"Absence makes the heart grow fonder" vs. "out of sight, out of mind," "it's the thought that counts" vs. "actions speak louder than words." Proverbs contradict each other way too often, amirite?

The real confusing part is that they're all true.

"Absence makes the heart grow fonder" vs. "out of sight, out of mind," "it's the thought that counts" vs. "actions speak louder than words." Proverbs contradict each other way too often, amirite?

That's so there's one for every occasion.

Animals have a soul as well as we humans. All you have to do is to look in their eyes and you can not deny they have a spot in heaven.

Sometimes I wonder what it's like to be on hard drugs.

You never actually got "The Talk" from your parents.

This was my "the talk":

Dad: son... don't be a whore.
Me: What the hell prompted that dad?
Dad: Fatherly obligations, son. Fatherly obligations...

THE END!
Credits
-Me
-Dad
--A special thanks to my dad, for going the extra mile on this one----

Seriously kids have way too much homework these days. I can't even help my daughter with her 8th grade Math! I think that teachers should teach more in class and expect less of the kids at home!
Anonymous -4Reply
As a kid you thought we'd all have hoverboards and spaceships by 2000AD. We're in 2012 and still not even flying skateboards - plus we've got Obama for another 4 years. Kinda anticlimactic!

I totally agree, when I was little and sat around thinking about hovercrafts and politics, I thought Obama would only get one term.

"Age is just a number," said the 48 year-old man in love with a barely turned 18 year-old, amirite?

My girlfriend's parents called me a pedophile because I'm 38 and she's 20.
It ruined our ten year anniversary.

Just the thought that your grandma or grandpa might still be sexually active is disturbing. Amirite?
It's good that more American soldiers now die from suicide than from battle, amirite?
@MusicIsAGift No because they suffer from PTSD and cannot get the proper care

You don't know what you're talking about; you're not a doctor.
So quit bullshitting everyone and spreading lies on the internet behind the safety of your computer screen.

Waking up to a massive spider with it's unholy demon spawn would scare the everloving shit out of you, amirite?
@Bun10 *You're

I believe he was introducing Seymour to his welcome, you see, it's rather fancy to word it like that actually. Much like a waiter saying, "Your caviar, sir."

Obama may be a very lovely family man, but when it comes down to it, there’s a father in Pakistan who loves his kids just as much as Obama loves his girls, and Obama killed that man’s children.

Yeah, I saw on the news some footage of Obama busting into Lahore with an AK-47 and mowing down some fathers.

The US electoral college should be retired. Instead, how about most votes wins!
It's better to be the first zombie than to be the absolute last survivor, amirite?

If you're the last one alive that means you win the game

Click "Yeah You Are!" to vote for Obama, and "No Way!" to vote for Rommey. Let's see who wins this! amirite?

Albus Dumbledore.