How can a woman who has lost interest in sex be so selfish to not give it up to her husband who still desires it? Isn't that totally selfish?
I have friends who haven't had it for some 5-8 years because their wives aren't into it anymore. How can a woman say she loves her man but cut him off intimately and expect him to stick around and not resent her for it?
So, she should put out just cuz he wants it? Ahh, no.
Sex is more than a bodily function for Pete's sake. It's a shared, intimate experience. If she is shamed into having sex, it becomes no more meaningful than taking a dump.
There's usually a good reason for losing interest. Don't blame the woman, maybe the male is to blame as well. If a marriage depends on sex alone, then that marriage isn't worth saving. They should seek counseling.
I agree 100%. I think that's why a lot of marriages fail, once the honeymoon is over, and the day to day life begins, marriage isn't what they expected.
I agree, it's a team effort and if something is lacking then it's on both of them, sex is not the foundation of marriage but is key to a happy and fulfilling one.
Wedding cake has that effect sometimes. Don't know what they put in it.
Damn it Oz you're scaring me, I'm starting to fear this fate.
No need for anonymity, simply a question for the married users to confirm or deny if the no sex after marriage stereotype is true
How can you cure an Irish nymphomaniac? Marry her. (bah-dum-cha)
It's never been years in my marriage (at least not yet) but it can be months. We've talked about it and to be honest I don't really understand the reasons. She can assure you that you're loved but at times it certainly doesn't feel that way. The only thing I can do is keep the lines of communication open.
'Many people have been in similar situations'.
Suffice it to say, I can attest to the truth of that statement.
In other words you're saying you're fine with it now and it doesn't bother you as much as it would in the past.
That I agree on, for most men sex is a physical need, a lot of women dont understand that as well as we dont often understand that sex is a lot more emotional and mental for women
Men need to use the same wooing methods in marriage as they use outside marriage. It is 90% on them to make it happen.
However ejaculation for men is like other elimination needs and those who deny that are, well, in denial. Men must ejaculate or they become aggressive and bitter.
Women who achieve orgasms regularly are happy and healthy. If her partner is not putting her needs before his own he is a cad. If she is not willing to facilitate his ejaculate then she either doesn't understand the need or she doesn't belong in a heterosexual relationship. Intercourse is nice but love and support for the necessary biological functions of sexual ejaculation should be part of all heterosexual relationships.
Yes, but the personal relationship has to be in good shape for the things you describe to happen.
Otherwise, they won't feel like it, or at most, just go through the motions.
Yep
Agreed. It doesn't help. I said it happens, not that it's good or fair, it is what it is.
I guess you've not had to go for a long time without an orgasm or you would know that.
For clarification, Vic, I assume you mean an orgasm provided by another person.
Otherwise, no one need go for long without one, unless there is some functional disorder.
I have heard that some partners make it difficult. Shaming or otherwise interfering. Providing a safe and loving environment for masturbation is the very least a partner can do if (s)he is unwilling to participate.
Participation can be physical, it can be a fantasy tale, an striptease, shared viewing of videos or simply privacy without judgment.
But sneaking around trying to choke a chicken when no one is looking is more stressful than necessary in a loving relationship.
Well. gee, I find it hard to imagine someone who doesn't want to have sex being such a dog in the manger that they would also object to the deprived partner pleasuring themselves, but still regard the relationship as loving.
Sounds like something John Harvey Kellogg might have done.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/J...ion_prevention
Or both of my brother's ex's
But since they are ex's, the relationships must surely have ceased to be loving at some point, and maybe the objection to wanking was really just another excuse for complaining. Unless of course the wanking preceded the loss of interest in sex.
I've known several girls that were more than a little bit hurt to discover that their S.O. spent more time with porn than they did making love with them.
Perhaps.
Assuming the man can squirt, he pretty much needs to - every day. His partner should either help or at least make it easy for him to achieve that without shame.
Every man who can still squirt needs to do so once a day, on average?
I've read that the average is more like 3 times/week, and less than that past the age of 50.
https://health.spectator.co.uk/...l-ages-of-men/
Good for you. Every other day.
Once a year on your birthday doesn't cut it.
Rejoice, Vic! Tonight's the night!
Happy Birthday Thinker
Yep.
There is making love. But there is a biological need to squirt. Keep that in and it causes as much street as holding in a poop.
Might seem gross or non-romantic because it is. Male ejaculate is both a bodily function and a potential source of offspring. Sadly many women and some men don't (Or won't) get this.
Amen brother.
Lol it's funny and sad at the same time
That's why its both of those at the same time. What was the absurd decision of not too long ago? Uae in charge of women's rights?
Glad I'm still having sex regularly after 40+ years of marriage. Some nights, my wife even joins in.
Are you serious? First of all: No one owns anyone's body..even spouses.Second of all, I notice you are blaming the woman, because of course men are OWED sex, right? How awful and "selfish" would a man be if he didn't whip his pants off any time his wife wanted to? I don't know about you, but I certainly would never,ever want to be having sexual relations with anyone who didn't want to be involved. Also, marital rape DOES exist. A marriage license is not a free for all on your spouse's genitalia. Life happens. We are not machines. There is NO reason to put this kind of garbage thinking forward. No one owes anyone their bodies.
The first two options aren't mutually exclusive. People have the right to be selfish.. especially when it comes to their own bodies.
If a woman wants no sex that is that. For me it was always painful, I am single and expect to be this way. A married man that isn't getting sex might want to get divorced, i wouldn't blaim him. . But cheating is not the answer.
I know of relationships that the *** continued long after love and affection was gone. Selfish? IDK
She has the right to refuse sex and he has the right to want it, if she refuses to put out he has the right to leave her, when the needs of two people together arent met the relationship is doomed. I would leave such a relationship. I dont think it's selfish but rather loveless and pointless to remain in such a marriage.
Im just using a term here, for the sake of not repeating the same word.
I think it's very selfish in the case where the man does not have ED and has a healthy sexual appetite for her to lose interest and quit showing the love. Does she expect him to feel good about himself and not look elsewhere? If you don't want
What happens in the sex life of another womans relationship is not my business to resolve or complain about.