Kids adhering to the same values and beliefs as their parents is not "brain-washing". amirite?

Sharing your family's values to the next generation isn't brainwashing, you're right. Tryiing to isolate children from other values systems and beliefs is.

by Anonymous 1 year ago

Or punishing them for having different viewpoints is also brainwashing.

by Silly-Elderberry 1 year ago

like punishing them for hitting others is brainwashing?

by Noconnell 1 year ago

No, punishing them for not believing that gay people are possessed by the devil, or not thinking that men are inherently better than women, or not believing that all <insert different race or religion> are terrorists.

by Silly-Elderberry 1 year ago

This is the take

by Civil-Competition 1 year ago

There are plenty of beliefs that are dangerous for children. It's ok to refuse them.

by Slow-Morning 1 year ago

Also, if the kid can articulate why they hold these values is important. "because mom/dad/the Bible/etc. said it was bad." Is brainwashing. If they don't know why something is bad. Or don't have the critical thinking skills and maturity to understand certain concepts, they can't form their own opinions. That is parroting and brainwashing.

by leonora32 1 year ago

Yes but with a caveat. Sometimes there's a why that kids just aren't intellectually developed enough to understand yet or put into their own words. Concepts like consent, charity, fairness, empathy, social contract theory, etc are all things I indoctrinated my kids in well before they could articulate why. I'm not raising selfish assholes until they're able to explain why it's morally wrong to be a selfish asshole. You do need to give them insight into the why and ultimately they need their own why, but sometimes the what comes before the why.

by Anonymous 1 year ago

On this point though, the age of the kid matters. A 5 year old saying that isn't necessarily brainwashing because a 5 year old can't really formulate a proper belief system of their own. They will just parrot the belief system of their parents or another trusted adult in their life. A 15 year old saying that is more concerning, and anyone over the age of 18 who's saying that has definitely been brainwashed

by Outside_Chance_1576 1 year ago

You really need a Bible to understand that things that cause harm, pain or distress to other living beings are wrong?

by Juanitablock 1 year ago

To a certain extent yes. Simply put because a lot of y'all believe in evolution therefore survival of the fittest. So from a survival standpoint what is wrong with doing anything you can to survive. Other animals do it so what difference is it for us? I'm saying this using y'all's logic

by Massive_Frosting5708 1 year ago

Also you are right a lot of religions have had some very awful people who abuse the power they gain from it. But I simply am stating why morals make sense to me and would like to inquire on why your morals make sense from a non religious point of view.

by Massive_Frosting5708 1 year ago

Empathy. I experience it, and it informs my decisions with regards to other people. I may not always be "right" but I've got a pretty good sense of what's wrong. And the god that is described in the Bible sounds like a selfish and deluded asshole to me

by Anonymous 1 year ago

Never said God indirectly told me but I just want to understand your belief system behind being a "good" person without the threat of punishment. I say this from complete neutrality and kindness. I am just genuinely curious to hear people's POVS.

by Massive_Frosting5708 1 year ago

Believing that evolution and survival of the fittest happens in nature as an objective fact is not the same thing as saying that it is a morally good ideology and guide for how you behave in a society insulated from nature (by and large).

by rodriguezfabian 1 year ago

Not allowing your children to challenge or question your beliefs and values is also brainwashing

by Anonymous 1 year ago

Perfect response!

by Adoyle 1 year ago

Forcing parental beliefs on children is brainwashing however. Or indoctrination I should say

by Anonymous 1 year ago

I would call it indoctrinatin if you're not teaching and preparing kis to think for themselves.

by Anonymous 1 year ago

What if the parent isn't trying to isolate them and they grow up in a homogenous culture?

by Anonymous 1 year ago

People shouldn't be isolated from other cultures either. A homogenous culture isn't brainwashing, but they're very rare...

by Anonymous 1 year ago

Homogenous cultures aren't rare at all, they're very very common. Most people tend to live around other people who are demographically like themselves.

by Anonymous 1 year ago

Depends on how you define culture. We live in an international, multicultural world these days.

by Anonymous 1 year ago

It depends. Were the kids given a fair opportunity and environment to believe otherwise? I'll agree that some people are too quick to call things brainwashing but you have to admit a lot of parents either force their beliefs on their children or don't give them an opportunity to believe otherwise. If a kid only feels safe to believe what their parents believe, that's brain washing. There's nothing inherently wrong with telling your kids what you believe and why though. Telling them is not the same thing as indoctrinating them.

by Anonymous 1 year ago

"I believe in X religion, and I'm gonna take you to my weekly religious service with me so you can learn about the religion too and eventually decide for yourself what's right for you." = Normal and healthy. "I believe in X religion, so I'm gonna put you in a school where only other X religious people go, not allow you to be friends with anyone who's not in X religion, only allow you to read and consume X religion media, tell you that members of any other religion are evil, not allow you to explore any other religion, not allow you to question X religion in any way, and threaten you with the withdraw of my love if you decide you don't want to be a part of X religion." = Brainwashing and abuse. Replace "religion" with any political party, group affiliation, belief system, etc. It's okay and normal for parents to share their beliefs with their children, and normally it's all totally healthy and fine. But some parents absolutely do take it a really extreme and dangerous level.

by Own-Sugar-295 1 year ago

Thank you, that's perfectly written what I wanted to say. This great.

by Anonymous 1 year ago

There's a difference between instilling your own values into your children and teaching them to reject opposing viewpoints and raising them to never be able to question YOUR beliefs.

by Anonymous 1 year ago

Agreed. And I'm a cleve audio dude.

by Adoyle 1 year ago

No. But these are the same people that think colleges are "brainwashing" their kids when in reality the kids are just experiencing life, people, and knowledge outside of their family confirmation biases. And realizing "oh, my parents were wrong about a lot of things."

by Anonymous 1 year ago

You're probably right.

by Adoyle 1 year ago

I've encountered plenty of asshole atheists in the wild. It isn't a high percentage of them, but they're just as arrogant about their religious stance as the in-your-face evangelicals.

by Anonymous 1 year ago

If kids are exposed to beliefs and then choose to adopt them, that is one thing. If they are forced into those beliefs or threatened with punishment or isolation from people who have different beliefs, that is brain washing. Whether it's racism, -phobia, religion, or other things.

by Anonymous 1 year ago

Well worded

by Adoyle 1 year ago

What's wild is that you always hear this idea that kids should be "protected" from the values and beliefs of their parents from childless people in their early 20s whose parents had exceptionally extreme beliefs that they actually adopted for some time... It's not coming from the average fully grown adult who simply had some disagreement with their folks, so did things differently.

by Anonymous 1 year ago

Great point

by Adoyle 1 year ago

Might not be brain washing but Its at least indoctrination if you're only teaching/showing the kid one side.

by Dry_Palpitation_2881 1 year ago

I don't teach my kids antisemitic beliefs. Is that brainwashing? I think other responses nail it. Preventing them from discovering other beliefs is problematic. It's not my job to teach them Hinduism, for instance.

by Adoyle 1 year ago

That's like that ridiculous gotcha of "you're also intolerant for not tolerating my intolerance" 🥴 And no, you don't have to teach them Hinduism, but don't teach them that Hindus are bad people or poor lost souls for not belonging to the same religion you do. And don't get angry if they want to learn about Hinduism. That also doesn't mean that you can't talk about specific concerns or criticisms you have about other world views, as long as you have actual arguments.

by That_Caterpillar_353 1 year ago

Well. There is a reason infants are introduced to religion. Imagine turning 18 and your parents introduce you to the biblical version of reality. How would that go ya think?

by Orlandgreen 1 year ago

I don't know. Interesting point.

by Adoyle 1 year ago

I'd be happy if the parents and political pundits who insist teachers are brainwashing students would just knock it off.

by Pitiful_Twist_3851 1 year ago

Hey, if I could brainwash students, I'd make them complete their homework and study for tests.

by Pitiful_Twist_3851 1 year ago

I don't think your political beliefs should be carried on celebrated. Everyone should come to their opinion in an unbiased environment allowing to do research and come to their own opinion Now obviously that's not a realistic scenario, therefore ur right it's not being brain washed for parents just being themselves around their kids. I just disagree it should be celebrated and purposely passed down

by Brave_Entry 1 year ago

I agree with regard to political beliefs, absolutely. I don't consider political beliefs a factor of culture.

by Adoyle 1 year ago

Well normal culture should obviously be embraced so I wouldn't consider that what people refer to as brainwash. I took this as people should be allowed to push their politics and religion on kids.

by Brave_Entry 1 year ago

Oh agree, nothing wrong with having ur child grow up religious (to an extent obviously)

by Brave_Entry 1 year ago

This seems like a rational observation. I think it is mostly the internet who says otherwise.

by Tall-Debate-6142 1 year ago

Just out of curiosity, what beliefs do you classify as inappropriate? And which do you think are not?

by Cody87 1 year ago

Arguing isn't a pretty dull hobby, my guy.

by AshamedSolution6970 1 year ago

I'm not arguing I'm genuinely asking because what he may find inappropriate would severely change what he is talking about, what if he's talking about teaching your children that being gay/trans is okay as inappropriate? I agree that it's not brainwashing to teach your children your values but OP put exceptions to that and didn't mention what they are, I want to know what those exceptions are to him because it would change my views on what he wrote.

by Cody87 1 year ago

It is when parents discourage/prevent their kids from learning as much as they can to form their own opinions. I share many opinions with my parents, but they raised me to read as much as I can, and learn as much as possible, and to form my own opinions based on the information I gather, not just what other people tell me.

by Tight-Librarian 1 year ago

Well if kids never get the chance to explore outside of their parents beliefs, then that definitely goes towards brainwashing territory

by Exciting_Photo_9956 1 year ago

If They choose to that of Their Own Decision? Of course not.

by Anonymous 1 year ago

I think you are trying to refer to indoctrination.

by ExcellentAardvark135 1 year ago

It's not an issue if you allow them to interact with different views and beliefs. It's brain washing it become isolating and they are not allowed to think any other way

by Anonymous 1 year ago

It's always important to know and appreciate your roots so I wouldn't call it brainwashing. But when you're literally teaching your kids to hate and shield them from the world it's going to cause problems (ex: Westboro Baptist Church). People exist, deal with it.

by Anonymous 1 year ago

If they can't question those beliefs and those values & are villainized for it, yes it is brain washing because you're telling them that is not ok to have different beliefs or question those beliefs because they're different than yours.

by Zestyclose_Lab 1 year ago

Outside of the terminally online bubble this is not an unpopular opinion

by Anonymous 1 year ago

Nuh uh. Kids are supposed to believe things unaccountable people on the internet say, not their stupid parents.

by Anonymous 1 year ago

You shouldn't be allowed to take anyone under 18 into a church, honestly If it's about taking responsibility for the ultimate fate of your immortal soul then it seems it should require the same level of responsibility as selecting a sex parter

by Anonymous 1 year ago

Most people responding seem to think children should be free to explore religion. But you think it should be restricted from them? Or just the building?

by Adoyle 1 year ago

It is if they teach their kids to eschew critical thinking, reason, logic, mathematics and the sciences.

by howellreymundo 1 year ago

I've heard it from people in the education system. And then they wonder why parents fall for those bogus "parents rights" groups

by Weekly_Albatross 1 year ago

I have never heard people call that brainwashing

by GardenFearless 1 year ago

I mean I agree...but also it kinda is brain washing...like not in a bad or malicious way. We're just creatures who grow and tend to learn habits from those closest to us during our formative years. Generally this will include parents. That's not to say we shouldn't want or expect our children to grow into their own people, but really everyone starts somewhere. Do your best to do right by your kids and don't start them behind everyone else.

by Kuhlmanlempi 1 year ago

boooo. Popular opinion

by xlittel 1 year ago

I'm looking at it from the other side. It's disgusting that RELIGIOUS people indoctrinate their beliefs onto children. Threatening with hell and forcing them to believe, forcing them to go to church/mass.

by Unable-Tear 1 year ago

Raising children is brainwashing.

by Electrical-Pin 1 year ago

This seems to be where all roads are leading in the conversation lol To be fair, I use tiny muffins to convince my daughter to do anything. I'm the problem

by Adoyle 1 year ago

Children literally don't know things. Their brains are malleable. Teach them good things or bad, their brains don't actually have anything to wash.

by Electrical-Pin 1 year ago

You just don't get it. People who believe every single thing I believe are open minded and good people. People who don't are closed minded and brainwashed. It's not complicated.

by Anonymous 1 year ago

Yup. Tis the way it be. Funny. You never hear someone say "hey I believe those people did their research and soul searching and came up with wildly different values than me." The other side is always "brain washed." It's so boring

by Anonymous 1 year ago

it is when the values are based in misogyny and colonialism.

by Anonymous 1 year ago

Interesting

by Adoyle 1 year ago

Yeah

by Anonymous 1 year ago

It is brain washing if the values and beliefs do not follow logic or rationale and is biased towards a single line of thinking.

by Critical-Kangaroo 1 year ago

I think you just don't like religion, and that's okay.

by Adoyle 1 year ago

✌️

by Critical-Kangaroo 1 year ago

It literally is indoctrination though…

by Anonymous 1 year ago

If it is, then it's impossible to avoid. Can't leave your kid with a babysitter anytime you are participating in your religious or cultural practices.

by Adoyle 1 year ago

Tradition is not bad, what its abhorent is indoctrination and forcing beliefs in a kid beyond the most basic stuff in moral and education to function in society, and even that once they grow is up to them I never heard someone claiming that no one should have the beliefs of their parents. In fact im not evne sure its statistically possible

by Remarkable_Plane 1 year ago

Whatever I don't like is brainwashing.

by Complete-Taste-210 1 year ago

Reject inherited cultural dogma in general. Be your own person. Except for food, retain the food and bring more.

by lora17 1 year ago

Depends if they came to the same conclusions themselves eventually through critical thinking or if they simply accept their parents values and beliefs as fact. I highly doubt organized religion would exist without parental indoctrination instead of letting kids explore religions for themselves.

by Anonymous 1 year ago