That would probably cause TSS
You're a douchebaguette so it probably doesn't matter
Do you mean a baguette made of douche, or the female douchebag? Because the term douchebag doesn't imply a dude. It implies someone like you.
Sorry, I regret to inform you that you were adopted... :(
1) Being adopted is a good thing. That's like saying, "Your parents chose you specifically because they already believed you're special."
2) I wouldn't mind being adopted, my family is crazy. It would be weird though because I look just like my dad.
They did. Well, it's not real, I think, but they had something about it when Vince did an Eminem commercial for the Recovery CD.