+543 My girlfriend is pregnant and we never had sex. It's not outrageous for me to accuse her of cheating. amirite?

by Anonymous 12 years ago

This reminds me of an episode of The Freah Prince. Carlton's ex came back out of no where claiming she was pregnant, but Carlton excepted the child as his even though he had never had sex.

by Anonymous 12 years ago

I remember that. It's not as funny now:/

by Anonymous 12 years ago

Why not?

by Anonymous 12 years ago

Lolololol is that a serious question?

by Anonymous 12 years ago

Um no wary Lol kidding that was serious the post is still funny and the episode was kinda funny. At the end he admitted he wa still a virgin so they kicked her out.

by Anonymous 12 years ago

If I recall correctly, Carlton knew for a fact the child wasn't his, but he wanted it to be so he played along. It was more heartbreaking if anything. OP, I hope you're not too broken up, you truly got the better half of the deal.

by Anonymous 12 years ago

Yes, of course he knew, but his family didn't know it was a scam. Scamming bitches gonna scam :/

by Anonymous 12 years ago

Nah. I mean it really got me at first but there is nothing I can do about it so whatever. HONEY BADGER DON'T GIVE A SHIT! Why should I?

by Anonymous 12 years ago

Anf hey. If anything I got a post in the home page out of it! Silver linings lol

by Anonymous 12 years ago

MARY

by Anonymous 12 years ago

Hahahahahaha!!!

by Anonymous 12 years ago

Bitches ain't shit but hoes and tricks.

by Anonymous 12 years ago

Aliens. They're the only explanation.

by Anonymous 12 years ago

Hahaha that's better than her "it was your finger" theory.

by Anonymous 12 years ago

Clearly you have a newly discovered ability to move your sperm all the way up your body and into your finger. What happened, did it come out of your nail? I hate it when that happens. :/

by Anonymous 12 years ago

This happened in real life?! THE FUCK!! O_O

by Anonymous 12 years ago

Yea. Bitches gonna be bitches I guess :P

by Anonymous 12 years ago

Smmfh

by Anonymous 12 years ago

Christmas is coming. I sense the second coming is too... or she's just a cheating slut. but ya know... 6 to one, half dozen to another...

by Anonymous 12 years ago

Nah. Just a cheating slut.

by Anonymous 12 years ago

I would double-check, just to make sure you know she isn't immaculate.

by Anonymous 12 years ago

I'd seriously be getting a paternity test.

by Anonymous 12 years ago

Oh I know for a fact it wasn't me. We haven't done anything in 2 months and she's 5 weeks in. There's no need.

by Anonymous 12 years ago

Ah, and she's still claiming it's still yours? How insanely dumb is she?

by Anonymous 12 years ago

Not dumb, just desperate.

by Anonymous 12 years ago

I think she doesn't want to look like a whore. Ummm. You've got one in the oven that's not helping out your cause.

by Anonymous 12 years ago

Did you do anal? Because it's possible for the santorum to leak into the vagina after anal sex, causing a baby.

by Anonymous 12 years ago

No. Lol. But like I said to some one else we haven't done Anything fr 2 months and she's 5 weeks pregnant. And I'm no Asian but that doesn't add up.

by Anonymous 12 years ago

The "I'm no Asian" part made me LTMS. But yeah, that definitely does suck. If she were to keep the baby, would you want to be a part of the baby's life, out of curiosity?

by Anonymous 12 years ago

I want to be out of her life. So no. I don't need an extra tie to her. And as of right now it's going up for adoption.

by Anonymous 12 years ago

That's probably for the best. If parents aren't able to take care of their children (financially), then putting the child up for adoption is probably the best course of action. Give it to somebody who's financially able to take care of the child.

by Anonymous 12 years ago

Not only financially but just someone who truly wants one too. A nice gay couple or something idk.

by Anonymous 12 years ago

Damn, sucks to be you. I hope you and kid will be alright!

by Anonymous 12 years ago

Thanks.

by Anonymous 12 years ago

Why not try abortion?

by Anonymous 12 years ago

That's her choice. Not my kid. I'd say it's cuz she's religious but that didn't stop her from getting pregnant at 17 now did it......dumb bitch

by Anonymous 12 years ago

hehehe santorum...

by Anonymous 12 years ago

Jesus 2.0

by Anonymous 12 years ago

Ahahaha. I wouldn't even want Jesus as a son. He'd show me up.

by Anonymous 12 years ago

It depends on how psycho she is, if you masturbated or something by her, she could insert it in her in hopes of getting pregnant (unfortunately I've seen it done). If it's 100% absolutely impossible that it's yours, thank your lucky stars you found and how crazy this chick is before actually having a child with her.

by Anonymous 12 years ago

Damn. I didn't even think about that!! Lol. Now I'm almost glad this happened.

by Anonymous 12 years ago

http://abcnews.go.com/Health/surprise-twins-man-sues-fertility-clinic/story?id=15015147

by Anonymous 12 years ago

Lol. God I hope not. I don't even know how the would happen.

by Anonymous 12 years ago

Or how it could happen

by Anonymous 12 years ago

That completely sucks! O.O But rather like this than there being a possibility that you're the father and finding out years later that that's not the case.

by Anonymous 12 years ago

So right. Damn I can't even pay for myself right now. A kid is the last thing I need.

by Anonymous 12 years ago

Also. Your name is awesome.

by Anonymous 12 years ago

I seriously want to thank all of you. I was in such a bad mood when I posted this. Thanks for being awesome amirite community.

by Anonymous 12 years ago

It'd be outrageous if you didn't accuse her of cheating....unless of course, you mind fucked her, in which case you have no right to accuse her of anything.

by Anonymous 12 years ago

I was going to comment, but everyone already said wjhat I was gonna say. So I'll just throw this out there: 'Mmmmhmmm!' (:

by Anonymous 12 years ago

http://m.9gag.com/gag/900028 Funny this post reminded me of this.

by Anonymous 12 years ago

Looking At that URL I don't want to go.....

by Anonymous 12 years ago

It's funny really. I promise it's nothing bad.

by Anonymous 12 years ago

That was genuinely funny. Is that entire site just rage comics?

by Anonymous 12 years ago

Yeah pretty much...And Memes, stuff like that.

by Anonymous 12 years ago