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What do you do when you know someone will fight with you the next time you see each other?

Explained by Sofia...

(When I say fight, I mean verbally) - I know someone who, the next time we see each other, will try to pick a fight with me. Since I don't like that person, chances are I'll snap depends on what she says. I don't deal well with people who I dislike speaking about me, and this is the type of person that will try to insult you with a superior attitude, which I really dislike. I'm already getting annoyed (-_-) I hate this.

Top Comment

I'll try to keep calm, and not jump into the fire, but I'm not feeling confident about this.

I can be quick to anger when dealing with people I dislike.

+141414 See / Add Replies

Sofia Sofia OP

Comments

I'll try to keep calm, and not jump into the fire, but I'm not feeling confident about this.

I can be quick to anger when dealing with people I dislike.

+141414 Reply

Sofia Sofia OP

In response to “I'll try to keep calm, and not jump into the...

I can certainly understand that. Negative people have a way of pushing your buttons.

+111 Reply

Balou Balou

I have a relative like that, they think they have the answer for everything and they ask you questions just so that they can tell you you're wrong. I have avoided them for about ten years now. But I guess you're not in a position to do that?

+111110 Reply

OzSurfer OzSurfer

In response to “Sadly...

(eek)

+888 Reply

OzSurfer OzSurfer

Since this is me giving you advice...I can say what I want. Right.

You can be snippy and direct, too, missy. I've gotten used to it and I like you now...but there was a time when I wasn't sure.... And I understand you are at a different stage of your life...

My advice would be to: don't even let it register on the computer of your mind. Sail past it. Look at it with love. If you don't like that person...that's all about you...and you know that. There is something about that person that you can't stand about yourself. I understand that. You also can have a superior attitude.

+667 Reply

Sukiesnow Sukiesnow

In response to “Since this is me giving //you// advice...I...

Well, I'll give you an advice of my own: don't try to analyze me and tell me about my life and my feelings, because all you just said really doesn't fit with the reality of the situation.

I dislike this person because she's not a good person - not because I see something of me in her. So, no, I don't know that, and neither do you. I didn't even explained the entire situation, so I'm not sure why are you trying to describe it. I asked what would you do if you had to face someone you knew wanted to fight with you, using a general view of my own situation. You didn't answer my question.

+111111 Reply

Sofia Sofia OP

In response to “Well, I'll give you an advice of my own:...

So...you asked; and I answered. That should at least be respected. You cannot control how people comment.

True. What I would do is the same as I instructed you to do...when I said "My advice would be to...etc."

+445 Reply

Sukiesnow Sukiesnow

In response to “So...you asked; and I answered. That should...

I'm not controlling any comment. I'm not disrespecting anyone. So, I don't see your point.

You told me how I feel and why I dislike this person. You were wrong and I said so. You told me how I should react in my situation. You didn't said that's how you react or if this ever happened to you. I give advises to people that I wouldn't follow, because we're different people, with different situations. You were speaking about me, not you. So that's why I said you didn't answer my question. Hope that helps to understand why I said what I said.

+887 Reply

Sofia Sofia OP

In response to “I'm not controlling any comment. I'm not...

I don't see your point, either, Sofia. So that makes us even.

+222 Reply

Sukiesnow Sukiesnow

In response to “I don't see your point, either, Sofia. So...

Actually, it doesn't. I was being sarcastic and ignoring your attempts to insult me, because I wasn't sure if you were doing on purpose or not.

My point is - you are talking about me, not you. I asked about you.

+443 Reply

Sofia Sofia OP

In response to “Actually, it doesn't. I was being sarcastic...

No, that's wrong: it's not sarcastic. It's more like... playing coy? I think that's the correct expression. I just wanted to be sure I wasn't jumping the gun on this and assume things wrong.

+221 Reply

Sofia Sofia OP

In response to “Actually, it doesn't. I was being sarcastic...

But I did (after you pointed it out) say that "What I would do is the same as I instructed you to do...when I said 'My advice would be to...etc.'"

So here: I copied it out...what I wrote in the first comment. So I hope that is what you wanted to hear.

This is what I would do:

What I would do is: not to let it register on the computer of my mind. Sail past it. Look at it with love. If i don't like a person....that's more about me...everyone knows that... There is something about this person that I dislike about myself. I understand that.

+222 Reply

Sukiesnow Sukiesnow

In response to “But I //did// (after you pointed it out) say...

I'm not sure why you're still replying as if I'm still asking for you to answer my post. I only asked once for you to answer (on my first reply).

My second reply was me explaining my reasoning behind my first reply. My third reply was me saying what my point is, since you said you didn't get it. On neither of those comments I was asking for you to answer the post. As you said, you answered right after I pointed it out - "What I would do is the same as I instructed you to do...". I saw that for myself.

+332 Reply

Sofia Sofia OP

In response to “I'm not sure why you're still replying as if...

Please you two don't fall out over this I mean I understand it's really not for me or JD to get involved here it's just we'd both hate to see two good friends fall out over such things. 乂

+445 Reply

Ada Ada

In response to “Since this is me giving //you// advice...I...

That's kinda rude, you have just insulted the OP and not answered the post...

+332 Reply

JD JD

In response to “That's kinda rude, you have just insulted the...

This has nothing to do with you.

+111 Reply

Sukiesnow Sukiesnow

In response to “This has nothing to do with you.

You are both my friends, so it does concern me....and I tell it as I see it....I think your comment was out of order...

+332 Reply

JD JD

I would do anything in my power to avoid that person.

+141415 Reply

Tiffanee Tiffanee

In response to “I would do anything in my power to avoid that...

I kind of want to do that, but I really just want to get this over with, and I can't really avoid this person for long.

+999 Reply

Sofia Sofia OP

In response to “I would do anything in my power to avoid that...

Good morning, friend!

+778 Reply

StarzAbove StarzAbove

In response to “Good morning, friend!

Good morning!

+999 Reply

Tiffanee Tiffanee

In response to “Good morning!

Enjoy your day!

+888 Reply

StarzAbove StarzAbove

Avoid them if it's possible , if it's not the I would have no choice but to try and resolve the problem between us.

Been there a few times , sometimes it worked out great , sometimes not so great.

I'll give you two examples Sophia

eg # 1

One Irish Woman colleague under me at the time I kept arguing with became my Best friend. She got to know me after I had it out with her and saw me as less of a threat and we had a great time together going to Irish pub lock ins. XD

Drinking copious amounts of alcohol ,Singing at the top of our voices , Dancing on the bar and tables until the early hours of
the morning. Going back to hers and snogging her Brother (She didn't know about that little detail but I can't resist rugged Irish Men) (hello)


(I think my Liver went into rehab when Kay went back to Ireland.) :P

eg # 2

One South African Woman who was pissed I was seeing her ex , threw one of my ornaments across my flat at my head when I invited her up for a glass of Wine and a chat because of the tension that had been building between us.

Hell hath no Fury like a Woman Scorned

lolz things got very physical at that point I think I clumped Debbie with the Wine bottle but I can't be sure.

All I remember is a friend (a Guy) pulling us off each other or at least trying. lolz (beye)(beye) I think he got more than one whack too.

["Never come between two Women fighting unless you're wearing padding Guys. (beye) we're Vicious and will aim for your Balls everytime".] lolz (hehe)(hello)(hehe)

I should make this a Serenity thought for the day (hehe)

(I think I realised things could never be resolved with Debbie when a mutual friend told me She was hoping I'd fall under a Bus and Die , so her and my fella could be together.) I actually watched my Back for a while because She was that Jealous I thought She may of been the one to push me under.)

Some Bitches are seriously unstable (wary)

+121212 Reply

Darkest_Serenity Darkest_Serenity

In response to “Avoid them if it's possible , if it's not the...

Lol xD I'm pretty sure things won't get physical.

+999 Reply

Sofia Sofia OP

In response to “Lol xD I'm pretty sure things won't get physical.

I can't , believe the Cow picked up one of my favourite Ornaments and it was a gift , if She'd picked up one of my Collection I have now I'd of hung her out the window lolz



No one is allowed to touch my figurines , the wings break off my **** Fallen Angels so easily. (hehe)

+222 Reply

Darkest_Serenity Darkest_Serenity

I have people like that here on Amirite. No matter what I have said or not said, they arrive and start picking a fight. Sometimes I take the bait, big mistake, other times I just ignore them, and if it gets really bad they are blocked. I wonder about the mentality of people who only want to fight or disagree with others. Guess they lead a very miserable life.

They would be much happier if they got along with others or at least be civil to one another.

+999 Reply

StarzAbove StarzAbove

In response to “Agreed.

(y)

+666 Reply

StarzAbove StarzAbove

Try to be nice at first, then if that doesn't work ...

+888 Reply

Synyster Synyster

In response to “Try to be nice at first, then if that doesn't...

Lol, nah xD I'm not one to get physical.

+666 Reply

Sofia Sofia OP

In response to “Lol, nah xD I'm not one to get physical.

Okay, I understand, but Lucille is there for ya. (hehe)

+666 Reply

Synyster Synyster

In response to “Okay, I understand, but Lucille is there for...

She's too bloody for me xD

+666 Reply

Sofia Sofia OP

I think the key is to shut them down before they get a chance to snipe at you. :)

+101010 Reply

Will_Janitor Will_Janitor

Just go about my life, I can't change how other people behave. What can you do? No sense in worrying about. Tell them to kick rocks and go about my day. The end.

+777 Reply

ForkNdaRoad ForkNdaRoad

In response to “Just go about my life, I can't change how...

I wish I could do that.

+445 Reply

Sofia Sofia OP

In response to “I wish I could do that.

You can, you'll have to eventually. Just realize that no amount of arguing is going to make them stop talking about you, it will only feed them more ammunition. Letting it go is the quickest way to shut down that nonsense.

Besides, allowing it to bother you only punishes you and that's a pretty counterproductive thing to subject yourself to when you just want to exist in peace, right?

+555 Reply

ForkNdaRoad ForkNdaRoad

In response to “You can, you'll have to eventually. Just...

I can't. There's just some things that I can't just say "Yeah, whatever". It doesn't always work.

I live with this person. And this is not just "she's talking about me" problem - yeah, I dislike that kind of attitude, but the real problem isn't just that. If it was, I would be fine.

+445 Reply

Sofia Sofia OP

In response to “I can't. There's just some things that I...

Live with ? As a partner or sharer

+444 Reply

JD JD

In response to “Live with ? As a partner or sharer

Sharer.

+444 Reply

Sofia Sofia OP

In response to “Sharer.

Stop sharing...you move or she moves..who owns the place

+444 Reply

JD JD

In response to “Stop sharing...you move or she moves..who...

None of us own it. And none of us will move. Eventually, it will work out.

+333 Reply

Sofia Sofia OP

In response to “I can't. There's just some things that I...

Ah... that's a whole other creature altogether. And yes, I understand it's more than saying "whatever."

It's just that at the end of the day, being upset doesn't change anything, you know? It only punishes you twice.

+444 Reply

ForkNdaRoad ForkNdaRoad

Sofia Sofia OP

Sofia, you are very good with words.
I feel certain you can shut this woman down with words.
Choose them wisely and she will be left with her jaw dropped

+777 Reply

Carla Carla

In response to “Sofia, you are very good with words. I feel...

Let's hope so.

Have this happened to you? Not my situation. But someone you knew that wanted to pick a fight with you.

+666 Reply

Sofia Sofia OP

In response to “Let's hope so. Have this happened to you?...

Oh, yes sofia.
My best defense is to just shut those people down.
And when there is a witness, it generally is the last time that shit comes from the same direction again.

Just know that no one....no one is superior to you. That kind of attitude will serve to make her appear...small

+666 Reply

Carla Carla

If someone is not nice you can do a few things,
And you are.........? for people who are ugly and you don't see often. That makes them so insignificant as to not even register on your radar.
Are you having a bad day? for people who are just ugly and you want them off guard.
How long are we going to do this? for people who you want to resolve issues with.
And last and most effective just silence and a long pause, the just walk away.

Good luck.

+666 Reply

ozzyboy ozzyboy

In response to “If someone is not nice you can do a few...

Thank you :)

+444 Reply

Sofia Sofia OP

Just laugh at them...tell them you don't like them and to move on...with some people this will work and others it won't ..

+666 Reply

JD JD

In response to “Just laugh at them...tell them you don't like...

It won't work with this one xD If I laugh, it will make everything worse. She's aware I don't like her already.

+333 Reply

Sofia Sofia OP

In response to “It won't work with this one xD If I laugh, it...

Beat her up....hehe

+444 Reply

JD JD

In response to “Beat her up....hehe

Lol, no. Not my way of resolving stuff.

+333 Reply

Sofia Sofia OP

Not show up or show up and take it like a man

+445 Reply

Sunny_the_skeptic Sunny_the_skeptic

I've never been in that position

+444 Reply

Trish Trish

Try not to see them. I do not involve myself in fighting of any sort.

+443 Reply

LorraineTwevlehundredRaineTwelvehundred LorraineTwevlehundredRaineTwelvehundred

I will avoid the person at all cost or ready to pick a fight if I'm angry too.

+444 Reply

MKDan MKDan

Make sure I see him first. :)

+555 Reply

DW2 DW2

give it 20 years....then send a card

+444 Reply

Freeranger Freeranger

In response to “give it 20 years....then send a card

Lol. We're not close enough to send cards to each other xD

+443 Reply

Sofia Sofia OP

In response to “Lol. We're not close enough to send cards to...

bleddy hell.....I hear tin cans and sting have certain properties?

+333 Reply

Freeranger Freeranger

Some people believe they raise their self-worth by lowering others. One of my sister's married such a person. Sometimes I can avoid him. Sometimes I can't. When I can't, I keep his motivation in mind. His behavior then looks more pathetic than antagonistic. Another strategy that works for me is getting my point across with pseudo humor. Like, "Hey I have an idea. Why don't you use (random person) as a human doormat today"?
(wink)

+555 Reply

PhilboydStudge PhilboydStudge

In response to “Some people believe they raise their...

Lol xD Does he get it?

+444 Reply

Sofia Sofia OP

In response to “Lol xD Does he get it?

Yes, but it doesn't necessarily discourage him for long.

+444 Reply

PhilboydStudge PhilboydStudge

Ignore.

+555 Reply

Masha Masha

I'd fight 'em.

+445 Reply

AliceD AliceD

In response to “I'd fight 'em.

I'd back you up. :)

+445 Reply

DW2 DW2

In response to “I'd back you up. :)

Nah-uh. Ganging up on others is not allowed xD

+334 Reply

Sofia Sofia OP

In response to “Nah-uh. Ganging up on others is not allowed xD

If it was more than 10 people. I'd probably step in. Otherwise pretty sure I wouldn't be needed. :)

+444 Reply

DW2 DW2

I stay away from those kind of people.

if for some reason i can't.
I'll say what i need to say in as few words as possible...then walk away.

if i'm not allowed to walk away, then we have another problem.

I'm having a difficult time remembering when this last happened to me..

+555 Reply

DandyDon DandyDon

In response to “I stay away from those kind of people. if...

If you can't remember, then that's a good sign :D

I've already faced her, btw - It wasn't as bad as I thought it would be (I did raise my voice once though). It got resolved pretty quick.

+555 Reply

Sofia Sofia OP

In response to “If you can't remember, then that's a good...

That's good, glad to hear that (biggrin)

+555 Reply

DandyDon DandyDon

Pimp slap her, bet she won't disrespect again

+443 Reply

C_ZAR1 C_ZAR1

In response to “Pimp slap her, bet she won't disrespect again

Eh... not really my way of doing things xD

+444 Reply

Sofia Sofia OP

In response to “Eh... not really my way of doing things xD

LMAO!!
Just kidding hon (smile)

+444 Reply

C_ZAR1 C_ZAR1

If you really can't avoid them then take a deep breath and be disarmingly nice.It will really annoy them!
Or just let rip like I would!😡

+444 Reply

Blewynanifail Blewynanifail

Phone them, make an appointment and sort out the trouble. I find when you approach people about them wanting to fight with you, they are not that keen on fighting anymore. Most people are cowards when confronted.

+444 Reply

voxlug voxlug

I don't fight with anyone, argue maybe but I usually walk away instead.

+443 Reply

LorraineTwevlehundredRaineTwelvehundred LorraineTwevlehundredRaineTwelvehundred

I guess it depends on the situation, but I'd probably think about it constantly, probably feeling anxious, considering all the possible outcomes, trying to imagine what I can and should say, how I can and should react, going back and forth between options in my mind, wondering what's the best way to sort out the problem. ...And it would probably end up not being as bad as I had imagined (it's normal to overthink in this kind of situation).

But I'm glad to know that it's already over, and that it wasn't as bad as you thought it would be.

+444 Reply

primeiro primeiro

In response to “I guess it depends on the situation, but I'd...

Yeah xD Overthinking is something I do now and then.

+333 Reply

Sofia Sofia OP

I gear up with my facts, unless Im in the wrong, in that case I humbly apologize.

+444 Reply

Jaxxi Jaxxi

It is not easy to deal with such conflictual situations, which remind much of emotional or psychological abuse, and every case is different.

Personally, I would talk to a trustworthy friend or family member, ask for an expert's advice (or join an officially recognised self-help group) and take notes, collect evidence - if necessary - and arrange for an explanation in the presence or through the intermediary of a professional, but in certain situations, that might not work.

May I propose some information, which could be of interest?

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Verbal_abuse

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/a...b_8889808.html

https://www.psychologytoday.com...otional-abuser

https://psychcentral.com/blog/a...itical-people/

http://ezinearticles.com/?21-Wa...#38;id=5408859

http://thelawdictionary.org/art...-mental-abuse/

+444 Reply

Marianne Marianne

In response to “It is not easy to deal with such conflictual...

It's nothing that serious - but thank you, Marianne :D

+222 Reply

Sofia Sofia OP

In response to “It's nothing that serious - but thank you...

You're welcome, Sofia.

+222 Reply

Marianne Marianne

Are things sorted with this house mate Sofia ?
did you talk to her babe (think)

+666 Reply

Darkest_Serenity Darkest_Serenity

In response to “Are things sorted with this house mate Sofia...

It's done. We sorted it out (smile)

+222 Reply

Sofia Sofia OP

I try to avoid such people. For example my ex always wants to pick a fight. That is why she is my ex!

+333 Reply

Balou Balou

In response to “I try to avoid such people. For example my ex...

Good choice there.

+333 Reply

Sofia Sofia OP

What Tiffanee said

+222 Reply

Bub Bub

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