"You might as well propose to me."
And if you want the joke to do really well, go ahead and stab the guy a few times, just for kicks and giggles.
The movie left so much out.
I went to the doctor and he told me I had to stop masturbating. I asked why, and he said, "Because I'm trying to check for testicular cancer!"
Monday: "I know the week just started, but I need your attention."
Tuesday: "I know you are still getting used to the new week, but I need your attention."
Wednesday: "I know it's Hump Day, but I need your attention."
Thursday: "I know the weekend is coming, but I need your attention."
Friday: "I know it's almost the end of the week, but I need your attention."
I hate you ignorant people who say that being hungry is a choice, when there is scientific evidence showing that it is clearly genetic.
Gotta love that pussy stench! Oh, wait. What did that say? rereads Oh, that makes more sense.
I like this girl.
That's so lame? Oh, right, getting detention is so UNABLE TO WALK! That cop gave you a ticket because he is so NOT ABLE TO USE HIS FEET! This party is so DIFFICULT IN BEING ABLE TO MOVE! Seriously people, pull it together, amirite?
Just don't let them touch your humps, or you will start some drama, and we don't want no drama.
But for once, the white guy has more gold hanging from his neck.
I'm sorry, could you repeat that for me?
July 4, 1776:
Thomas Jefferson: "And with that, we are a free nation!"
John Hancock: "We'd better change our accents, quick!"
I'm going to break my old iPod in half right now! No one try to stop me! I'll sell both halves for $1,000 a piece! I'll make millions!
All wizards are magical, but some wizards are more magical than others.