Favvkes Favvkes

In response to “YOU'RE DOING IT WRONG

... Or are you? (hello)

+99 Reply

Anonymous

We're still young, get it up again boy!

+2121 Reply

StealthApple StealthApple

How do you make a hormone?
Just don't pay her.

+212323 Reply

Kashish Kashish

8===D 

That ^

+14141 Reply

Velociraptor Velociraptor

Cry and say "I'm sorry, I'm not usually that quick, it's just been a long time and you're so pretty!"

+17192 Reply

Anonymous

You have a conversation.

+10111 Reply

Sexy Sexy

Propose.

+46461 Reply

KirstenAnn KirstenAnn

Uhhhh, whattttttt????????????????????????????????!!!!!!!!!!!????????
I am 12 and wut is this lol :/

-23326 Reply

Anonymous

In response to “Uhhhh...

Obvious troll is obvious.
You're not funny.
You overdid it so much that it's just too noticeable

+27281 Reply

Rainboots Rainboots

In response to “Uhhhh...

Twelve year olds know...

+12131 Reply

heythereilikeurhair heythereilikeurhair

I'd do something fun with them.
Maybe I would cry as I tell her about my painful divorce, then ask her to go out with me.
Or maybe I would give her a speech on how prostitution is wrong and she should turn to God.
The possibilities are endless.

+333521 Reply

Anonymous

In response to “I'd do something fun with them. Maybe I would...

inb5 "But you ARE God LOL"

+31343 Reply

Anonymous

In response to “inb5 "But you ARE God LOL"

Shut up

-13417 Reply

Anonymous

In response to “Shut up

Am I somehow annoying you?

+8113 Reply

Anonymous

In response to “Am I somehow annoying you?

No

-13215 Reply

Anonymous

In response to “No

Then why tell me to shut up?

+781 Reply

Anonymous

In response to “Then why tell me to shut up?

Because I can

-12113 Reply

Anonymous

In response to “Because I can

Aren't you the guy who made the "but chopsticks aren't a fork" comment?

+1616 Reply

Anonymous

In response to “Because I can

Actually, no you CAN'T. In case you didn't notice, He's GOD.

+11 Reply

theatrebug

In response to “Actually, no you CAN'T. In case you didn't...

I think I just did though

0 Reply

Anonymous

In response to “I think I just did though

Not with 12+ thumbs downs, you can't...

+11 Reply

theatrebug

In response to “Not with 12+ thumbs downs, you can't...

Still did
Cry about it

-11 Reply

Anonymous

In response to “Am I somehow annoying you?

Just shut up

-10313 Reply

Anonymous

In response to “Just shut up

Are you always a douche, or is it just on Saturday nights/Sunday mornings?

+18191 Reply

Anonymous

In response to “Are you always a douche, or is it just on...

your god, shouldn't you already know that, or is that rhetorical?

+341 Reply

alittleannoyed alittleannoyed

What's a prostitute?

-617 Reply

sutton-emily

In response to “http://amirite.net/user/ActionMan

So you, in addition to sexual favors, will come into my house and kill large spiders for me if I'm too scared to do it myself, and even if they scuttle around and make themselves hard to kill it will only takes three minutes?

+221 Reply

Sun Sun

In response to “So you, in addition to sexual favors, will...

I believe that falls under my job description.

+22 Reply

Anonymous

I eject upon entry.

+1111 Reply

Anonymous

3 minutes?? Oh, you're animal!!

022 Reply

JustSayin JustSayin

In response to “3 minutes?? Oh, you're animal!!

I am animal?

+66 Reply

BrianH BrianH OP

In response to “I am animal?

I can haz cheezburger?

+451 Reply

Anonymous

In response to “I am animal?

Yea man. You can last a whole 3 minutes?? Impressive

-11 Reply

JustSayin JustSayin

3 minutes? more like 3 seconds.

+22 Reply

alittleannoyed alittleannoyed

Why is this POTD? (hmm) Maybe Amirite is broken and it's selecting random posts for POTD? That's just my guess, though :P

-527 Reply

Anonymous

Anonymous

In response to “(troll)

(troll)

+11 Reply

Anonymous

In response to “(troll)

(troll)

+11 Reply

Anonymous

Convert her

022 Reply

Paigachu Paigachu

How the heck did this get POTD??
Seriously...

-22 Reply

PoohBear0011

In response to “How the heck did this get POTD?? Seriously...

Well you see, either Anthony or an admin made it POTD. I think Chromana is the only admin (hmm)

+44 Reply

BrianH BrianH OP

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