+1,864

We really need a nicer way to tell people their breath stinks without hurting their feelings. Its like 'Hey im bored! Lets go brush our teeth!" Or, "I have to make a phone call, hold this gum in your mouth.", amirite?

99%Yeah You Are1%No Way
Eesas avatar
Share
175 105
The voters have decided that Eesa is right! Vote on the post to say if you agree or disagree.

"You're not my friend, you never were, I fucking hate you, and your breath stinks."

This comment was deleted by its author.
@1296664

inb4 Nonsense_Narwhal makes another television reference

Anonymous +8Reply
@1296664

Hey y didnt u reply to urself. thas wut u do!!!1!!1!

Anonymous +6Reply
Anonymous +2Reply
This comment was deleted by its author.
@1296831

I'm sorry... I'm an imposter...

Anonymous +1Reply
This comment was deleted by its author.
@1296835

I like it when you talk to yourself... It makes me and myself happy...

Anonymous 0Reply
This comment was deleted by its author.
@1296841

Nom nom nom... Nononsense_Narwhal is pleased.

Anonymous 0Reply

I bet you can't fit 20 mentos in your mouth!

TheStooges avatar TheStooge Yeah You Are +89Reply
@TheStooge I bet you can't fit 20 mentos in your mouth!

So you can do that, but I bet you can't drink this can of Diet Coke!

Shadis avatar Shadi Yeah You Are +22Reply
@TheStooge I bet you can't fit 20 mentos in your mouth!

Except then you're down twenty mentos lol

Anonymous +6Reply

"Hey, who wants to play eat the mint?"
"Right here" Eats mint
"You win!"
"Alright, what do I win?"
"Another mint!"
"Oh, I'm going for the high score!"

Fitzkriegs avatar Fitzkrieg Yeah You Are +61Reply

OHMIGOD 5 gum came out with a new flavor! Wanna try?!

Ellens avatar Ellen Yeah You Are +55Reply
@Ellen OHMIGOD 5 gum came out with a new flavor! Wanna try?!

Side note: for a gum vendor, 5 gum's commercials look really elaborate and expensive.

WryVendors avatar WryVendor Yeah You Are +48Reply

"Let's play a game! Whoever rinses their mouth with two fluid ounces of Listerine first wins!"

"You haven't picked your cup up yet."

"That's because I'm... trying to give you a head start! Because your... birthday is today!"

"My birthday was last week. And you didn't remember."

"..."

Shadis avatar Shadi Yeah You Are +50Reply

I usually just pull out some really good gum and pretend like I'm trying to eat it without them noticing. Reverse psychology kicks in and then they ask for a piece.

Shugahs avatar Shugah Yeah You Are +39Reply

Oh no, I dropped all my floss! I guess we have to use it now.

Anonymous +38Reply

"My dream is to become a dentist, may I practice my teeth cleaning skills on you??"

Juless avatar Jules Yeah You Are +35Reply
@Jules "My dream is to become a dentist, may I practice my teeth cleaning skills on you??"

"Umm... no it's not, you just told me last week that you'd never be a dentist, because you hate touching other people's teeth so much.... You said it was gross and that you'd rather tear out your own intestines and hang yourself from it"

Hey i just bought some girl scout cookies, how about a thin mint?

Anonymous +33Reply
This user has deactivated their account.
@1296623

Yes. Seeing as gum is currency at my school.

Rass avatar Ras Yeah You Are +33Reply
@Ras It's that way at EVERYONE'S school.

At my school, hand jobs are currency.

Anonymous +17Reply
@At my school, hand jobs are currency.

(Hoe Alert): That must be pretty tricky during class, you can pass gum inconspicuously, but it doesn't seem you could pass cum as easily.

Rass avatar Ras Yeah You Are +10Reply

"Hey buuuudddy, wanna play a game?
'Sure, what's it called?'
"It's the 'see how long it takes you to finish 23 packets of mints' game. You go first!"

@Sinner "Hey buuuudddy, wanna play a game? 'Sure, what's it called?' "It's the 'see how long it takes you to finish 23...

Hey sinner, take this pill, it will get you high for the whole night! (it's actually an altoid, or as I call them, altitoids)

I KNOW WHY YOU'RE NOT GETTING GIRLS!

"Hey bro! I invented a new flavor of gum! I call it 'Brush Your Fucking Teeth'! Have a chew!"

Chapsticks avatar Chapstick Yeah You Are +21Reply

here's a tic tac is one way

@stepdom here's a tic tac is one way

Whoever can swig the mouthwash in their mouth the longest wins!

Anonymous +105Reply
@Whoever can swig the mouthwash in their mouth the longest wins!

(Your+name+(optional)): Whoever can keep the toothbrush againt the inside of their mouth the longest wins round 2.

@ROUND 2.... START! (in street fighter announcer voice)

(Your+name+(optional)): Let's close our mouth and run really far away from each-other!

Here you want this, its a tooth brush, tooth paste, mouth wash, floss, and an instructional video on how to use them all. I had extra in my house that we need to get rid off, and you would really be doing me a favor...

"Let's see who can finish this mint first without biting it!"

God_the_Almightys avatar God_the_Almighty Yeah You Are +17Reply
@No

Gasp! You dare argue with God? Oh, the shame!

Writingislife16s avatar Writingislife16 Yeah You Are +2Reply

"Brush your teeth! ...for charity x]"

CBbasketballs avatar CBbasketball Yeah You Are +14Reply

we pow'ful need a nicer way t'tell varmints their breath stinks wifout hurtin' their feelin's. Its like 'Hey im bo'ed! Fry mah hide! Lets hoof it brush our teeth! Fry mah hide!" Or, "ah have t'make a phone call, hold this hyar gum in yer mouth.", amirite?

Anonymous +14Reply

Haha I like the first option in the post! :)

Anonymous +10Reply

"Your breath smells like shit."
Probably not the best thing to say.

First POTD I've laughed at. Great post

afternooners avatar afternooner Yeah You Are +8Reply
@afternooner First POTD I've laughed at. Great post

You know who ELSE's first POTD I've laughed at?

My MOM's.

Anonymous +7Reply
Anonymous +5Reply
@Rebecca?

(Not Chauncy Pickles): No, just a random stalker.

Anonymous +1Reply
@Shadi I don't believe you!

(Chauncy Pickles): YOU HAVE TO! I DON'T KNOW THIS REBECCA YOU SPEAK OF!

Anonymous +3Reply
@(Chauncy Pickles): YOU HAVE TO! I DON'T KNOW THIS REBECCA YOU SPEAK OF!

Another interesting conversion brought to you by the slightly senile Chauncy Pickles

@_____________ Another interesting conversion brought to you by the slightly senile Chauncy Pickles

This really isn't Chauncy. or at least this half isn't. He isn't THAT crazy.

Anonymous +1Reply
@This really isn't Chauncy. or at least this half isn't. He isn't THAT crazy.

@1297315 (Thisreallyisnt): HOW DARE YOU BRING DISHONOR (pronounced dish on err) TO MY NAME!!!

white glove slap I demand satisfaction! WE will have a battle of whites! We whip eggs at dawn! Be there, or be a poseur!

Shadis avatar Shadi Yeah You Are +2Reply
@_____________ Which half o.O?

The Rebecca Half. Reply to the other half. And voila! Chauncy!

Anonymous 0Reply

Ooh ooh! How about you unwrap a piece of gum, pretend you trip and shove it so far up their mouth, they won't even be able to thank you.

EpicBoys avatar EpicBoy Yeah You Are +6Reply

"Bubble-blowing contest! You first."

On a side note, I keep reading this as "hold this gun in your mouth".

Anonymous +6Reply

lol I remember nigahiga did a video on people with bad breaths
(when he was funny)

here have a piece of gum!, ooh I also happen to have some mouth wash, here you can take it I have extra at home. oh what's this some shampoo? here....(something like that)

TalkingRices avatar TalkingRice Yeah You Are +5Reply

HEY GUYS let's get so drunk that we dont even notice!

Pretty sure some comedian said this. I'm not calling you out or anything, but finding out who said this is going to drive me crazy all day.

ctiscoolers avatar ctiscooler Yeah You Are 0Reply

I might be bateing a dead horse, but thank you for posting this!

Anonymous 0Reply

Thanks for sharing. Always good to find a real epexrt.

Anonymous 0Reply

God help me, I put aside a whole afternoon to fgirue this out.

Anonymous 0Reply

Yo, that's what's up trtuhlfluy.

Anonymous 0Reply

aNnhJ5 <a href=

Anonymous 0Reply

It's spkooy how clever some ppl are. Thanks!

Anonymous 0Reply

Was toatlly stuck until I read this, now back up and running.

Anonymous 0Reply

Your article perfectly shows what I nedeed to know, thanks!

Anonymous 0Reply

Thanks for wrtinig such an easy-to-understand article on this topic.

Anonymous 0Reply

HAHAHAHAHAHA!!!

NARNIAs avatar NARNIA Yeah You Are -2Reply

lOL

@Mister_Jim_Halpert lOL

I'm not sure how League of Legends has anything to do with this

Anonymous +45Reply
@I'm not sure how League of Legends has anything to do with this

(Your+name+(optional)): Clearly he meant something like "Lemon or Lime," as in the flavor of the gum. Or maybe he was referring to "little old ladies," since they take their teeth out at night and thus briefly eliminate bad breath. He might even have meant "Listerine or loser," since anyone who has poor dental hygiene is most definitely not someone I want to be seen with.

FlyingGuineaPigs avatar FlyingGuineaPig Yeah You Are +52Reply

Sixty-ninth comment wins a freebie! Tell your friend their breath stinks, then show them the freebie and they won't be mad at you! YAY FREEBIES.

Shadis avatar Shadi Yeah You Are -6Reply

Stole this from Owen Benjamins stand up on Comedy Central Presents...

@Jules No one cares.

See thats the problem with this website. Nobody gives a fuck if something isnt original

Anonymous +1Reply
Please   login   or signup   to leave a comment.