Why is that so many girls believe guys are masturbation machines? I mean it's not as if they masturbate 500 times a day. It's more like 20 times daily. amirite?
The difference between a cat and a comma is that one has claws at the end of its paws and one is a pause at the end of a clause. amirite?

That's like saying the difference between dogs and marine biologists is that one tags whales, and the other wags tails.

those songs or phrases you learned when you were little that helped you remember something in school, still help you today, amirite?

A, B, C, D... that song comes in handy a lot.

People complain too much on airplanes. like "For real? I cant get hi speed internet?! AND MY CHAIR DOESNT LEAN BACK!" .... "Dude, you are sitting in a chair... IN THE GOD DAMN SKY!", amirite?
@B747 This isn't original, louis ck said it first

Yes, but since when is the post of the day an original thought?

"Thanks" is one of the worst possible responses to "I love you", amirite?

The worst response I can think of:

"What a coincidence! My other boy/girlfriend told me that the other day!"

I'm not skinny, but I'm not fat either. I have curves and I look healthy and yet every guy in school seems to go after that one annoying chick who looks like she hasn't eaten for days, amirite?

Well maybe that's because that other girl is cheaper to take on dates since she doesn't eat at all.

Why test on animals when we've got pedophiles in prison? Amirite?

I bet the kid was asking where were their civil rights when they were being felt up by the pedophile... now the pedophile is asking where their civil rights are when they're being used as lab rats. Kinda ironic.

What's the point of have things cost $9.99? Just make them $10. Nobody cares that they have to spend an extra penny. amirite?

It's a psychological thing that department stores do... when people see prices that end in an odd number, they believe that item is at bargain value. When people see prices that end in an even number, they believe the item is of quality value. Which is why at grocery stores, you see tons of odd number pricing and at fancy restaurants, you see even number pricing.

It is not a lack of love, but a lack of friendship that makes unhappy marriages. amirite?

Or a lack in love potion?

They should make a pig that sheds it's skin like a snake, so we wouldn't have to kill them for food, amirite?

I think the joke here would be that you would have an unlimited supply of footballs...

When someone knocks on the door of a bathroom stall that you're in, checking if it's occupied, almost every response that flashes in your head seems like it would be either weird or awkward to say. Its like, "I AM CURRENTLY SHITTING IN HERE". amirite?

I usually say "There's room for one more."

math past grade 4 is pretty useless unless you're going to be doing something math related with your life, amirite?

Grade four is shapes and addition, you're gonna need a lot more than that in the real world.

In a way, cheating makes sense if you're a teenager in high school. If an extremely hot person wants to have sex with you, then you might as well do it if you want to because it's highly unlikely that you'll stay together with your current partner and get married. Why miss out on the opportunity of a lifetime, amirite?
@It's not a life philosophy, but rather a relationship philosophy. And it describes an extremely small portion of...

Well you kinda contradicted yourself there... and other people on here are just reacting negatively to it because their sense of morality is higher than yours.

Sometimes you have a bad habit of spending all of your extra money on food, amirite?

And cheap hookers...

When you simplify a sport, it just doesn't sound as fun, (track: running in circles) amirite?

Nascar: Same concept, except with race cars.