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Agreed

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Disagreed

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superkeeliFanaticSkr3wBallSuzywao
Having internet crushes proves that our generation can look beyond physical appearances and actually fall for a person's personality, amirite?

Top Comment

You can't look beyond something that isn't even there. People don't look past physical appearances online, they just don't think of them because they can't see them. I guarantee you that at least 85% of these relationships would not work if they had met in real life because looks would make too much of an impression for the relationship to go smoothly.

+14195 See / Add Replies

ctiscooler ctiscooler

Comments

You can't look beyond something that isn't even there. People don't look past physical appearances online, they just don't think of them because they can't see them. I guarantee you that at least 85% of these relationships would not work if they had met in real life because looks would make too much of an impression for the relationship to go smoothly.

+14195 Reply

ctiscooler ctiscooler

In response to “You can't look beyond something that isn't...

I don't know about that. I had fallen for a friend of mine online, and had those feelings for two years before we ever met. Nothing changed once we did, and it turned into a four year relationship and engagement.

+16171 Reply

Suzywao Suzywao

In response to “I don't know about that. I had fallen for a...

But did you end up liking the way they looked as soon as you saw them?

+11 Reply

Anonymous

In response to “But did you end up liking the way they looked...

I'm impressed by your using a gender neutral pronoun, and yes when I met him in person I was smitten. Though at that point we had already been sharing pictures and speaking with one another with webcams.

+1717 Reply

Suzywao Suzywao

In response to “I'm impressed by your using a gender neutral...

Oh thanks:) You gave no indication of a pronoun in your comment so I decided to go with they/them.

But the fact that you still each liked the way you both looked and had known how you looked prior to meeting doesn't invalidate ctiscooler's point. If anything, it supports it because they said that looks matter and a purely personality based relationship might be disappointed if the couple found each other unattractive physically.

+1313 Reply

Anonymous

In response to “Oh thanks:) You gave no indication of a...

I understand your point as well as the point of the original comment (I agree with the first half whole heartedly) but the FIRST time I saw his picture, no, I didn't think he was incredibly attractive. In his defense we were both much younger and more awkward looking than when we first met. I guess I can never know if I found him attractive because of his actual physical looks, or because I was just seeing who I knew him to be on the inside. I would sincerely postulate that it was at least mostly the latter.

+671 Reply

Suzywao Suzywao

In response to “I understand your point as well as the point...

Alright, that's nice to hear:) I think that looks matter to an extent, but people can look past them if the person is right. I believe though that a lot of internet relationships won't survive, but not necessarily because of looks.

+33 Reply

Anonymous

In response to “Alright, that's nice to hear:) I think that...

Well a lot of relationships in general won't survive, for plenty of reasons.But my interpretation of the post was that in an online relationship, looks become irrelevent. If I had met him in person before we started talking, his looks may have changed how our relationship evolved. But the fact is that the first time I really saw what he looked like (more than one grainy picture) I was already in love. So he could have been someone I would have normally considered hideous, but I may not have cared or even noticed.

+77 Reply

Suzywao Suzywao

In response to “Well a lot of relationships in general won't...

I completely see where you're coming from. Honestly, I find that when I really like a person's personality their looks just become better to me. And talking to them online is kind of like the same effect as being friends with a person first before actually falling in love. It just gives you a way to get to know the person without bias.

+771 Reply

Anonymous

In response to “Well a lot of relationships in general won't...

Excuse me for being nosy, but how did you two meet? I know lots of people have met over the Internet but I neve understood how without some dating site.

+11 Reply

itube itube

In response to “Excuse me for being nosy, but how did you two...

We met on Diablo 2, a game we used to play. We were very young and didn't meet in person for another five years or so after that.

You don't have to apologize for being nosy; I'm the one volunteering personal information. :P

+77 Reply

Suzywao Suzywao

In response to “Excuse me for being nosy, but how did you two...

I was in a similar situation to Suzywao, where I met a guy online (in a chat room) and we fell in love and then met up and ended up having a 4 year relationship and even though it didn't work out we still are friends. To be honest he wasn't the most attractive person I had seen, but I feel in love with his personality so that made him more attractive to me and when he first saw what I looked like he said "yeah you look alright but you're too skinny" so I apparently wasn't the most attractive person to him either.

+441 Reply

SpearmintMilk SpearmintMilk

In response to “I was in a similar situation to Suzywao...

Did his opinion of your weight have any impact on your self image?

0 Reply

Hullabaloo Hullabaloo

In response to “Did his opinion of your weight have any...

I still remember it all these years later so it must have lol. I was already self conscious though and he wasn't the first person to say something like that.

+11 Reply

SpearmintMilk SpearmintMilk

In response to “I still remember it all these years later so...

That is rather unfortunate. I mean, it's not like you can control that kind of thing without the risk of overdoing it. People tend to make thoughtless comments without realising the possible negative implications.

0 Reply

Hullabaloo Hullabaloo

In response to “That is rather unfortunate. I mean, it's not...

Definitely. I really don't think he meant to be mean or hurt my feelings, and if I had been less self conscious I probably wouldn't have even cared. I think everyone says things that impact on others without realising it though, positively and negatively.

+11 Reply

SpearmintMilk SpearmintMilk

In response to “I don't know about that. I had fallen for a...

That was bad wording on my part. I meant if they had first met in person.

+11 Reply

ctiscooler ctiscooler

In response to “That was bad wording on my part. I meant if...

Oh! Well I apologize for my six paragraph non sequitur rant then. :)

+22 Reply

Suzywao Suzywao

I have more internet crushes than anyone on the planet... but I must say I do like to see a beautiful face match the personality.

+44 Reply

Skr3wBall Skr3wBall

Yeah, but I always imagine them as being attractive.

+9101 Reply

Ram27 Ram27

Hope has been slightly restored.

Any girl in the right mind won't date me for my looks. *posts as anonymous to avoid accusations about attention whoring*

+7811 Reply

Anonymous

In response to “Hope has been slightly restored. Any girl...

nah im sure youre not that bad

+33 Reply

meemer147

In response to “Hope has been slightly restored. Any girl...

I agree with the other comment. You probably aren't as bad as you think. I've found that a lot of people that think they look really bad really don't (and a lot of them look pretty good or at least normal). It's really about perspective.

+55 Reply

Anonymous

In response to “I agree with the other comment. You probably...

Everyone says that, but girls only date me when they're desperate.

Looks like more foreveralone.jpg time for me.

0 Reply

Big_Boss Big_Boss

In response to “Everyone says that, but girls only date me...

Well then, those are obviously not the right girls for you.

And besides, your profile pic indicates that you are a very cute pony!

+331 Reply

Anonymous

In response to “Well then, those are obviously not the right...

****, I forgot to press anonymous lul.

Every time they agree to go out, they literally say "Oh nevermind".

0 Reply

Big_Boss Big_Boss

In response to “****, I forgot to press anonymous lul. Every...

The fact that you actually have the courage to ask a girl out (which a lot of guys don`t have) probably means that you`ll find the right one eventually regardless of your looks. And I`m sure you`re not that bad. You just have to be confident. That`s important.

0 Reply

Anonymous

Or at least the personality they portray. They could be a completely different person offline.

+881 Reply

Mtrenchie Mtrenchie

The only thing that takes me a while to get past when it comes to physical appearance is toe thumbs. Shallow? Yes. Deal-Breaker? No.
Just something about them....throws me off so much. BUT personality fixes that.

0 Reply

Jonesy Jonesy

In response to “The only thing that takes me a while to get...

Like... Megan Fox?:P

+22 Reply

Anonymous

In response to “Like... Megan Fox?:P

I was gonna say that but she could have a nice personality haha:P but yes exactly like her

0 Reply

Jonesy Jonesy

Hng, stop with the online crush homepage posts, it's making me feel bad I have one.

0 Reply

guitarplayer213 guitarplayer213

In response to “Hng, stop with the online crush homepage...

Shouldn't it make you feel less bad since it's made to seem really normal?

+33 Reply

Anonymous

I feel like a terrible person after reading posts like this because a very large part of my crush decision-making is based off of that person's attractiveness, popularity, way they dress, etc. Maybe it's because I've never met someone with a personality so great that it overpowers their looks, but I usually can't look past appearance. This may also be because I'm gay, and every guy that I talk to is more than likely straight, so I just focus on looks because I know I have no possibility of dating them.

+11 Reply

Galileo Galileo

In response to “I feel like a terrible person after reading...

You shouldn't feel like that you're an animal, after all, and its your instinct. You want to find a mate that is attractive, healthy, and strong, because you want your kids to be strong offspring.

0 Reply

mchalla3 mchalla3

In response to “You shouldn't feel like that you're an...

Lol he couldn't have kids in his predicament.

+231 Reply

Jonesy Jonesy

In response to “Lol he couldn't have kids in his predicament.

This really makes me wonder. Do gay people have the instinct to find attractive mates for healthy offspring?

0 Reply

mchalla3 mchalla3

In response to “This really makes me wonder. Do gay people...

The reason men like breasts is for that very instinct so I wouldn't believe so. Plus the fact that they know that they're not gonna have a biological child.

-33 Reply

Jonesy Jonesy

In response to “This really makes me wonder. Do gay people...

Yes, they do. If their reproductive evolutionary instincts weren't still there, they wouldn't be having sex.

+66 Reply

Suzywao Suzywao

In response to “Yes, they do. If their reproductive...

Doesn't necessarily have to be that one specific reproductive instinct

-11 Reply

Jonesy Jonesy

In response to “Doesn't necessarily have to be that one...

Why would some randomly shut off?

+33 Reply

Suzywao Suzywao

In response to “Why would some randomly shut off?

well humans arent all the same. he may not have the instinct to reproduce, nothing wrong with it. were not all programmed the same. some people have a fight instinct, some people have the flight instinct.

0 Reply

Jonesy Jonesy

In response to “well humans arent all the same. he may not...

All I'm saying is, if you want to **** something, that's reproduction instincts. Even if you can't actually reproduce. I don't feel like getting into an evolutionary psychology debate if you don't mind. <3

+33 Reply

Suzywao Suzywao

In response to “I feel like a terrible person after reading...

You shouldn't feel like that you're an animal, after all, and its your instinct. You want to find a mate that is attractive, healthy, and strong, because you want your kids to be strong offspring.

0 Reply

mchalla3 mchalla3

In response to “I feel like a terrible person after reading...

Surprised that popularity still is a factor. I thought that died with the 80's haha

+331 Reply

Jonesy Jonesy

In response to “Surprised that popularity still is a factor...

I meant that more as social group.

0 Reply

Galileo Galileo

Personality? The Internet is all about visual; every person on the Internet I've liked the look or sound of, this has only ever been after I thought they were hot. Sorry to disappoint.

0 Reply

dzmax

It probably varies from person to person, but I still think this is a valid point. Even if you do end up liking the way they look, you still starting crushing on them before you knew - it obviously wasn't a deciding factor, unlike in real life, where it is pretty much THE only thing that counts (come on; how many people do you know saying they have a crush on someone they have spoken to all of once, if that?). But like I said, the importance of appearance varies from person to person.

+221 Reply

Chou

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