Guy Facts....

Guy facts
The Man Rules
At last a guy has taken the time to write this all down, Finally, the guys' side of the story.

(must admit, it's pretty good.) We always hear "the rules" From the female side.

Now here are the rules from the male side.

These are our rules!

Please note.. these are all numbered "1 "ON PURPOSE!

1.Men are NOT mind readers.

1. Learn to work the toilet seat. You're a big girl. If it's up, put it down.

We need it up, you need it down..

You don't hear us complaining about you leaving it down.

1. Sunday sports It's like the full moon or the changing of the tides.

Let it be.

1. Crying is blackmail..

1. Ask for what you want.

Let us be clear on this one:

Subtle hints do not work!

Strong hints do not work!

Obvious hints do not work!

Just say it!

1. Yes and No are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question.

1. Come to us with a problem only if you want help solving it. That's what we do.

Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.

1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument.

In fact, all comments become Null and void after 7 Days.

1. If you think you're fat, you probably are.

Don't ask us.

1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of the ways makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one

1.. You can either ask us to do something Or tell us how you want it done.

Not both.

If you already know best how to do it, just do it yourself.

1. Whenever possible, Please say whatever you have to say during commercials..

1. Christopher Columbus did NOT need directions and neither do we.

1.. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings.

Peach, for example, is a fruit, not A color. Pumpkin is also a fruit. We have no idea what mauve is.

1. If it itches, it will be scratched.

We do that.

1.. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," We will act like nothing's wrong.

We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.

1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, Expect an answer you don't want to hear.

1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear is fine..Really

1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to discuss such topics as FOOTBALL or

motor sports

1. You have enough clothes.

1. You have too many shoes.

1. I am in shape. Round IS a shape!

1. Thank you for reading this.

Yes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight;

But did you know men really don't mind that? It's like camping.

Pass this to as many men as you can to give them a laugh.

Pass this to as many women as you can -to give them a bigger laugh

ThePrinceofWaless avatar Jokes & Humour
7 8

Had to steal that one. Ha!

@Will_Janitor Had to steal that one. Ha!

See below, ↓↓↓ before you get any ideas.  hehe smilie

Mostly true...I sit here red-faced.

Ha! "Learn to work the toilet seat. You're a big girl. If it's up, put it down. We need it up, you need it down..
You don't hear us complaining about you leaving it down."

Rebuttal #1) -Both sexes do need the toilet seat down at times, in order to most comfortably use it. Both sexes can also experience the unpleasant awakening of sitting on the rim and halfway falling into the toilet, when they are half asleep and need to use it.
-The seat needs to be down, in order for the the lid to be down. The toilet is often flushed. Due to the phenomenon known as a "toilet plume", it is best for the lid to be down when germs don't spew into the air and land on other objects in the bathroom.
-If there are animals in house, leaving the seat and lid up could result in them drinking out of or falling into the toilet. This would not be very good, for either the animal or their human.

In conclusion...there are better arguments all around, for the toilet seat and lid to be down. I do applaud the men who actually lift it before peeing, though. biggrin smilie

The blighter who "wrote this all down",
Is clothed in a hospital gown.
His chances of living
Cause doubt and misgiving;
Pay heed, all ye men of the town.  biggrin smilie

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