In Spanish, the word for "plug" is male (el enchufe) and the word for "socket" is not only female, but it's also a synonym for "female" (la hembra).
If you get my drift.
I did. But that might have been the Ex-Lax.
I get this a lot:
Stranger: "Are you okay? You look really sad/tired."
Me: "...That's just my face."
I hate it when people say, "I'm so OCD about this!" not realizing how debilitating OCD can be.
The mental illnesses most trivialized are probably ADHD and depression – the fault of psychiatrists overdiagnosing them and people thus thinking that they're just mild conditions. Everyone seems to forget that part of the definition of a mental illness it that it's pervasive and makes the person unable to lead their life normally.
"Humpty Dumpty" was originally meant to be a riddle. Nowadays, the answer is so well known that there's no point in treating it as such.
Well, it buys my antidepressants.
If I weren't asexual and forever alone: solve a 1000-piece jigsaw puzzle.
Soliloquy of the Solipsist
by Sylvia Plath
I walk alone;
The midnight street
Spins itself from under my feet;
When my eyes shut
These dreaming houses all snuff out;
Through a whim of mine
Over gables the moon's celestial onion
Make houses shrink
And trees diminish
By going far; my look's leash
Dangles the puppet-people
Who, unaware how they dwindle,
Laugh, kiss, get drunk,
Nor guess that if I choose to blink
When in good humor,
Give grass its green
Blazon sky blue, and endow the sun
Yet, in my wintriest moods, I hold
To boycott any color and forbid any flower
Know you appear
Vivid at my side,
Denying you sprang out of my head,
Claiming you feel
Love fiery enough to prove flesh real,
Though it's quite clear
All you beauty, all your wit, is a gift, my dear,
Atheism vs. the existence of a god (or gods) might be a more even match. But Christianity is so ridiculous that it's not really worth debating.
prepares for all the Christians to downvote this/rage at me
And some fall into a puddle and then get all crinkly even if you try to iron all the water out.
Yeah, but she's black.
I have friends?
"Breathe Me" by Sia
Yes, because crying should always be a poised, elegant thing.