+60 Break up texts are fine if you're not married, amirite?

by Shemar93 6 months ago

Ex 3 years dating: "lmao break up you bye" OP: reasonable

by gladysfisher 6 months ago

Ex: "You've been upgraded to ex-boyfriend status. Congratulations on the promotion!" OP: "Acceptable."

by Anonymous 6 months ago

Ex: Hey, sign these divorce papers. OP: UNACCEPTABLE!! *loads gun*

by Anonymous 6 months ago

Yeah, I agree with OP to an extent, but if the relationship has been going on for a while, you share mutual friends, etc., then a discussion is warranted. That being said, I don't understand how ppl think that if they went out with someone once or twice, then they are owed a proper break-up. That almost feels like some kind of power struggle.

by Anonymous 6 months ago

This is more my general point

by Shemar93 6 months ago

Yeah, imo it's more relevant to how deep it goes, not how long you've been together, obviously the longer it's been the deeper you're likely to he but it's not a direct correlation.

by Anonymous 6 months ago

OP is 16 and has not been in a relationship longer than 6 months.

by Kennediward 6 months ago

Is CBA "can't be arsed"?

by Anonymous 6 months ago

Yes

by Medium-Task 6 months ago

Cost benefit analysis

by Objective_Office_107 6 months ago

Cousin Better Arrangement

by Anonymous 6 months ago

Depends on the type of relationship. If it's been only a few weeks, then fine. If it's been longer than a few months or you've gone public, you should at least do it in person. Obviously, exceptions apply, but I feel that telling someone face to face should be the bare minimum.

by Anonymous 6 months ago

I'd rather be told by text that someone thinks it's time to part company and then be offered a chance to talk about it afterwards.

by Anonymous 6 months ago

Yea sure but even when you've been dating for 1 year? 10? Text still good?

by sipesesteban 6 months ago

dating for 10 years is insane work

by kieramurphy 6 months ago

I prefer a fax

by Anonymous 6 months ago

If you want to break up with me, send it by mail and I'll get back to you in 3-5 business days.

by Separate_Can 6 months ago

I had a voicemail once

by MacaroonRound 6 months ago

Your fault for not answering the phone

by Anonymous 6 months ago

i want my breakups 3d-printed actually

by Adorable_Extreme8218 6 months ago

I would prefer that too, but the only fax machine I have access to is at work, and I'm not the one who monitors it, so that could get awkward.

by Anonymous 6 months ago

Ooh, I'll go WWI era carrier pigeon.

by Anonymous 6 months ago

I'm gonna use cave paintings next time.

by Anonymous 6 months ago

I would honestly respect tf outta that lol

by Elijahtowne 6 months ago

found the german

by Lower_Soup 6 months ago

Accurate

by Anonymous 6 months ago

Saw a guy for 5 weeks - he wanted me to drive all the way out to his work so he could break it off. I would've been pissed. Perfectly happy to have gotten him to text me instead of wasting more of my time

by Davontelarkin 6 months ago

I agree to in certain circumstances. I was seeing a girl for a couple of months and things had kinda fizzled, just from us having different vacations we'd already planned and not seeing eachother for a few weeks. We made plans to grab brunch on morning, so I pick her up, go spend $100+ on brunch for 2, get back to drop her off and she hits me with "I don't think this is working out." Ma'am, this could have been an email.

by Legitimate_Weight_47 6 months ago

It's the $100 that bites. Like I wouldn't help thinking "you just wanted another nice free meal, didn't you?"

by AdTerrible1228 6 months ago

Some people really can't handle confrontation of any kind… but unfortunately they thus create situations in which they are way bigger assholes than they woulda been otherwise.

by AdTerrible1228 6 months ago

I find that to be why people like to break up over text though, they don't want the confrontation or they lack courage. Like not even a phone call? There's a small percentage of scenarios I think a text would suffice though

by Beginning_Victory981 6 months ago

I think any serious relationship requires an in person breakup. No one does it in a restaurant, that's a movie trope.

by Giannideckow 6 months ago

I feel like if you arent adult enough to handle that people have emotions (which is what i am assuming this is about - you don't want to deal with people reacting), maybe you arent mature enough to be in an adult relationship. That being said, exception to any of this for me are abusive relationships. You don't owe an abuser any conversation or even a text message.

by Flatleykade 6 months ago

But better than nothing.

by Anonymous 6 months ago

Presentation of divorce paper work signed also count as a "break up text".

by Anonymous 6 months ago

Man, this is somewhere i have a strong disagreement with people. If i get dumped over a text message or phone call, i feel disrespected.

by Ok-Location 6 months ago

Seems kinda cowardly.

by beichmann 6 months ago

It makes them uncomfortable to break up with someone in person, and since they value their own comfort over the feelings or emotions of their supposed lover, they invent reasons to not have to. "I don't want to have to take her out to dinner to dump her, that's just silly. I can barely afford rent. Texting has to be more reasonable than that! I'll just text her."

by beichmann 6 months ago

Why do you want to waste more money in something that is dead ??

by Anonymous 6 months ago

The cowards way is often unpopular πŸ˜†

by Anonymous 6 months ago

Only reasonable answer. If long distance, at least a phone call or discord/webcam caller service in todays world. Face to face is key.

by Anonymous 6 months ago

I feel like it depends on the situation, like multiple years (4+), or if you have to exchange stuff. Would be easiest if meet up to break up also was returning stuff, so they didn't have to at a later date.

by Anonymous 6 months ago

Imagine being married and getting a "I hope this message finds you well…"

by Anonymous 6 months ago

Nah, a text is flat out cowardly.

by Anonymous 6 months ago

Only if you're a total coward and care nothing for the other person.

by Anonymous 6 months ago

Unless there's some form of threat just be an adult and do it face to face. Anything else is immature.

by Anonymous 6 months ago

Maybe OP's exes were nervous considering his weaponry.

by Anonymous 6 months ago

Yikes. Holy red flag, Batman.

by Anonymous 6 months ago

Well I'd have to respectfully disagree. I don't need to get dressed up, but if someone is going to break up with me then tell me they need to tell me something and if I can meet them. At least that will indicate to someone that it isnt going to be an occasion to get dolled up and they'll get an idea of what it is. I feel a text is a coward way out. Like most people already love to hide behind their phones and fail to properly communicate. I don't want to perpetuate passive aggressive behavior

by Halvorsonorrin 6 months ago

I personally don't think it's right to break up with someone you've been with months/years over a text. Being invited out to eat is crazy, but I'd at least like if you could look me in my eyes and tell me you're done. Kinda cowardly/immature imo to do it over text

by Beginning_Victory981 6 months ago

Why? So you can make a scene?

by alvisschmidt 6 months ago

…Is that what I said? Projection much? Who made a scene when you broke up w them and why can't you let it go? πŸ˜‚ I think any serious conversation needs to be had in person, and I find that breaking up after months/years to be a serious conversation. Go take your misery somewhere else

by Beginning_Victory981 6 months ago

πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚βœŒπŸ˜˜

by alvisschmidt 6 months ago

I think length of time and how deep the relationship went is a better judge of whether text breakups are fine or not lol

by AstronomerActive 6 months ago

For a few months, it's fine, but past that, it's something else.

by thompsontelly 6 months ago

The relationship hasn't been deep or truly meaningful if a break up text feels fine.

by Known_Selection_4965 6 months ago

If you're a coward.

by Anonymous 6 months ago

OP got dumped at a nice restaurant

by Anonymous 6 months ago

Agree. But maybe not for relationships that have been years long. Less than a year is not serious. I'm sorry. If you can fall for someone and then fall out of love with someone in just a few months then it was never that serious.

by Anonymous 6 months ago

This just perpetuates our throw-away mentality as a society, and it's disgusting and sad.

by Anonymous 6 months ago

Id accept anything as long as it's not ghosting.

by Anonymous 6 months ago

Last time I broke up with someone we didn't have cell phones. It was awkward AF kicking her out of my dorm room. Texting would be better than that.

by Anonymous 6 months ago

To me, it shows poor character in a person. But it seems to be becoming more acceptable to younger people these days. Like, just meet up with the person and tell them point blank.

by Anonymous 6 months ago

lol i broke up with my high school sweetheart of 3 years on facebook by changing my relationship status to single

by Elijahtowne 6 months ago

I would say it depends on the relationship. If you've only been out on a few dates? Completely acceptable. If you've been together for a few months? If you were friends before dating you should probably end things in person, but if not a text is fine. Been together for 5+ years? Unless that's their preference that's pretty disrespectful.

by Anonymous 6 months ago

I broke up with my girlfriend in middle school via email. We ended up getting back together, and now we're married. To be fair, she did say that email was very well-written.

by Duncanzboncak 6 months ago

IMHO a breakup doesn't have to be dramatic or drawn out, but it should be in person if circumstances allow it (ie: you're not very far away). Unless the person did something truly reprehensible or something. It's just a matter of basic respect.

by Anonymous 6 months ago

Because that would be a divorce text.

by kleinmelody 6 months ago

I guess there's a point in a relationship before which a breakup text makes sense. But you're way off drawing that line all the way at marriage. People ought to be way past that point before they commit to get married

by Anonymous 6 months ago

Young people these days...

by leilani82 6 months ago

Maybe if you've been dating for a few months or less, but in a serious relationship that just shows you have zero respect for your ex. If you actually cared about them you'd have the decency to do it in person. The only reasons I'd understand a breakup text in a serious/longterm relationship is if your partner cheated, or is abusive and you're not safe around them.

by Anonymous 6 months ago

I totally agree. I don't understand why it's considered offensive... if the person I'm dating doesn't want to be with me anymore, I want to know ASAP. Why wait to meet in person, that's just wasting my time.

by Sensitive_Toe 6 months ago

I absolutely disagree. You have to break up with the person in the same medium as you have established regular communicated before. Ghosting is never acceptable If you have only communicated on social media or dating sites, saying no thank you on those is fine. If your relationship has moved to the texting phase, it's fine to text that it is over If you regularly speak by telephone, you owe them the courtesy of a phone call The only exception would be if you've met them in person. If you are in an established couple, you need to break up with them in person, unless you're concerned about your safety. If you've only been on a couple of dates, either text or phone depending on what your regular method has been. For those of you that were raised poorly, ghosting is never acceptable. It is ignorant, rude, and cowardly. Breaking up with someone, and firing someone professionally, are two of the hardest things a person has to do. Do them kindly.

by Anonymous 6 months ago

8 years over in a text. Sucked bad.

by Anonymous 6 months ago

You're definitely very young if you think it's acceptable. It's more of a respect thing I think. I won't invite you to dinner, but I will tell you to your face.

by olakin 6 months ago

how can you have goodbye sex if you don't meet up?

by bonniewill 6 months ago

I had a 2 year relationship end via a long text message. My response: πŸ‘

by Anonymous 6 months ago

She grew up to be a wonderful mother and my best friend! Also, it's my sister.

by Ysenger 6 months ago