About me.

This is the place where you learn about me.
Due to my narcissism and desire to elaborate on trivial things, my profile is rather long. For your convenience, it is neatly organized with customized subject titles. Just skim down while reading the titles in bold until you find a topic that might interest you. Or read all of it. Or don't. The choice is yours.

Material is subtly updated from time to time. The update could be a few paragraphs or simple punctuation.
[last subtle update: May 20, 2022]

Name: Austin. My mom got the idea for my name from soap opera credits.

I've had various nicknames on the internet over the years. Some more embarrassing than others. Here's a chronological list of them:
1) ausdaboss
This jewel was thought of when I was 11 or 12 and needed a name for ICQ chat.
2) Mr Jack
This was a song by my favorite band so of course it would make me a super original nickname.
3) NotSoDangerous
My first amirite nickname and also served as my handle for a few other sites.
4) Ozark
I used this name before it was a cool series on Netflix.
5) stickcaveman
I had the tattoo so why not the nickname?

YOB: 1989. That's three decades plus a few years.

Location: Kentucky & wherever the road takes me.

Languages: Englisch. Some Deutsch.

Race: Prefer not to disclose.

Amirite Related:
I've been here for a while. Too long if you ask some users. I think of myself as Amirite's historian. I recently logged on after an absence of 2 years. The site looks nice again.

-I've been a Professional Driver for 6 years. I've driven almost 1 million miles, traveled through 46 states, worked my way from company driver to instructor, and finally, I have owned my own truck for the last 3 years.

I have a very strong work ethic and have been working since before I was 14 years old. Work gives me purpose in my life.

Political Views: Strong hatred towards bi-partisan politics. I find it incredibly loathsome.

I base my decisions on one simple fact: The world is not black and white. I try to look at things as objectively as possible. I'm not perfect.

Choosing sides is not how we're going to solve our country's problems. I don't know the solution, but I do know that we'll get a little bit closer to one if we can learn to be reasonable with each other and find ways to compromise.

Religion: I was raised and confirmed Catholic but don't follow Catholicism.

I don't regularly attend church but when I do it's because church is a good place for me to zone out and think about things. It makes my parents happy as well. I still consider myself to be a Catholic because it is a part of my heritage. However, I do not believe in it from a philosophical standpoint.

I believe in a higher power but I don't believe in praying to it or worshiping it. I sometimes refer to "it" as 'God' to make things simple when having discussions. I put my faith into myself, everyone around me, nature, the Earth, the Sun, and the Universe. I don't know what will happen to my soul after I die but I sure hope it's good.

Music: I like a TON of music; so much that I'm not going to attempt to list it all. Music has enhanced my life more than any other form of entertainment. I love "discovering" new tunes. Even if they were popular over a century ago.

Special Skills:
+I'm a master at backing up and parallel parking using only my mirrors.
++UPGRADE: I can parallel park a semi-truck and trailer.
+++DOUBLE DELUXE BONUS POINTS: I can teach people how to parallel park a semi-truck... mostly by letting them figure it out themselves.
+I can make homemade gravy. It is the greatest thing ever.
+Finding happiness in the saddest of songs.
+Finding happiness in my occupation(s).
+Proud owner of a 1970 O'Day Mariner 19

Special Imperfections:
-I involve myself in too many hobbies at once.
-I daydream at the worst possible times.
-I start arguments only to get bored with them by the time I get a reply.
-I'm a bit naive.
-I often get so wrapped up in an activity that I forget to eat.

+Anything that makes me laugh
+Anything that makes me think
+Mechanical things
+DIY projects
+Commercial trucks
+Jeep Wranglers
+Boats, sailing, & nautical stuff
+Steam powered machinery

[these are just pet peeves, not hates.]
-Apple products
-The news
-Cats (allergic)
-Having sticky hands
-Being in large crowds

-People who tailgate while driving
-People who don't dim their lights on interstates

Amirite Related II:
*I use Amirite to exercise my debating skills. That being said, outside of the debate, I really don't give much of a shit about anything I'm arguing and neither should you. If I downvote your comment, suck it up. It's not a personal thing. Sometimes I simply disagree and have nothing more to say. If I don't respond to a debate we were having, I most likely got bored or just forgot about it.

Back when having POTD was actually worth something, I got five POTDs and they were my greatest accomplishments in life (other than driving a Freightliner Cascadia).
1st: http://amirite.net/545258
2nd: http://amirite.net/536285
3rd: http://amirite.net/412093
4th: http://amirite.net/591508
5th: http://amirite.net/705439
[After POTD value dropped:]
6th: http://amirite.com/756749
*7th: http://amirite.com/773271

Learn more about me:
If you'd like to read more of my ramblings, get to know me better, or ask me questions, take advantage of the following link(s)...

Follow me on Twitter: @stickcaveman

My Instagram username is: awkward4ustin

Story Behind Username:
I have a stick caveman tattoo on my right hip (sometimes shown in profile picture). Here's the FAQ:

Q: Is that really a tattoo?
A: Yes.

Q: What the hell is it?
A: It is in fact, a stick caveman.

Q: What is the meaning behind it?
A: Well, it all started with a comic I drew in high school. It was a battle between Caveman and Tarzan. Obviously caveman won because he’s not a rope swinging dumbass like Tarzan, who swung himself right into Caveman's spear. So Caveman was the one who had the honor of being tattooed on my body.

Q: Really?
A: Partially. It was something I wanted and so I got it.

Q: That’s a stupid reason to get a tattoo. Don’t you know that tattoos are permanent?
A: No shit? If you think it’s stupid, that’s great. Obviously I don’t think it’s stupid otherwise I wouldn’t have gotten it permanently drawn on my skin.

Q: Think of how it will look when you get old.
A: When I get old, I highly doubt my skin will be in such good condition that a faded tattoo will make it look any worse.

Q: Do you have any others?
A: Yes. A sun tattoo and a sailboat.