"You might as well propose to me."
I went to the doctor and he told me I had to stop masturbating. I asked why, and he said, "Because I'm trying to check for testicular cancer!"
The movie left so much out.
And if you want the joke to do really well, go ahead and stab the guy a few times, just for kicks and giggles.
Monday: "I know the week just started, but I need your attention."
Tuesday: "I know you are still getting used to the new week, but I need your attention."
Wednesday: "I know it's Hump Day, but I need your attention."
Thursday: "I know the weekend is coming, but I need your attention."
Friday: "I know it's almost the end of the week, but I need your attention."
Robert Robert? That DOES sound good.
I think it's a nice idea, but your wording would make anyone agree with you. What about a walk in the park? "Let's go get some unnecessary exercise and probably sweat a lot by walking in a public area where tons of noisy children will be around to bug us."
July 4, 1776:
Thomas Jefferson: "And with that, we are a free nation!"
John Hancock: "We'd better change our accents, quick!"
That's so lame? Oh, right, getting detention is so UNABLE TO WALK! That cop gave you a ticket because he is so NOT ABLE TO USE HIS FEET! This party is so DIFFICULT IN BEING ABLE TO MOVE! Seriously people, pull it together, amirite?
That's silly. The Honolulu Institute of Colorado doesn't have Quantum Mechanical Biology as a major!
No, this is a coincidence.
I know it'd be tough, but I think I could get by with just one million dollars.
Here's a crazy show idea. Well, you see, one average man marries and average woman. Sounds normal, right? But here's the crazy twist: they have SIX kids!
I hate you ignorant people who say that being hungry is a choice, when there is scientific evidence showing that it is clearly genetic.
No one is born free from problems. This is especially insulting to me because my parents both had anxiety and depression and I have schizophrenia. I believe I am allowed to have children. Besides, are you trying to create a problem-free "perfect" society? This sounds vaguely Nazi-ish.