Jesus can walk on water. Humans are 75% water. I can walk on humans. Therefore, I am 75% Jesus, amirite?

Makes sense.

by Anonymous 13 years ago

I think so...

by Anonymous 13 years ago

Wow. I think Dwight must've known this would be POTD.

by Anonymous 13 years ago

And if they just went swimming, then you're 80% Jesus.

by Anonymous 13 years ago

LOGIC

by Anonymous 13 years ago

what's the other 25%?

by Anonymous 13 years ago

Satan.

by Anonymous 13 years ago

oh shit...

by Anonymous 13 years ago

75% BLASPHEMY!

by Anonymous 13 years ago

HIGHDEAS.COM

by Anonymous 13 years ago

No, this is amirite.net.

by Anonymous 13 years ago

I think anonymous was telling what he thought was the source, but as Dwight is my friend and anonymous didn't have the guts to say it un-anonymous... be quiet little kiddie.

by Anonymous 13 years ago

http://highdeas.com/hd/So_jesus_can_walk_on_water

by Anonymous 13 years ago

Is that your favorite post? I really like this one: http://highdeas.com/hd/The_Crossroads

by Anonymous 13 years ago

that's why they said "HIGHDEAS"

by Anonymous 13 years ago

Oh, thanks.

by Anonymous 13 years ago

More specifically, http://amirite.net/638345

by Anonymous 13 years ago

Jesus can walk on water. Watermelons are 92% water. I can walk on watermelons. I am 92% Jesus!

by Anonymous 13 years ago

You can walk on watermelons? Now THAT is a miracle. I always loose my balance, with them being all rounded and rolly and all.

by Anonymous 13 years ago

Just cut them up. Walking on the slices is much easier.

by Anonymous 13 years ago

Seems legit.

by Anonymous 13 years ago

Twinkies are 98% air I can walk on Twinkies I AM 98% AIRPLANE.

by Anonymous 13 years ago

It's not as fun as it sounds.

by Anonymous 13 years ago

I'm hungry.

by Anonymous 13 years ago

Me too.

by Anonymous 13 years ago

I ate a ham and swiss sammich.

by Anonymous 13 years ago

I ate strawberries.

by Anonymous 13 years ago

by Anonymous 13 years ago

^ I posted this before it was POTD. Please don't hurt me Anthony?

by Anonymous 13 years ago

You are 100% crobat

by Anonymous 13 years ago

Chips?

by Anonymous 13 years ago

That's Zubat, silly.

by Anonymous 13 years ago

I think I'll get banned if I answer that......

by Anonymous 13 years ago

Why?

by Anonymous 13 years ago

Cuz of pidgeons wary

by Anonymous 13 years ago

...wha?

by Anonymous 13 years ago

stoner logic... love it

by Anonymous 13 years ago

*rubs forhead twice*

by Anonymous 13 years ago

*rubs foreskin twice*

by Anonymous 13 years ago

*genie comes out of foreskin*

by Anonymous 13 years ago

To be fair we're all a bit Jesus-y. He was a human, so are we.

by Anonymous 13 years ago

I can't walk on water. Neither can kangaroos. Therefore I am a cantaloupe.

by Anonymous 13 years ago

Cantaloupes can walk on water, though.

by Anonymous 13 years ago

But granite countertops cannot!

by Anonymous 13 years ago

Indeed, but a jeep, however, can.

by Anonymous 13 years ago

yucky :(

by Anonymous 13 years ago

by Anonymous 13 years ago

I am God, therefore I am %100 Jesus.

by Anonymous 13 years ago

I thought he was your son? Or are you cloning yourself up there?

by Anonymous 13 years ago

holy trinity, man

by Anonymous 13 years ago

That isn't even real.

by Anonymous 13 years ago

I can walk on carpet. Carpet is 0% water. Therefor, I am 0% Jesus... DAMN IT I FUCKED UP AGAIN.

by Anonymous 13 years ago

Trees are 90% air. I can climb trees. Therefore, I am 90% flying. And then I leap out of the tree with my wings spread and I'm 100% flying.

by Anonymous 13 years ago

since when were trees 90% air

by Anonymous 13 years ago

so if you're 75% Jesus, and you're 75% water, Jesus is 100% water. I DRINK 2 LITERS OF JESUS EVERY DAY. and I pee 1.5 liters of Jesus every day.

by Anonymous 13 years ago

That could be a cool phrase for saying you have to pee. "Brb. Gonna release Jesus."

by Anonymous 13 years ago

I just jesused my pants...

by Anonymous 13 years ago

http://failbook.failblog.org/2011/08/21/funny-facebook-fails-god-math/

by Anonymous 13 years ago

Dates. I saw this around but I don't really have a source.

by Anonymous 13 years ago

dwight's was posted two days before that

by Anonymous 13 years ago

http://highdeas.com/hd/So_jesus_can_walk_on_water

by Anonymous 13 years ago

u shuldnt b calling urself jesus its bad cuz u rnt him so fuk yew

by Anonymous 13 years ago

I think we might have a genius here.

by Anonymous 13 years ago

Can't tell if trolling or just very stupid.

by Anonymous 13 years ago

Nahhh this guy seems legit

by Anonymous 13 years ago

I'm surprised there hasn't been a comment about shoving religion down our throats. But since I said it, someone is going to.

by Anonymous 13 years ago

Here, let me do the honors. "I am a narrow minded bigot who practises intolerance and hatred as part of a supposedly peaceful loving religion. And your opinions are invalid and stupid because you blasphemed by saying you are Jesus. So you are going to hell, ok?" Haha. Satisfied? :)

by Anonymous 13 years ago

No I meant a comment complaining that people shove religion down their thorats.

by Anonymous 13 years ago

Ha! Bitch, I can walk on jellyfish.

by Anonymous 13 years ago

Hopefully you aren't attempting that without shoes. Those suckers hurt!

by Anonymous 13 years ago

The tops of them don't. Didn't you ever see Finding Nemo?

by Anonymous 13 years ago

Jesus can walk on water. Ice is 100% water. I can walk on ice. Therefore I am 100% Jesus!

by Anonymous 13 years ago

Voted up, signed in, then voted up again, well done

by Anonymous 13 years ago

damnlol

by Anonymous 13 years ago

I am intrigued by this post.

by Anonymous 13 years ago

Jesus can walk on land, I can walk on land, therefore I am 100% Jesus.

by Anonymous 13 years ago

Jesus has a beard. I do not have a beard. Therefore I am 0% Jesus.

by Anonymous 13 years ago

See this thread is what happens when you mix religion and science, makes no sense.

by Anonymous 12 years ago

Nice comparison

by Anonymous 9 years ago

Totally legit.. ..Totally

by Anonymous 4 years ago