doctorwho1011s avatar Jokes & Humour
5 16

I cooked my very first turkey with the giblet bag still inside! I only stuffed one end. redface smilie

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They know about the chopper thing, so that one is a no-go.

I guess most of them are on about my non-discrimination policy, when it comes to other human beings. Like bringing some friends over... My mom said:"She really is nice!" And I went... "Well she has a dick, so do you really want any more grandchildren or not?"

Shooting my finger with a BB gun.

More like what haven't I done?

I broke 3 bones in my foot being an ass and then proceeded to walk home on it, proving I'm equal parts dumb and crazy.

I was on crutches, which I hated, for 3 months. They called me 'hop-along Sally' the whole time because I found hopping preferable to using crutches to go up and down the stairs at my house. lol

Does that count?

my family still calls me "Grace" cuz im probably the least graceful person they've STILL ever met.... it started as a child though (i knocked over a lot of full beverages....and i still do that same damn thing)

I got lost and ended up in chequers