+2,586 500 years ago when men went to war it was common for them to force their wives to wear chastity belts while they were away. Therefore, in the meantime, only a locksmith could remove these belts. This probably explains why 'Smith' is the most common name in the phonebook. amirite?

by Anonymous 14 years ago

Girls love to sleep around.

by Anonymous 14 years ago

I'm sure that notion goes well in tandem with your username.

by Anonymous 13 years ago

Theres a locksmith in my family lineage (: haha

by Anonymous 14 years ago

+ and an adulteress hoe.

by Anonymous 14 years ago

+ and?

by Anonymous 13 years ago

:O woah. this actually makes a lot of sense.

by Anonymous 14 years ago

That is the basis of my theory. Things that make a lot of sense will be homepaged and later at some point become POTD.

by Anonymous 13 years ago

So why would a locksmith have the key or whatever to open the chastity belt? You'd think the husbands would make sure only they could open it.

by Anonymous 14 years ago

Well...I'm not real sure of the workings of a chastity belt but I imagine going to the bathroom with one on would be kind of difficult. That has to be the reason why it needs to be unlocked.

by Anonymous 14 years ago

Actually, they did have holes in the business areas. It's just....the holes had spikes. http://pixdaus.com/pics/1248978513ymSKC5A.jpg

by Anonymous 13 years ago

That's terrifying

by Anonymous 13 years ago

Finally dudes with small dicks now have the upperhand!

by Anonymous 13 years ago

That looks REALLY uncomfortable...

by Anonymous 13 years ago

Ouch.

by Anonymous 13 years ago

Fuck her anyway. The pleasure will drown out the pain.

by Anonymous 13 years ago

I'd become an old spinster if that were the alternative.

by Anonymous 13 years ago

Probably in case the original is lost. They'll have a copy key pattern in case of that situation as well as to make their rape plan work.

by Anonymous 13 years ago

Locksmiths MAKE keys, dunkass.

by Anonymous 13 years ago

She said COPY KEY PATTERN, meaning they would have quicker access to make a copy of the key instead of making another from scratch, dunkass. :D

by Anonymous 13 years ago

Uh, I was replying to Stepharoo, not ThisIsWhyImRite...

by Anonymous 13 years ago

Woah. I'm just like-- wait-- woah.

by Anonymous 14 years ago

?

by Anonymous 14 years ago

¿

by Anonymous 13 years ago

¶ amidoinitrite?

by Anonymous 13 years ago

Ah HELL nah! -Trya

by Anonymous 13 years ago

I'm sorry you only have one eye and no mouth.

by Anonymous 13 years ago

you need to unlock a chasity belt before you pee. How's that supposed to work? I'm pretty sure it was mostly dads.

by Anonymous 14 years ago

Not necessarily. Pee can fit through. A penis cannot.

by Anonymous 14 years ago

That explains why my last name is Strongmetalcrushingrapist

by Anonymous 13 years ago

Or it could just be a coincidence.

by Anonymous 13 years ago

You must've had a tough childhood with a name like that

by Anonymous 13 years ago

Oh yes, the other little boys and girls would point and laugh at me every time the teacher took roll. I walk down the street and everyone looks at me as if i myself am a strong metal crushing rapist, but Im not! Im really not! Years of therapy have taught me to embrace my name for it holds much heritage, from colonel Strongmetalcrushingrapist who won the Great War for our country to the late Israeli King Strongmetalcrushingrapist that brought freedom to his people. So while kids may be cruel, one day I'll teach them not to mess with a Strongmetalcrushingrapst, or they'll be sorry!

by Anonymous 13 years ago

You know, with so many famous ancestors, you'd think I'd have heard of your surname before.

by Anonymous 13 years ago

Brush up on your history, bro

by Anonymous 13 years ago

Freedom for his people, but what aboot freedom for my Palestinean ancestors, the Weakmetalphobicvictims?!

by Anonymous 13 years ago

I hope you don't play any sports or else the jersey makers will have a tough time getting that name on the back.

by Anonymous 13 years ago

The word "chastity" has the words "ass" and "titty" in it. Coincidence?hmm

by Anonymous 13 years ago

Except that that would be chasstitty, not chastity.

by Anonymous 13 years ago

As always, God just HAS to be the one with the amazingly profound statement.

by Anonymous 13 years ago

Oh please you're just still mad that I banished you from heaven.

by Anonymous 13 years ago

Joke's on you! Everyone on Earth knows you should have just killed me! You made the wrong choice, man. And now I am corrupting every human's mind with my horrible deeds, so that they will all burn in Hell! Well, everyone except homosexual couples. They are clearly too sweet and caring to be sent to Hell. But of course, everyone already knows that...right?

by Anonymous 13 years ago

No, if i had killed you, it would have been too quick. Now you are stuck living a lonely life in Hell. Most humans fear you, they love me.

by Anonymous 13 years ago

You still gave me the ability to screw with humans' minds, when you clearly could have just banished me to Hell forever and gave me no way to ever make contact with humans again!

by Anonymous 13 years ago

I gave humans the choice. If they choose you over me, they deserve to endure your punishments.

by Anonymous 13 years ago

You're God. Change the spelling.

by Anonymous 13 years ago

I'm god, I wrote bibles, nor dictionaries.

by Anonymous 13 years ago

God* Not**

by Anonymous 13 years ago

*I **Don't ***Give ****A *****Shit Also, yes, you are going to Hell for that.

by Anonymous 13 years ago

I think not.

by Anonymous 13 years ago

I thought "nink"!

by Anonymous 13 years ago

My Grandma's surname is Dickie. I wonder what her ancestors did...

by Anonymous 13 years ago

Probably wear pants composed of thick, durable fabric.

by Anonymous 13 years ago

Is that why my chastity belt is barbed and lacks any means of removal?

by Anonymous 13 years ago

No, you added those effects yourself.

by Anonymous 13 years ago

[Citation Needed]

by Anonymous 13 years ago

One of my favorite posts became the potd...I'm a hipster. (:

by Anonymous 13 years ago

Like @Sandrine said, even if having an affair was common, I don't think they would get married, so how could they take the last name Smith? I don't think divorce was even allowed then..

by Anonymous 13 years ago

The kid could take on the locksmith's last name, although that would cause the husband to be pretty pissed.

by Anonymous 13 years ago

But that would make no sense because then the husband would know and the whole thing would be a waste. Although, since they didn't have contraceptives they probably got pregnant really easily so the husband would probably figure it out.. unless she pulled some Mary shit and claimed God. Idk man. I'm just gonna stop.

by Anonymous 13 years ago

I AM POSTING BECAUSE PEOPLE WHO POST ON THE POST OF THE DAYS ARE COOL.

by Anonymous 13 years ago

I'm pretty sure you just ruined that generalization, dude.

by Anonymous 13 years ago