+1,635Special occasions must be decided based on how scared people are of things. Trees only get one day. Sharks get a week. Black people get a whole month, amirite?
+2,630The new Karate Kid is basically just Jaden Smith's re-creation of his dad's old show. He was chillin out maxin' relaxin' all cool, shootin some b-ball outside of school when a couple of guys who were up to no good started making trouble in his neighborhood. He got it one little fight and his mom got scared, she said "You're going to learn kung-fu from the maintenance man downstairs.", amirite?
+2,248I like how ninja turtles wear masks, good way to hide your identity, its not like you're a giant fucking turtle or anything, amirite?
+6,608Toddlers are like drunk people. They are always falling over, they mumble complete nonsense, food never makes it all the way into their mouth, they get very loud when they dont get their way and they pee/poop themselves without any guilt. amirite?