It's sad how you had to put "not to be racist" in front of a non-racist post. Says a lot about society...
What would happen if you drove through chinatown?
And stabbing leaves of lettuce with forks after drenching them in an acidic vinaigrette is so humane.
Karma is coming to get me for laughing at that.
I'd like the priest with tourette's better. "And all god's people say-- JOHN SMITHS WIFE IS HAVING AN AFFAIR!"
You do realize that you wake up on your 18th birthday dressed completely in business attire, amirite?
Shall I give them an award? Would you like a prize? A monument perhaps?
Yes, a statue! Perfect. It shall be covered in gold leaf. Your image shall be worshiped! Beneath, the plaque shall read, "Anonymous, the man who had 57 people read his post." For CENTURIES, your image will be seen by millions -- NO! billions!-- they will weep at the feet of the statue.
Now all that's left is the pose... AH! I have it! You can spread your arms out, as if welcoming all people of the world into the arms of your omniscience. There shall be a small smirk painted on your glorious face. A wreath of olives will encircle your brow. Your trousers will have 57 pleats, so as to symbolize the 57 enlightened ones.
THIS WILL BE THE MOST GLORIOUS STATUE IN HISTORY!
and "yes, I have been flossing regularly"
Well I just failed the dirty mind test...
I'm judging your insides and all I see is risk for cardiovascular disease.
People on Dear Blank Please Blank and Six Billion Secrets need to realize this.
I really want to homepage this more than once.
What do you think I chase vodka with?
Perhaps it's because teenagers don't fill out censuses.
YEAH! We should also be able to play video games during school, talk on the phone during school, and leave class whenever we want, 'cause we don't go to school to learn or anything.