-4I’m a big proponent of conceal carry and people’s right to defend themselves. I believe in 99% of cases, shootings by people defending themselves is justified. Today I saw an incident where a bail bonds-woman killed a man for no reason, and got acquitted. More
+12It is the day after St. Patrick's and speaking of the Irish, I would like to point out that Sinead O'Connor was absolutely right 16 years ago about child abuse and the pope, but so many people dismissed her because she was a woman who had the audacity to shave her own head, and they somehow found that more offensive than the church covering for pedophiles.
+1I paint and install drywall. I don't like it at all, it's just a job to me. Some woman I know, patched a hole in a wall for the first time supposedly and think she knows everything. She thinks she knows everything about everything but sounds stupid everytime she opens the mouth. Just a rant. I thought about telling her she knows nothing.
Little Kids with Bad Habits? There was this little kid who had a bad habit of sucking his thumb. His mother finally told him that if he didn’t stop sucking his thumb, he'd get fat. Two weeks later, his mother had her friends over for a game of bridge. The boy points to an obviously pregnant woman and says, “Ah, ha! I know what you’ve been doing!” Link: https://www.free-funny-jokes.com/funny-parent-jokes.html - Parent Joke 15
+7What Kind of Contacts ? A policeman stops a lady and asks for her license. He says "Lady, it says here that you should be wearing glasses." The woman answered "Well, I have contacts." The policeman replied "I don't care who you know! You're getting a ticket!" Link: http://www.adrivers.com/trucker-article.php?n=9
Listening And Speaking Years in Marriage ? In the first year of marriage, the man speaks and the woman listens. In the second year, the woman speaks and the man listens. In the third year, they both speak and the neighbors listen. Link: http://www.laughfactory.com/jokes/relationship-jokes/5
Family or Musical Records? A woman meant to call a record store but dialed the wrong number and got a private home instead. “Do you have Eyes of Blue and A Love Supreme ?” she asked. “Well, no,” answered the puzzled homeowner. “But I have a wife and eleven children.” “Is that a record?” she inquired. “I don’t think so,” replied the man, “but it’s as close as I want to get.” Link: https://www.free-funny-jokes.com/funny-parent-jokes.html
+2Maybe I can't keep a woman because I need a good Southern Belle. I'm tired of these city girls, amirite?
Wishing All a Happy, Smiling Valentine's Day ! Ready for a Joke ? Man: "Honey, on this Valentine's Day, I want to tell you something... I'm not rich like Jack. I don't have a mansion like Russell. I don't have a Porsche like Martin. But I do love you and I want to marry you." Woman: "Oh, dear, I love you too! What was that you said about Martin?" *** Link: https://www.rd.com/joke/hes-got-fast-car/
A woman was near death from a special kind of cancer. There was one drug that the doctors thought might save her. It was a form of radium that a druggist in the same town had recently discovered. The drug was expensive to make, but the druggist was charging ten times what the drug cost him to produce. He paid $200 for the radium and charged $2,000 for a small dose of the drug. The sick woman’s husband, Heinz, went to everyone he knew to borrow the money, but he could only get together about $1,000 which is half of what it cost. He told the druggist that his wife was dying and asked him to sell it cheaper or let him pay later. But the druggist said: “No, I discovered the drug and I’m going to make money from it.” So Heinz got desperate and broke into the man’s laboratory to steal the drug for his wife. Should Heinz have broken into the laboratory to steal the drug for his wife? Why or why not? (Heinz Dilemma)
Where's the Luggage? A woman goes to check in at an airport. She goes up to the lady at the counter and says: "I want you to send one bag to Miami, one to Los Angeles, and one to Minneapolis." The ticket lady replies: "But we can't do that!" The passenger says back: "But you did last time!" Link: http://www.airliners.net/forum/viewtopic.php?t=1209341
How can a woman who has lost interest in sex be so selfish to not give it up to her husband who still desires it? Isn't that totally selfish? More
0Finding a woman sobbing that she had locked her keys in her car... .., a passing soldier assures her that he can help. She looks on amazed as he removes his trousers, rolls them into a tight ball and rubs them against the car door. Magically it opens. "That's so clever," the woman gasps. "How did you do it?" "Easy," replies the man. "These are my khakis".