Mixed Up Gifts A young man wanted to purchase a gift for his new sweetheart's birthday and as they had not been dating very long, after careful consideration, he decided a pair of gloves would strike the right note: romantic but not too personal. Accompanied by his sweetheart's younger sister, he went to Nordstrom's and bought a pair of white gloves. The sister purchased a pair of panties for herself. During the wrapping, the clerk mixed up the items and the sister got the gloves and the sweetheart got the panties. Without checking the contents, the young man sealed the package and sent it to his sweetheart with the following note: "I chose these because I noticed that you are not in the habit of wearing any when we go out in the evening. If it had not been for your sister, I would have chosen the long ones with the buttons but she wears short ones that are easier to remove. These are a delicate shade, but the lady I bought them from showed me the pair she had been wearing for the past three weeks and they are hardly soiled. I had her try yours on for me and she looked really smart. I wish I were there to put them on for you the first time as no doubt other hands will come in contact with them before I have a chance to see you again. When you take them off, remember to blow in them before putting them away as they will naturally be a little damp from wearing. Just think how many times I will kiss them during the coming year! All my love. P. S. The latest style is to wear them folded down with a little fur showing." *** Link: http://jokes4all.net/car-jokes?p=29
Black Christmas More
Christmas/New Year holidays are approaching. Are you excited about it?
What Does the Night Sky Tell You ? Two adventurers John and Jack were hunting for gold in the desert. After roaming all day long under the hot sun, they set up their tent and fell asleep. Some hours later, John woke up his friend. "Jack, look up at the sky and tell me what you see." Jack looked up and replied, "I can see millions of stars." "What does that tell you?" asked John. Jack thought for a minute and said. "Astronomically speaking, it tells me that there are millions of galaxies and potentially billions of planets. Astrologically, it tells me that Saturn is in Leo. Time wise, it appears to be approximately a quarter past three. Theologically, it's evident the Lord is all powerful and we are small and insignificant. Meteorologically, it seems we will have a beautiful day tomorrow. What does it tell you?" After a moment of silence, John spoke. "It tells two things to me. First is that... you are an idiot." Jack looked at John, surprised. "Why do you say so?" he said. "Because it has still not occurred to you that someone has stolen our tent." replied John. Link: https://unijokes.com/friendship-jokes/4/
0I would just like to thank all the haters for the recent attention, it feels so nice, that you go through all the trouble of being sock puppets just to react and follow me, I never realized, I was so important to you! Thanks for giving me such a big honor as your attention and time!
A Cooking Alternative ? How To Cook A Turkey: Step 1: Go buy a turkey Step 2: Take a drink of whiskey Step 3: Put turkey in the oven Step 4: Take another 2 drinks of whiskey Step 5: Set the degree at 375 ovens Step 6: Take 3 more whiskeys of drink Step 7: Turk the bastey Step 8: Whiskey another bottle of get Step 9: Ponder the meat thermometer Step 10: Glass yourself a pour of whiskey Step 11: Bake the whiskey for 4 hours Step 12: Take the oven out of the turkey Step 13: Floor the turkey up off of the pick Step 14: Turk the carvey Step 15: Get yourself another scottle of botch Step 16: Tet the sable and pour yourself a glass of turkey Step 17: Bless the dinner and pass out. Link: http://www.theholidayspot.com/thanksgiving/jokes.htm#5ehcuiUWZC11IcyO.99