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You can have sex without being in love or loving someone, but you can't be in love or love someone without having sex. Amirite?

19%Yeah You Are81%No Way
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So does this mean to love my family I have to practice incest?

Ethans avatar Ethan No Way +6Reply
@Ethan So does this mean to love my family I have to practice incest?

Loving some one and being in love with them aren't the same thing.

@ThisBlackChick Loving some one and being in love with them aren't the same thing.

I realize that and that is WHY I named both of them in the relation to having sex.

@freespeechfreelancer I realize that and that is WHY I named both of them in the relation to having sex.

That comment wasn't in reference to your original post, but rather to the first comment.

@ThisBlackChick That comment wasn't in reference to your original post, but rather to the first comment.

I still have trouble on this site knowing when someone is directing their comment to me or someone else. I get the notification, so I assume the comment was for me. Guess this really shows my old age.

@freespeechfreelancer I still have trouble on this site knowing when someone is directing their comment to me or someone else. I get the...

I don't know if this is also on the full site, but on the iPhone app, at the top of a reply, it says "in response to 'blah blah blah'"

That might help clear up confusion.

@Ethan So does this mean to love my family I have to practice incest?

Did I really have to spell out a significant other for you to get it????

@freespeechfreelancer Did I really have to spell out a significant other for you to get it????

You said "loving someone" not loving a lover. Those are two completely different things. And even if that was there, i'm sorry, but I think you can love someone without physically loving them, but that's just me.

Ethans avatar Ethan No Way 0Reply
@Ethan You said "loving someone" not loving a lover. Those are two completely different things. And even if that was...

My OP assumed I was talking about a partner. Why? Because MOST people don't have sex with relatives! There is such a thing as "reading between the lines" and we all do it every single day when conversing with others.

@freespeechfreelancer My OP assumed I was talking about a partner. Why? Because MOST people don't have sex with relatives! There is such...

I know what you were implying, I was pointing that the wording was off. But I think I could love someone without sex.

Ethans avatar Ethan No Way 0Reply
@Ethan I know what you were implying, I was pointing that the wording was off. But I think I could love someone without sex.

And this is why I like mixing it up on a site like this because I am learning that things REALLY have changed quite a bit since I was much younger. My views are predominantly a result of my generation. The generation I see mostly on this site definitely has a different take on many topics. I am not putting anyone down or bashing younger people. I am simply pointing out what I see.

@Ethan Pointing out what? That older people like sex?

OMG.....I think there is a major communication breakdown here. "Pointing out what I see" is my referring to what I said about comparing my generation to yours. What I was pointing out was the differences I see in the replies or views held by your generation - that is it! And of course older people like and love sex just as much as younger people. We may be older, but we are not ancient and non-functional.

@freespeechfreelancer OMG.....I think there is a major communication breakdown here. "Pointing out what I see" is my referring to what I...

I KNOW THAT. I KNOW WHAT "Pointing out what I see". I'm asking you what your generation sees differently...

Ethans avatar Ethan No Way 0Reply
@Ethan I KNOW THAT. I KNOW WHAT "Pointing out what I see". I'm asking you what your generation sees differently...

For starters this particular topic we are commenting on. Read the other comments below all of this. I made some comments to another poster that may help clarify. Generations DO see and view things differently because of the context or environment we are all raised in. Since TIMES change, so do many other things. For example, when I was a kid, watching cartoons was purely for pleasure and the cartoons actually made kids laugh. I have watched some of the newer cartoons and been around children watching them, and nobody laughs any more. They are all about mega powers or some overall universal struggle to dominate. Machines and weaponry are the main context. I grew up watching Road Runner, Bugs Bunny, and Tom & Jerry!
Also, the nuclear family (dad, mom, and kids) was the norm when I grew up. Most kids had a dad and mom at home. And in more cases than not, the dad went to work (was the breadwinner) and mom stayed home to tend the house and raise the kids. I knew as a reality what it was to belong to a "Brady Bunch" or "Leave It To Beaver" or "The Waltons" kind of environment. That is no longer true today. As I said above, the whole context has shifted and it definitely affects the whole picture. I am not putting down the younger generation in any way. I actually think it is much harder and more difficult for the youth today than it was for me.

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@1926495

But at some point you would want to have sex to show the love - correct?

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@1926507

Interesting....................

@1926507

So if sex in the context of ultimate love FOR and TO someone is not an expression of such, then what is it's purpose? Purely to procreate?

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@1926516

Ok............that is all fine with me - but in my personal experience and reference point, it IS the ultimate way of expressing and showing my love for my mate. I show love in many ways and through various actions, but nothing comes close to the depth and bond (physically and emotionally) experienced in the sexual encounter. There has to be something to all of this because "experts" still tell us that the 2 biggest tension and friction points in any relationship are MONEY and SEX. I have lived long enough now to say by knowledge and experience that those are correct. If those 2 topics are not in agreement by both parties, the union will not last indefinitely.

Siblings and close family pets???

@TaNtricLuNarMoNkey3 Siblings and close family pets???

Unbelievable that some of you just don't GET IT! Read the thread of comments and you might just somehow wake up.

@freespeechfreelancer Unbelievable that some of you just don't GET IT! Read the thread of comments and you might just somehow wake up.

Dude, it's ok, I'm joking. But for future reference you might want to spell it out. Some people just look for stuff like that, and other people, who think less strictly, might single your omission out for joking purposes.

Anyways, all that aside, I personally have experienced very fulfilling platonic love interests. Did I want to screw that person? HEll yes. But was it the best thing considering she was the type to burn a relationship to the ground with such passion? No. Not when I wanted the star that burnt the longest.
And as I predicted, that relationship was slowly destroyed by jealousy and lusty abandon once we did it, just because of the dynamic between the two people we were. Some people are just right for love, and some people are right for that and the whole world of birds and bees. And others fuck real good.

@TaNtricLuNarMoNkey3 Dude, it's ok, I'm joking. But for future reference you might want to spell it out. Some people just look for stuff...

Donkeys, Cows, horses, or sheep - whatever floats your boat! LOL. I see your point, but remember, I am writing from the perspective of a 54 yr. old man - so obviously there is a difference to many who might read my posts who are much younger and who are probably still living at home. All of those things factor in. Some of the teens on here think I am "putting them down" or questioning their intelligence by referring to their youth versus my age. That is not it at all. I write looking back on many of the things I have thought, done, and lived. A 14 - 17 yr. old has not lived the life of an adult yet, and can not possibly understand all there is to know that goes in to holding down a self sustaining job, paying all the bills, raising kids, being married, etc. For the record and from my personal experience - I slept with several girls that I did not love, but the 2 women I loved whole heartedly in my lifetime, I slept with as well. All my OP is trying to say from my own vantage point is that any 2 people can have sex without love being involved. But I personally see no way that 2 people who are in love or who deeply love each other (excluding relatives, pets, and imaginary friends) can have a thriving lasting relationship WITHOUT having sex as part of the union. Maybe that will help others understand a little better.

@freespeechfreelancer Donkeys, Cows, horses, or sheep - whatever floats your boat! LOL. I see your point, but remember, I am writing from...

Once again I will have to disagree in relation to my own personal experience. I had a woman in my life who I loved more than I think I will ever love again, but having sex with her was the most destructive thing I could have done. I loved her for who she was and wanted to be intimate with her in every way possible, and she felt the same, but had we never had sex, we would have never crossed that line of possessiveness that bordered sexual relations in her mind. People like her can love without making love, and are readily and deeply in love without a need for sex with that person, but once they have had it they burn violently with desire and coveting until they drive that person away.
It would have been best if we had never had sex, then I would still have my soul-bound, life-long companion without having hurt her.

@TaNtricLuNarMoNkey3 Thus I think platonic love is an important pert of life.

I have a post about the love of a life and soul mate issue. You might check it out and see what others wrote on that topic. I have always been intrigued by it.

@TaNtricLuNarMoNkey3 Once again I will have to disagree in relation to my own personal experience. I had a woman in my life who I loved...

And that is why it is so good and fulfilling to SHARE. I am on here to learn as much as share knowledge. I have never been in a situation like you describe, so I can not agree or disagree. It is definitely unique and maybe even unusual. Human beings are extremely sexual creatures, and it is only natural and even fairly "normal" that those of the opposite sex would be attracted to and desire to mate. And now we are seeing an upsurge in those of the same sex being attracted to and desiring the same.
What you describe almost makes it sound like she turned in to a beast once you slept together. And some people are actually looking for what you say turned in to a nightmare for you. But you obviously did not force yourself upon her, so there had to be some kind of mutuality and agreement as to the whole thing.

@freespeechfreelancer And that is why it is so good and fulfilling to SHARE. I am on here to learn as much as share knowledge. I have...

Yes, well, like I said we wanted to have sex. We were attracted to each other but sex was not the most important thing to either of us. Sex, in the end, was not anywhere close to many of the other ways we expressed love for each other. Sex was lots of things to us and not necessarily only a means of bonding. But the rest of the things we did together were just that.

@TaNtricLuNarMoNkey3 Yes, well, like I said we wanted to have sex. We were attracted to each other but sex was not the most important...

I appreciate you sharing. I love when people say what they are thinking. It is the only way others can SEE what is in their head and/or heart. We can all learn something from one another - even in disagreeing.

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