+361 It would be crazy if Facebook automatically updated statuses to what you are actually doing. Like "John Smith is masturbating alone in his room" or "Kelly McDonald just bought tampons.", amirite?

by Anonymous 12 years ago

That'd be so awkward.

by Anonymous 12 years ago

John Smith is masturbating to Hannah Jane's status about masturbating.

by Anonymous 12 years ago

Facebook timeline would be even worse, imagine reading "John Smith is masturbating alone in his room" 365 times in a row

by Anonymous 12 years ago

"John Smith is breathing in. John Smith is breathing out." X 15,000

by Anonymous 12 years ago

Add in the blinks and heartbeats.

by Anonymous 12 years ago

"PowerSerg is crying himself to sleep because he misses his ex-girlfriend so much", every day. Come on, Sergei, it's been two years, man.

by Anonymous 12 years ago

More like "John Smith just realized he was the doctor"

by Anonymous 12 years ago

*"Kenny McDonald just bought tampons." "They were for my girlfriend, man!"

by Anonymous 12 years ago

masturbating alone? what other kind of masturbation is there?

by Anonymous 12 years ago