Alcohol should be sold in Capri Sun packets. Then you know you've had enough when you can't get the straw in anymore, amirite?

I aint drinking outta a little teeny straw

That won't happen cause kids would get into it. In past decade people had enough common sense to lock things up or even teach kids to keep out of things. I think it started when they no longer allowed people to smack kids who got out of line.