+30 Marrying your high school sweetheart is probably the best emotional and financial bet you can make in your life, amirite?

by Accurate_Leg_8319 1 week ago

Unpopular indeed

by Unable-Race-9158 1 week ago

And unpopular for a reason. At that age most people don't really know what they want in a life partner. Sure there are cases where this scenario works. But the majority of people are nowhere near emotionally developed. They still haven't found out who they really are. Almost everyone I know is quite different from the 18 year old version of themselves. Personally, if I'd have married my high-school sweetheart ( which at the time I was sure I would), I'd surely been divorced in my mid to late 20s. She's really nice as a person. But she's been divorced and remarried more than once.

by rmiller 1 week ago

See what I'm saying

by Accurate_Leg_8319 1 week ago

No, but I respect it

by Unable-Race-9158 1 week ago

And one I actually agree with

by Anonymous 1 week ago

I'm 18 so yes I'm young but obviously you wouldn't stick to them any longer if they've turned into a different person. In the rare chance that your highschool sweetheart ends up being the person you actually get along with on an intimate level, then I think it can turn into a beautiful marriage.

by Anonymous 1 week ago

I get that this is your opinion, but most statistics for high school sweetheart marriages do not agree.

by AdLast 1 week ago

Most unpopular opinions don't agree with stats either. They're just stupid opinions not based in fact.

by Anonymous 1 week ago

Exactly…wait

by Accurate_Leg_8319 1 week ago

It depends on the circumstances I imagine, though rare, there should be examples of them working wonderfully.

by adrien75 1 week ago

Is remaining young and naive necessarily a bad thing? The typical traits that makes a person mature… are often boring

by adrien75 1 week ago

Sure, but there are probably also examples of abusive relationships turning healthy. That doesn't mean you shouldn't still avoid abusive relationships.

by Anonymous 1 week ago

Was gonna say, everyone has room to emotionally mature down the line. Maybe if you and your sweetheart are already emotionally mature adults (rare) then yeah. Otherwise, playing the field and seeing what's on the otherside is essential to the growth process.

by Anonymous 1 week ago

I completely agree. I have no idea why I dated pretty much all my exes really. Especially my high school ex. I remember a family friend offered me a bet that we would not be together once we hit 25. I was so young and dumb so I took it and told him get ready to pay. I was so absolutely sure for no reason at all! We broke up when I was 20 lol.

by Anonymous 1 week ago

Yes, because the decisions we make as teenagers generally turn out to be great....

by Forsaken-Care 1 week ago

I did. It wasn't just unpopular but interesting (for once).

by Forsaken-Care 1 week ago

True, but college-age people don't make much better life decisions either.

by Anonymous 1 week ago

College educated couples have a lower divorce rate than non college educated people.

by Benjaminmclaugh 1 week ago

Not that I disagree, but what does college education have to do with the high school sweethearts thing...? I know a few amazing couples who first got together in high school, all went to college and have good jobs now, and are still together now (my group being older millenials) Are you saying that people who stay with their high school partners are generally not college educated? (not disputing that, just never heard this before)

by Anonymous 1 week ago

IIRC they're also less likely get married in the first place and stay together longer before doing so.

by Anonymous 1 week ago

Yet you're expected to know what career path you want to do for the rest of you life and get into lifelong debt to pursue that path all as a teenager.

by Jabshire 1 week ago

These days? I'd say you aren't anymore because everyone knows you will not be staying at any company or job too long.

by Forsaken-Care 1 week ago

I'm talking about the social pressure of going to university/collage straight out of high school.

by Jabshire 1 week ago

Yes, because the decisions we make as teenagers generally turn out to be great.... It's not necessarily advocating teenagers marry, but that people try longer term relationships rather than "play the field". Or are you suggesting teenagers don't date at all? That would be a really unpopular idea. That would make more sense than playing the field under your premise. If teens generally make bad decisions(as you imply with the sarcasm), best if they not serially make bad decisions over and over. Also, read the whole text OP wrote, not just the title. It ends with: If you're in a relationship that is working don't break up just to see what's on the other side of the fence.

by Ok_Illustrator_2108 1 week ago

Teenagers should definitely date, because its a great way to learn how to have intimate relationships and work out how to do it maturely.

by Forsaken-Care 1 week ago

Statistically, the less sexual partners a woman has the better chance she has for a happy marriage and less chance of divorce

by Anonymous 1 week ago

Got a source on that one?

by Forsaken-Care 1 week ago

Also worth nothing that it was generally the same for men and women.

by Forsaken-Care 1 week ago

I'm afraid you did not understand the assignment

by Ordinary-Travel-9223 1 week ago

Can you share the links of those statistics?

by Dazzling_Cat 1 week ago

Did you even read this study? Dude, this study has nothing to do with what you said 😂

by Dazzling_Cat 1 week ago

Those other studies are not conclusive either. They say there's a link but they can't explain why. Also, in this types of studies you don't even know if people are telling the truth. Maybe the studies were made just to push traditional family propaganda and shame on freedom of sex ideas. I don't understand how they could arrive to a specific conclusion, but having no idea how they got that conclusion. That doesn't seem right.

by Dazzling_Cat 1 week ago

Maybe read the research methodology before making such baseless claims.

by Forsaken-Care 1 week ago

That doesn't seem right. Well, shoot. It must've slipped past peer review while the publisher was distracted. Time to pull the article.

by Stephon90 1 week ago

How is that related to the conversation

by OptimalWeb 1 week ago

ok incel

by Allenwilderman 1 week ago

You can call names all you want if you think I'm an incel that's fine . It's kind of funny. I can't help that is what the social sciences say. It's a well-known fact for a long time.

by Anonymous 1 week ago

Obviously, you are triggered by something that leads you to name-calling. I hope you're doing OK.

by Anonymous 1 week ago

💀

by arnaldo60 1 week ago

They are most definitely not ok

by Stephon90 1 week ago

I know several couples that are high school sweethearts. The ones that I know that have stayed together, have cheated, at least one of the people in the marriage has cheated. They are still together but the cheating factor is between them for sure. No thank you, for me personally.

by Benjaminmclaugh 1 week ago

Yeah this is common because the curiosity of not dating anyone else their whole lives becomes too much

by Anonymous 1 week ago

At some point they find someone else attractive/intriguing and they don't know how to handle it.

by Benjaminmclaugh 1 week ago

Yup…exactly why I think people shouldn't take those marriage vows until they're 10000% sure

by Anonymous 1 week ago

Well, this is something that makes me beyond grateful that I didn't have a high school sweetheart because I am not the same guy I was in high school, and what I'd look for in a partner is so different now. Heck, I barely even relate to friends I used to have back then and we were thick as family. Definitely an unpopular opinion.

by Anonymous 1 week ago

This may work for SOME people but generally wont work for most.

by Anonymous 1 week ago

How can someone check most of your boxes if you don't know what your boxes are? Being with different partners when you're younger helps you identify which boxes you want ticked.

by Anonymous 1 week ago

I'm not letting the rest of my life be based on whoever was in close proximity to me as a 14-16 year old while my hormones were insane and I was incredibly stupid

by Anonymous 1 week ago

There it is, the dumbest thing I am going to see today.

by Anonymous 1 week ago

Why

by First-Preparation540 1 week ago

It's not dumb so much as it is an uninformed opinion. They probably don't have experience in what they're talking about about.

by Anonymous 1 week ago

I think the way the title is worded makes it a dumb opinion. But the description is basically saying it's dumb to break up solely for the purpose of experimentation if you're already in a good relationship. And that's reasonable.

by First-Preparation540 1 week ago

The issue is that kids are stupid and don't know what's good in the long term. I was incredibly stupid at that age. I confused lust with love. The other issue is that high school "you" isn't the "you" you'll be in a few years. Hell, I was a completely different person just 2 years after leaving high school. And as a guy, Marrying someone early is probably the worst thing you can do. You're completely risking you financial future on something that's statistically is going to fail. By all means, date your high-school sweet heart after high-school. But, I'd tell my daughter to not marry her's until she was at least mid-20s and until they've lived together and maintained a household for a few years.

by Anonymous 1 week ago

Exactly. I'm 24 and I just went to my friends wedding to her highschool sweetheart with nothing but excitement and joy in my heart for them, because I've seen them grow as people individually and together. Went to different colleges, then moved in together after graduation and have built an amazing life for themselves. They're just as in love as they were when they started dating at 16, but you can see how much that love has matured and been reignited several times. They are a RARE exception. I look at other people getting married at my age and younger I'm like 😬😬😬 "good luck with that I guess".

by Anonymous 1 week ago

God no

by Embarrassed_Oven 1 week ago

This is very much a case by case basis

by Hendersonkirlin 1 week ago

My sister married her high school sweetheart. They've almost been together 25 years. They seem happy but I bailed on marrying my high school sweetheart.

by No-Lettuce 1 week ago

I loved my high school boyfriend at the time (together almost 5 years) and his family was so dear to me. They really accepted me as part of their own family and I needed that in my life. They would be the only thing good about staying with him. Marrying him would have been one of the worst decisions I could have ever made in life.

by Anonymous 1 week ago

yes, and no. The problem is humans have a fear of missing out which can and will drive apart these relationships, and often causes regret later when they realize they had what they wanted all along, but it will never be the same

by Anonymous 1 week ago

I feel like if someone leaves their high school sweetheart they probably aren't having all their boxes checked

by Anonymous 1 week ago

Funny how that works out, I'm glad you recognize your worth!

by Anonymous 1 week ago

I'm with my high school sweetheart 17 years later. When ya know ya know

by Anonymous 1 week ago

Just celebrated 15 years and going stronger than ever. It's true that you just sort of know.

by Hettingersasha 1 week ago

That proves they didn't know

by Hettingersasha 1 week ago

The girl I liked in HS turned out to be a scammer, has plenty of debt, and likes to ask the unpopular but rich guys for money and expensive stuff. So yeah I dodged a missile.

by Anonymous 1 week ago

Well for me it did work. I am with my high school sweetheart since 15 years ago… But I'd be a fool to say I shouldn't have checked the field a little. Really know what I want. Plus it will not help you be more mature later. You stand in place with just one person and will be unable to handle certain people especially the ones that try to meddle in your relationship. Especially boundaries And like someone else said, it's very important to be from loving families that stayed together.

by Anonymous 1 week ago

This is a bad idea and unlikely to work out.

by Anonymous 1 week ago

Everyone I know that did this was divorced by 35

by schroederdoming 1 week ago

I mean some people don't have high school sweethearts so they have no choice but to date as adults

by Weekly-Emu-6119 1 week ago

Very unpopular. There are also countless examples proving how bad it can be.

by Disastrous-Seat 1 week ago

I would probably be dead if I had done that lol. But two of my cousins and one friend did this and they all went through/are going through nasty divorces

by Anonymous 1 week ago

Great truly unpopular opinion. Honestly the probability of finding your soulmate in high school is so low. I also think getting with someone so young will forever impact your relationship style - for example, when I was 15/16 I used to care about not being left on read or silly things that would start silly arguments. My past relationships were built upon some silly rules that used to be important to me but even when you grow up it's so hard to break away from this. I also think staying with someone from such a young age slows you down in your emotional growth. I know so many friends that are with their high school sweethearts and they could genuinely find someone who would make them much happier but they are too co-dependent at this point. I used to date this guy from high school till year after university and honestly it was such an unfulfilling relationship. Now I met my current partner as an adult and the experience is so much better.

by SnowOk 1 week ago

People usually change a lot from their high school self. Also, you say love is wonderful hard work that pays back, but that sounds more like sunk cost fallacy.

by Anonymous 1 week ago

What if your highschool sweetheart was a terrible and abusive partner?

by Dazzling_Cat 1 week ago

The op says "if the relationship is working"; clearly if one of them is terrible and abusive they should break up

by Impossible-Focus-221 1 week ago

I agree. But this is not an unpopular opinion at all, is it?

by Dazzling_Cat 1 week ago

Why did you fell for a terrible and abusive person anyways? Skill issue

by adrien75 1 week ago

The issue is that a 18 year old isn't going to know what a "good partner" is in the long term. You have to date a few people to really get a feel for what fits you. A 18 year old also don't know how they'll change as a person over the next couple years.

by Anonymous 1 week ago

Kids are stupid. They make bad decisions. Let's not encourage them to trap themselves in a relationship that requires legal fees to get out of.

by Anonymous 1 week ago

I stayed with my high school sweetheart for 21 years. We never married or had kids. Anyways, she cheated on me with multiple men for around 6 years or so. Don't marry your high school sweetheart. People change. You're not the same person you were at 17. People grow apart..

by Smart_Run8085 1 week ago

I saw some mathematical breakdown that you should see 35% if what's out there, then pick the next best one.

by Anonymous 1 week ago

35% of 3.5bn?

by Anonymous 1 week ago

Ew no, If I would have done that I would be a fake Morman right now. Im a goth metalhead... that would have been BAD.

by Anonymous 1 week ago

I share your unpopular opinion

by Anonymous 1 week ago

I don't see the difference between marrying your partner in high school or in your 40's. If you guys aren't compatible anymore, that's that.

by Plastic_Belt_3509 1 week ago

I married mine and after 18 years it ended. I'm not sure it made financial sense because unlike most people in my city we had kids in our mid 20s before I had a stable job (I was in grad school). And emotionally I know it wasn't better because I was very immature and I was clueless. That being said it was easier. I didn't have to navigate almost any of the dating nightmares that my still single in there late 30s - early 40s have to deal with. Heck I don't know how some of my friends in their 20s do it. It just seems impossible out there. Luckily since I have kids I don't really have to venture back out there and I can be very picky when I do because another day or night alone just doesn't scare me. There's no pressure. I would be fine by myself from here on out. Plus I'm mature enough now that I can be an actual partner.

by Jadepurdy 1 week ago

I think bro was the 1 in a million where his high school romance worked out and ended up married and thinks what happened for him can happen for others. The truth is teens are stupid and make stupid decisions, sure it seems okay by then but when we grow up we look at things differently. Statistically these high school romances don't work out. But for those who it did, then you're lucky!

by emitchell 1 week ago

Nice try, Utah.

by andersonleon 1 week ago

I sometimes do think about how different my life would have been. I certainly would not be in the country I live in now, probably less successful financially and maybe mentally unsound. The same would have been true I think for my ex

by Medium-Victory8082 1 week ago

Truth is there is no real rule, but it can definitely work out for some people/personalities. Seen it around me. Quite rare though.

by Jaden42 1 week ago

I mean, given the stats that just factually wrong. Not to mention financially you'll be able to move out earlier, buy nicer things This is a wild assumption that isn't supported by reality, just like the core premise.

by Sea-Judgment-1815 1 week ago

Finally! This an unpopular opinion.

by Top-Analysis8447 1 week ago

This isn't necessarily just unpopular.. it's kind of stupid.

by Kemmerroma 1 week ago

I'm glad I didn't make that bet, my "highschool sweetheart" was incredibly emotionally abusive and I didn't know any better so I just put up with it. The whole relationship went up in flames towards the end of college and was easily the worst relationship I've ever been in.

by Anonymous 1 week ago

I would almost say yes. I was with my highschool sweetheart for 12 years, and we would probably still be together if he hadn't developed a severe mental illness (schizophrenia). My current relationship is with someone I was close to dating around that time, but didn't. So this resonates with me. And back in the early days, people did get married relatively young, and most of them did stay together. Though, you could argue that the women had no rights, so divorce wasn't possible. But by the time the 70s rolled around, some people were getting divorced. It just wasn't as common with older couples who had got married fresh out of highschool. It kind of relates to how teens make connections better than adults, and the friends you make when your younger end up becoming lifelong friends.

by Successful_Throat571 1 week ago

Amazing unpopular opinion. Lots of wisdom here. Very anti-Disney. Mature take on love as a verb. People are missing the growing together part. Beautifully said.

by Anonymous 1 week ago

A teacher of mine did this and he was proud of it too. Nice guy.

by Anonymous 1 week ago

You're assuming the best case scenario. It's like saying "winning the lottery is the easiest way to get out of debt". That's not really a strategy. Playing the lottery is a strategy, and it won't work out for the majority per definition. Most high school relationships are NOT meant to last.

by Anonymous 1 week ago

I think it used to be this way when men had a more domineering role in a relationship.

by Anonymous 1 week ago

The most unpopular opinion of unpopular opinions.

by Anonymous 1 week ago

Two of my best friends did this and they have wonderful relationships. Albeit, we're only 8 years out of school so there's still plenty time for things to go wrong. I find that they're much better at moving on from arguments than other couples.

by Anonymous 1 week ago

You think that if you get married nearly a decade before your brain is finished developing... I'm assuming your brain hasn't finished developing. How old are you OP?

by No_Effective 1 week ago

Did everyone have a high school sweetheart?

by Anonymous 1 week ago

Nah

by kaley02 1 week ago

The best financial 'decision' you can make, is meeting your life partner young. More because then you are each other's cheerleaders, because you are naturally invested in the success of the other half.

by Anonymous 1 week ago

I don't agree. People change a lot after high school, college, working, life experiences shape them.

by Anonymous 1 week ago

OP has to be a teenager

by Anonymous 1 week ago

Old Xer here, never married. Cannot tell you how much I wish I had met my wife in kindergarten and gotten married after college.

by Sandraratke 1 week ago

Unpopular because of how sad and wrong it is.

by Anonymous 1 week ago

My best friend in middle school started dating her bf back in 7th grade, 2006.. they're still together today. My other best friend in middle school started dating her bf back in 8th grade, 2007… they're still together today. My ex boyfriend from middle school started dating his high school sweetheart in like 11th grade I think? So around 2009-2010? They're still together today. And I started dating my husband 2010, just before senior year. Still together today! But hey it's different for everyone!

by Sad_Investigator_713 1 week ago

Those sound like high school partners, not high school sweethearts. High school sweethearts are a couple that are together from high school, past college and into adulthood.

by Hettingersasha 1 week ago