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Does anyone have any famous people in their ancestry?
Oversleeping     <b>*    The new family in the neighborhood overslept and their six-year-old daughter missed her school bus. The father, though late for work himself, had to drive her. Since he did not know the way, he said that she would have to direct him to the school. They rode several blocks before she told him to turn the first time, several more before she indicated another turn. This went on for 20 minutes – but when they finally reached the school, it proved to be only a short distance from their home. The father, much annoyed, asked his daughter why she’d led him around in such a circle. The child explained, “That’s the way the school bus goes, Daddy. It’s the only way I know.”    </b>*    Link: http://www.jokes4us.com/peoplejokes/teachersjokes/missedthebusjoke.html
Ever had thundersnow?
The greatest enemy of progress is the illusion of knowledge
If I asked you to boost Tracy, Carol, Denise, Iris and Shannon, what would I be talking about? If I told you the ladies were dirty, what would that mean? If I told you I needed 50 ladies delivered in 24 hrs, could you meet the deadline?
Avast me 'earties.You have opened a school for trainee pirates.Whats on the curriculum?

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Where's this Screaming Baby from?    <b>*    Little Johnny's new baby brother is screaming up a storm. He asks his mom, "Where'd we get him?" His mother replies, "He came from Heaven, Johnny." Johnny says, "Wow! I can see why they threw him out!"    </b>*    Link: http://www.laughfactory.com/jokes/family-jokes/8
Why so Early ?   <b>*  One day Jimmy got home early from school and his mom asked, "Why are you home so early?" He answered, "Because I was the only one that answered a question in my class." She said, "Wow, my son is a genius. What was the question?" Jimmy replied, "The question was 'Who threw the trash can at the principal's head?'"     </b>*   Link: http://www.laughfactory.com/jokes/family-jokes
Anyone want to see a wolf-sized otter with the bite of a bear?

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Finding a BFF can be as hard as finding a partner.

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๐Ÿ‡ Would it be a violation of human rights if the government restricted the amount of children you can have according to your income? ๐Ÿ‡
Social media has taken over in America to such an extreme that to get my own kids to look back a week in their history is a miracle, let alone 100 years.

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๐Ÿ„ It is impossible to be a know-it-all without having equal parts of ignorance and arrogance. <em>amirite?</em>  ๐Ÿ„
First Grade Learns Animal Names -  * One day the teacher decides to play an animal game.  She holds up a picture of a giraffe and asks if anyone knows what it is. No one raises his/her hand.  - The teacher says, "See it's long neck?  What animal has a long neck?"  Sally holds up her hand and asks if it is a giraffe.  "Very good, Sally," the teacher replies. Next she holds up a picture of a zebra. None of the students holds up his/her hand.  - "See the stripes on this animal? What animal has stripes?" Billy holds up his hand and says it is a zebra.  "Very good, Billy," the teacher replies.  Next she holds up a picture of a deer. None of the students holds up his/her hand.  - "See the big antlers on this animal. What animal has horns like this?" Still no one guesses.  "Let me give you another hint: it's something your mother calls your father."  Johnny shouts out, "I know what it is! It's a <b>** </b>**."  --- * Link:  http://www.jokelibrary.net/education/school1.html#old_fashioned_catholic_discipline

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๐ŸคžWe master the creation of illusions to conceal the emptiness engraved within us. <em>amirite?</em>๐Ÿคž
The Orionid Meteor shower peaks tonight. Is the weather going to be clear for you to get a peek?

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๐Ÿญ What kind of students do teachers dislike the most? ๐Ÿญ
Ask Alice! Do you remember your first wet dream?
JC Biology Class  Mr. Perkins, the biology instructor at a posh suburban girl's junior college, said during class, "Miss Smythe, would you please name the organ of the human body , which under the appropriate conditions, expands to six times its normal size, and define the conditions."   Miss Smythe gasped, then said freezingly,  "Mr. Perkins, I don't think that is a proper question to ask me. I assure you my parents will hear of this."  With that she sat down, red-faced.   Unperturbed, Mr. Perkins called on Miss Johnson and asked the same question.  Miss Johnson, with composure, replied, "The pupil of the eye, in dim light."   "Correct," said Mr. Perkins.  "And now, Miss Smythe, I have three things to say to you.  One, you have not studied your lesson. Two, you have a dirty mind. And three, you will some day be faced with a dreadful disappointment."   Link: http://www.jokelibrary.net/education/school1.html#old_fashioned_catholic_discipline
Occasionally I have heard urged that the Left is rewriting history.  When/where?

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