Works every time. After about twenty more ultra balls, that is.

Yay for motivational posters you see in classrooms and hallways! (Slight sarcasm, but they're actually true.)

Actually, my method was denying how much I wanted it, assuming that the game wanted to spite me.

Oh you young kids and your touch screens...(Late reply is ridiculously late)

There's always the classic and overused "the ceiling".

Well if it grabs it by the husk...

I'm sure there are plenty of people with virgin ears... (failpun)

Homework is short for homeroom work, silly.

Harry Potter is one of the few books where the battle between the 'good guys' and the 'bad guys' is actually realistic when in comes to casualties. Not only was the fight conclusive in the last book, but a bunch of the characters fighting for good died too.

"SHH. Do you hear that? That's the sound of forgiveness."
"THAT'S THE SOUND OF PEOPLE DROWNING, CARL."
"That is what forgiveness sounds like, screaming and then silence."

You guys realize that trolls love it when people freak out and take it seriously, right?

So people who are gay, overweight, or dress strangely can't be nice, normal, and attractive? I beg to differ.

The paper money is representative of the gold the country owns. So the more paper dollars we have, the less each is worth, unless we actually get more gold.

Oh yeah!

It feels gross...like I'm supposed to dissect a perfectly good book. Or a really uninteresting book, whatever the case may be.