The ability Thick Fat totally comes from Santa, amirite?

Santa claws in chimneys

Male pseudohermaphrodites technically have a negative dick size, amirite?
@404ChompyNotFound Pretend like I don't know what that word means..

Pseudohermaphroditism is a condition in which an individual has a matching chromosomal and gonadal tissue sex, but mismatching external genitalia.

You could hear 1,000 jokes and not remember any of them when you wanted to retell one but remember every single one when you heard them told again. amirite?

You can remember anything when you are told it again?

You find nothing wrong about a car you've bought until after you buy it, amirite?

That's because before you buy it, it's not a car you've bought.

You might have already taken the picture that is going to be used at your funeral, amirite?

This made my stomach drop👀

Putting down an animals that suffers is the "humane" thing to do, but in most cases humans with a condition that causes permanent suffering are kept alive as long as possible. amirite?
Drinking straws are going from plastic to paper, while toothpicks are going from wood/natural to plastic, amirite?
@Sharag They are? I haven't seen many plastic toothpicks.

I still have a box of them from the 90s. Never used them

We always talk about dick size, but never width or height. amirite?
There are more Hawaiian pizzas sold outside of Hawaii than there are in Hawaii, amirite?

1.4m population vs 328m

And that's just the US

Humans are the only dominant species that bitch about their existence. They're also the first dominant species capable of bitching about their existence. amirite?

How do you know?

When a drug addict accidentally overdoses, it is literally user error. amirite?

Actually it's user intention

In chess, the king never actually dies, amirite?
@Mrtechnohawk They're brothers and the war is a show so they don't get overthrown.

"King Alfonso! I have brought you your brother, King Sancho, as you requested!"

~El Cid Campeador

There'd be a lot less animals in the world if everyone was vegan. amirite?
@monsterallergies What do you think happens to them now? If the world went vegan we wouldn't be breeding more into existence. They...

So, we would control their population by breeding. Why would someone take care of them? Would we turn them lose into nature?

It's not weird when boobs are pressed against you while hugging, but it is if a dick is. amirite?
@Dairyqueenemployee on humans specifically because they're meant to be attractive. Lmao, no. Most likely they're permanent to signal...

to signal sexual maturity in a female human

Isn't that almost the same thing? Aren't "traits that signal sexual maturity/fitness" exactly the things that humans are hardwired to find sexually attractive?

If dogs had lifespans closer to those of a human (60+ years), then chances are, not many people would keep them as pets. amirite?