I feel like I owe you money or something for this superb-quality post...
Hogwarts: I WHIP MY STAIRS BACK AND FORTH I WHIP MY STAIRS BACK AND FORTH
@940361 (Etherial): Wanna know whats creepy... The fact that goldfish only have a memory of 5 seconds.
it's true! I have this friend who's a ginger and he actually talks without our permission.
"affiliated," that's a pretty big word for your type, eh blondie?
And then they name the album "*cHangIng lighTbUlbs w MAh gurLS **<3 <3 <3
Dude, turtles with dreads. That'd be fantastic
On the first day of kindergarten, I saw this kid and thought he looked like a turtle.
Only a cucumber? Meh. She'll be used to that kind of thing being shoved down her throat. Go for something bigger, like a giraffe.
Or a baby seal.
No, this is Patrick.
Morocco is in Africa, and in the desert region. That seahorse must be very lost.
or, better yet: "Hug you. Hug you to the candy store."
Jake, Jake, my dear Jake
I want to stab you with a rake
And dump your body in a lake
Or bake it in a birthday cake
I hope you get bitten by a snake
Your empty promises were so fake
You really made my poor heart ache.
I used to be just plain awful at The Sims 1 until I began using cheat codes. One time, I made a family of poindexters, the youngest child of which was named Kurt. Kurt, an annoying boy who constantly wore a birthday hat, got on my nerves to the point where I decided there was no other humane option than to kill him in the most gruesome way possible. First, I built a small swimming pool, locked him inside of it without a ladder, and left him there. He swam all night long, and when the school bus came the next day, Kurt miraculously overcame the boundaries and hopped right on out of the pool. After this failed attempt and my inability to slap Kurt in his birthday hat wearing, glasses covered face, I decided to lock him in a two square foot room with a plate of cookies and await his impending doom. Kurt stood there crying, passing out, and perpetually wetting himself for seven days, completely ignoring his plate of cookies. He then walked out unharmed.