Alfred E. Neuman.
I cheated, I took the spy name quiz:
That's right, you take yourself so seriously that you, in fact, have TWO spy monikers and not just one! Known the world over as "Agent Zero", or "The Marksman", or to smart@$$es everywhere as "Agent Zero AKA The Marksman", you are a tride and true American force of justice - or demise, depending on who's paying that day. Aside from your obsurd good looks and god-given ability to instantaneously strike a pose whenever a camera is within sixty yards, you specialize in seductively holding a gun and making the most infuriating of "spy faces" at your enemies. And despite what the academy said, you still can't figure out where everyone's obsession with ridiculously tight leather came from, as it is extremely limiting on the battlefield. But hey, at least you look good, right?
Nadia or Vanko "Brick Wall" Bolshevik
If there ever was a spy that literally no one makes fun of - it's you. Just the mention of your moniker, "Brick Wall", even if someone is simply talking about an actual brick wall - is enough to make any figure of espionage the world over double over into the fetal position and cry for their Agent M.
While most assume that your spy name comes from your uncanny resilience to physical pain, it actually comes from a once living agent whom's last words were "I was hit in the face with a brick wall" - when in actuality his cause of death was your fist. Aside from punching, you specialize in both concealing alcohol and using it as a deadly weapon. And don't get us started on what you can do with a burning cigarette... партия, Comrade!
Wondering why nobody said, Maxwell Smart. Am I just getting old?
Giacomo Casanova -
Come on! Tell me that's not a cool name!