+441 Guys: Whenever you pee and it comes out in multiple directions you call your penis a "dick" and then it looks at you and you both laugh together at how you were accidentally clever but then you realise your dick shouldn't be laughing or looking at you so you begin to yell at it until it goes limp. But then you feel bad for yelling so massage it until you're back on speaking terms. Then as you begin to recollect about what just happen you think, "Wow this hypothetical has gotten way out of hand.", amirite?

by Anonymous 11 years ago

This happened on the bus once.

by Anonymous 11 years ago

And that's why I don't the bus.

by Anonymous 11 years ago

I think you the verb in your sentence.

by Anonymous 11 years ago

It's none of business where I my verbs.

by Anonymous 11 years ago

How high are you?

by Anonymous 11 years ago

No, it's "hi, how are you?"

by Anonymous 11 years ago

Yes.

by Anonymous 11 years ago

http://ctrlv.in/114854

by Anonymous 11 years ago

My dad had a professor who when someone would say "Hi" to him, he would say "not currently, but I will be later"

by Anonymous 11 years ago

Boy, that escalated quickly. I mean, that really got out of hand, fast.

by Anonymous 11 years ago

Ejaculated*

by Anonymous 11 years ago

Does anyone else kiss and makeup or is that just me?

by Anonymous 11 years ago

..most of us aren't able.

by Anonymous 11 years ago

For some reason this only happens when I'm doing drugs. hmm

by Anonymous 11 years ago

Gosh, I hate it when that happens.

by Anonymous 11 years ago

But it's already in your hand! Lolololololol.

by Anonymous 11 years ago

...I have a vagina.

by Anonymous 11 years ago

I actually don't menstruate anymore...

by Anonymous 11 years ago

If you yell at your vagina for bleeding i'm pretty sure you're just going to make it mad. "GOD! YOU'RE SO STUPID, VAGINA!" "YOU'RE GOING TO REGRET SAYING THAT, CARSHAYD!" *bleeds and cramps some more*

by Anonymous 11 years ago

That doesn't happen when I yell at my penis for bleeding.

by Anonymous 11 years ago

You should be greatful... My penis bleeds once a week, and I don't get //anything// in return.

by Anonymous 11 years ago

This is why your parents don't love you.

by Anonymous 11 years ago

Dafuq did i just read lolwut

by Anonymous 11 years ago

The POTD. The admins of this site arbitrarily decide what post deserves special recognition and dedicate an entire twenty-four hour period to the post that they feel meets their standards for that day.

by Anonymous 11 years ago

Thanks Shadi. I was really confused for a second there.

by Anonymous 11 years ago

Anytime, gurrrlfraynd.

by Anonymous 11 years ago

Hi, hello. This is Chauncy Pickles. Nice to meet you.

by Anonymous 11 years ago

I'm getting used to being comfortable with myself. It's an adjustment period we must all undergo.

by Anonymous 11 years ago

One of the very few odd moments where i'm thankful for my vagina.

by Anonymous 11 years ago

Is the last part supposed to be a pun? hmm

by Anonymous 11 years ago

Is his name Richard?

by Anonymous 11 years ago

My dad's name is Richard wary

by Anonymous 11 years ago

I'm happy for you.

by Anonymous 11 years ago

I'm not. Too many of my friends make dick jokes

by Anonymous 11 years ago

Haayyyy

by Anonymous 11 years ago

DAD?!

by Anonymous 11 years ago

Your dad is young.

by Anonymous 11 years ago

Your dad's a dick. Teehee.

by Anonymous 11 years ago

I heard that in some rap song ones. It was something like "She like mah d*ck. Named it Richard." I laughed nonstop after I heard that. I thought it was so freaking clever.

by Anonymous 11 years ago

Once*

by Anonymous 11 years ago

now i love you even more

by Anonymous 11 years ago

And then we go out for smoothies and talk about politics and the new Expendables movie in eye-popping 3D, which is kind of an odd way to advertise a movie. Like, "Hey, come see this movie and your retinas will slowly expand until they burst from the sheer awesomeness of the wonderful invention that is 3D!" I'm pretty sure if 3D was actually eye-popping we''d have a shit-ton of blind people walking around and cinemas would suddenly turn into mass graves.

by Anonymous 11 years ago

@Gryndstone Lol, that comment changed topics super fast.

by Anonymous 11 years ago

I thought this was gonna be a Me and My Dick reference, but this is okay too

by Anonymous 11 years ago

Whenever i'm on omegle and some guy says he wants to buy my pussy, i look at my cat and we both laugh together at the idea of us ever being separated but then I realise my cat shouldn't be laughing so i yell at him until he stops. But then i feel bad for yelling so i rub my pussy and comb its hair. And then i message the guy on omegle and tell him that i can't give him my pussy now, but i want him to have it when i die.

by Anonymous 11 years ago

Is that a common thing to ask or...?

by Anonymous 11 years ago

Let's be honest. No one has ever asked to see your pussy.

by Anonymous 11 years ago

Play nice and admit your strong sexual desire for her.

by Anonymous 11 years ago

Favvkes, you would make this about cats. :p and anon, grow some balls and show your username. I, on the other hand, think she's pretty.

by Anonymous 11 years ago

goo

by Anonymous 11 years ago

Favvkes, go the fuck to sleep

by Anonymous 11 years ago

Yes master

by Anonymous 11 years ago

I lost it at the last line. I actually laughed really hard. Bravo good sir.

by Anonymous 11 years ago

What.

by Anonymous 11 years ago

**9/10. Hypothetical, and very funny, made me laugh.**

by Anonymous 11 years ago

oh i get it, it has to be HYPOTHETICAL to be good

by Anonymous 11 years ago

Gtfo

by Anonymous 11 years ago

Lol you said "u mad bro". Even newfag failtrolls don't use that

by Anonymous 11 years ago

No. Don't tell me what to do. I'm already semi famous. My life has no meaning. I am the internet.

by Anonymous 11 years ago

Sounds like a plan.

by Anonymous 11 years ago

This barely makes sense anymore with the censors which for some reason are only two asterisks.

by Anonymous 11 years ago