stoneonthewater

It's pretty hard to find a knock-knock joke that's actually funny. amirite?

Knock knock!
Who's there?
Little old lady.
Little old lady who?
I never knew you could yodel!

You hate it when people text you "k" because you're rarely in the mood to ever talk about potassium. amirite?

I hate when I text someone thanking them and they reply Np. I just thanked you, don't ignore it because you want to share your interest in Neptunium.

Your opinion on turtles? amirite?

I kinda love this post.

Before you get in the shower, you always end up doing stupid stuff in the mirror for like an hour, amirite?

One time, I made up a whole story and acted it out. I was standing in front of the mirror for like forty five minutes before I actually began my shower.

Is Willow Smith going to whip her hair during intense situations?
"I didn't pay my rent?" whips hair
"You're divorcing me?" whips hair
"I didn't pay my taxes?" whips hair, amirite?

"I'm bald?" *whips hai--"AW, MAN"

If you're planning to assassinate a British indie-rock band, Franz Ferdinand probably isn't your best bet, amirite?
You still wonder what happened to the Naked Brothers Band, amirite?
@1097225

I was wondering about this figuratively yesterday.

You wonder if Six Billion Secrets is going to change its name to Seven Billion Secrets when we hit that population this year, amirite?

I never realized why it was called "Six Billion" Secrets until now.

You love it when you're listening to a song are that corresponds to what you're doing at the time, e.g., listening to Poker Face while playing poker, listening to Under Pressure while under pressure, etc. amirite?

Once while raking leaves, I had a song on that said "Leaves are falling down on the beautiful ground" and I was like, "HELL. YEAH."

You know shit is going down when a guy uses a stall even if there are unused urinals, amirite?

LOL, says "POOPMAN"

You miss when GTL used to be an unnoticable randomized letter sequence in your soup. amirite?
It would be hilarious if you ordered a drink at a drive thru and when they handed it to you, you let it slip through your fingers and you burst into tears. Then when they give you another one, you do it again, then whisper "I'm so thirsty" and drive off. Amirite?

Why is this making me laugh so hard?!

Every good song has one dumb line: Firework-"Do you ever feel like a plastic bag?", Grenade-"Your eyes were open, why were they open?", amirite?

Or how about Eeenie Meenie? It's not really a good song (because of Justin Bieber) but Sean Kingston's opening line is "she's indecisive, she can't decide".

you cant help but laugh when gramma gets racist, amirite?

My dad's mom seems like she is. One time on Zoey 101, Michael (the black guy) shot a crumpled ball of paper easily into the trash can and she said "Of course he made that, they're all good at basketball." Then once she said something about Haitians "sitting under their trees and singing their songs". =_=

all the numbers under 10 seem to have a personality, 1 is a show-off, 6 is evil ect... amirite?

1 is a show-off, yeah. 2 is 1's strong best friend, even though she's a girl. 3 is jealous of 1 and wants to be 2's best friend, and they're friends, but not that close. 4 is a gay guy. 5 is a mean guy who makes fun of 4! 6 is 5's close friend who is sort of afraid of 5. 7 is 6's older brother, who has a crush on 8. 8 is 9's little sister, and 9 is a confused teenager who's torn between going to college and staying to take care of his younger sister.

o_o