A boy was at a carnival and went to a booth where a man said to the boy, "If I write your exact weight on this piece of paper, then you have to give me $50 but if I cannot, I will pay you $50." The boy looks around and sees no scale so he agrees, thinking no matter what the carny writes he'll just say he weighs more or less. In the end, the boy ended up paying the man $50. How did the man win the bet?

He wrote "your exact weight" on the piece of paper.

I have one thousand ears but can't hear. What am I?

A cornfield.

Whose life is more tragic, Harry's or Snape's?
@DW2 Actually did read all the books. Have you ever taken the online quizzes to see what house the sorting hat would put...

I'm a Hufflepuff. What does that have to do with anything? And you'd rather hang out with Snape, so therefore that makes him a "better person" by default? Why don't you try making a relevant argument for once, instead of talking nonsense?

Whose life is more tragic, Harry's or Snape's?
@DW2 Because I'm a Slitherin. :)

Blah blah house pride blah. Now then, are you gonna give me a convincing argument or nah?

The only honest info in newspapers nowadays are the day & date, amirite?

And the birthdays in the back.

This post is true.

Make another one where it says "this post is false," just to mess with people.

Guys: It would be so awkward if you we're marrying a girl named Stacy and the song Stacy's Mom came on during the reception, amirite?

Blame the best man.

Whose life is more tragic, Harry's or Snape's?
@DW2 Note: Harry's parents bullied Snape and made his life Hell. Was Snape suppose to "like and praise" the son of the...

Okay.

1.) Snape abused a student. But hey, at least he didn't murder said student! He MUST be a MUCH better person than the student he abused!

2.) Consider these two for a moment. Harry is the orphaned son of the man who bullied Snape and the woman he refused to get over. Snape, a thirty-something-year-old teacher, took this out on a teenage boy, a student, simply because of his parentage. I'm not saying Snape should have "liked and praised" him, but he could at least have been halfway decent instead of holding onto an immature grudge.

3.) Speaking of the grudge, he did not fight through it. Yes, he performed a few decent acts to save Harry, but he also knowingly made it difficult for Harry to not only make good enough grades to pursue his dream career, but to save himself and others as well. He had the world on his shoulders, and Snape knew this, but he insisted on putting his two sickles in just to make things harder. If Snape had been any sort of "better person" than Harry, he would never have made him even more stressed than he already was.

4.) Would YOU hold a grudge on a teacher who insisted on abusing you just because of events that occurred before you were born?

5.) What has Harry done that is SO REPREHENSIBLE that you consider SNAPE to be a better person? Perhaps you should READ THE FUCKING BOOKS.

Gotta hate that moment when you have some clever comment up your sleeve only to scroll down and realize everybody's already said it, amirite?
Bill's Mom Has Four Kids Penny, Nickel, And Dime What's The Name Of The Fourth Child?

Quarter.

Whose life is more tragic, Harry's or Snape's?
MMORPG ads are disgusting, amirite?
@Spillberg Ads are ads. You don't get to like them, they get to be annoying. . .

Ads aren't supposed to be "annoying" at all. They're supposed to attract audiences or consumers. If they're "annoying," they get nothing.

Given political equality, who is emotionally stronger in the standard relationship, men or women?
@fuzala I don't know what political equality means but it depends on the individual and what is meant by emotionally...

Because in the standard relationship, the man is expected to "treat the girl right" but nobody says anything about the girl "treating the guy right".

How many children did Harry have when he became Head Auror?
How many children did Harry have when he became Head Auror?
@1961175

From the books and interview material. The rest is simple math, really. Harry was twenty-seven when he was promoted and thirty-seven in the epilogue. Albus was obviously eleven and Lily nine. Therefore Albus was approximately one year old at the time of the promotion and Lily was born a year later. That makes two - James and Al.