+1,741 It would be awkward if fmylife.com had user profiles like amirite does. "Timothy has complained about his life in 64 posts. 74,022 people have told him his life is fucked and 55,637 people have told him he deserves his sucky life." amirite?

by Anonymous 13 years ago

"Timothy is fucked 58% of the time."

by Anonymous 13 years ago

The other 42% is by his hand.

by Anonymous 13 years ago

0% by other people

by Anonymous 13 years ago

foreveralone.jpg

by Anonymous 13 years ago

"345 people favourited his made up stories"

by Anonymous 13 years ago

Timothy has been locked out of his car 12 times, 5 of his dogs have died. 130 people have reported his comments

by Anonymous 13 years ago

6 different people favourited the time when you locked your baby in your car and then left him to die of starvation.

by Anonymous 13 years ago

Timothy has complained about life in 64 posts; 58 of these posts have been about his pathetic love life, 6 of them have been about how some people mistake him as a girl.

by Anonymous 13 years ago

Poor Timothy...

by Anonymous 13 years ago

Yeah, sounds like his life sucks.

by Anonymous 13 years ago

Timothy has lost his life savings one time, but that was the only time he really needed them.

by Anonymous 13 years ago

well like half of those stories are fake anyways . . .

by Anonymous 13 years ago

14 different people favourited the time when you were robbed and killed by four angry people dressed as teenage mutant ninja turtles.... Yeah I'm sure that happened. Your life really sucks because you sit at home with your mac computer making up random stories on FML to fill in the lonely Saturday nights you spend at home with your grandmother.

by Anonymous 13 years ago

Please, that's so average it should be on mlia.

by Anonymous 13 years ago

That right there is an FML in itself.

by Anonymous 13 years ago

http://www.fmylife.com/money/17044811 It was only one guy.

by Anonymous 13 years ago

How exactly would this be awkward?

by Anonymous 13 years ago

I always found having the name Timothy to be awkward. Why Timothy, why not Timmy or Tim.

by Anonymous 13 years ago

or Thames.

by Anonymous 13 years ago

Or MLIA Sally has made 4867363 posts 0 have been featured on the homepage.

by Anonymous 13 years ago

And 0% of them were true.

by Anonymous 13 years ago

Jimmy has mentioned ninjas in his posts 147 times. All have made it onto the homepage.

by Anonymous 13 years ago

Jimmy only passes his classes because he is good at drawing dinosaurs and ninjas. But the ninjas are "invisible." (Plus he has dumbass teachers)

by Anonymous 13 years ago

Now how would a website know THAT?

by Anonymous 13 years ago

Never underestimate the power of the internet. NEVER.

by Anonymous 13 years ago

Jimmy has built 87 pillow forts, 19 with his fiancee that proposed with a Green Lantern ring, and 15 with employees of Wal-mart.

by Anonymous 13 years ago

...Who are the other 53 with?!

by Anonymous 13 years ago

Probably with his friends who look exactly like Harry and Ron.

by Anonymous 13 years ago

With a random girl wearing a dinosaur similar to his, resulting in a high-five and a light-saber battle. After several Nerf gun wars, he and the teacher who gave him credit for drawing a wizard on his test went making pillow forts at Walmart with the help of the employees. Then Jimmy watched several Disney movies while drawing in a coloring book, at the same time making hilarious jokes about how Miley Cyrus, Twilight, and Justin Beiber all suck and Harry Potter is the best book of all time. Oh, and his aunt's cousin's mailman's sister's dying wish was to have a post on MLIA. All just a typical day for an average person.

by Anonymous 13 years ago

(Your+name+(optional)): Wow. For me a typical day consists of eating some vegetables and flying around a bit. I had no idea humans had so much fun...

by Anonymous 13 years ago

I can see the MLIA'ers moderating posts, and thinking, "Wow this post is boring, definatley not voting this one for the homepage......Wait, did he just say NINJA? Totally going to vote yes for this one.

by Anonymous 13 years ago

I wonder what goes through their minds. Do they think, "Hm, I want to have a post on the homepage of My Life is AVERAGE. I got it, I'll post a totally fake an unaverage post about ninjas and Harry Potter! Perfect!

by Anonymous 13 years ago

Best comment ever? I think so. Needless to say, I voted it up. The look on God_the_Almighty's face when he saw it? Priceless.

by Anonymous 13 years ago

Best. Comment. Ever!

by Anonymous 13 years ago

Or MLIA: TwilightGirl17 has posted 46 times. 36,928 people thought her posts were average. 39,374 people realised her posts were bullshit she conjured up to get more "average" votes.

by Anonymous 13 years ago

TwilightGirl17 would be the WORST possible user name for that site!

by Anonymous 13 years ago

Timothy deserves his misfortune 87% of the time.

by Anonymous 13 years ago

What aboot mylifeisbro? Brandon has made 69 posts, the last intentionally to create a 69th post.

by Anonymous 13 years ago

Brandon did 0 push ups today, but lied and said he did 200.

by Anonymous 13 years ago

Or sixbillionsecrets? XxmandyxX has made 48 posts. She really needs to get her act together.

by Anonymous 13 years ago

she has cut herself 37 times, threw up 5 times this week, and attempted suicide twice.

by Anonymous 13 years ago

But she still wants all of you to know that you are beautiful, and there is someone out there in the world for you.

by Anonymous 13 years ago

Youtube? 10 people like Jessica's videos. 8,000,000 don't know about her channel.

by Anonymous 13 years ago

Jim has made 1,659 comments regarding the size of the dislike bar.

by Anonymous 13 years ago

2691738 People have missed half of Ted's comments and only thumbed them up because he told them to.

by Anonymous 13 years ago

Except YouTube does have user profiles.

by Anonymous 13 years ago

George Has commented On 24 popular videos referring to the small dislike bar and how it resembles the size of Justin Beiber's penis.

by Anonymous 13 years ago

*waits for comment about facebook*

by Anonymous 13 years ago

Timothy stays on facebook all day. He has spent a total of 2345135 hours claiming to be unavailable to chat.

by Anonymous 13 years ago

Timothy likes 58 of Garrett's pictures, 48 of which are of Garrett flexing without a shirt on.

by Anonymous 13 years ago

All of Timothy's friends have stopped poking him just because they found out he was gay.

by Anonymous 13 years ago

Feeling neglected, Timothy deactivated his facebook account and came to amirite with a name that would only be known from amirite and a profile picture that would embody his yearning for attention.

by Anonymous 13 years ago

(Chauncy Pickles): Timothy is now known as the user below this comment.

by Anonymous 13 years ago

Wait, what!?

by Anonymous 13 years ago

(Chauncy Pickles): hello

by Anonymous 13 years ago

All of Timothy's profile pictures consist of his favorite pokemon for the day.

by Anonymous 13 years ago

weights* Build up that muscle!

by Anonymous 13 years ago

Timothy has viewed your profile 6,372 times in confidence that facebook doesn't count the amount of times you view a profile. Timothy underestimated the power of facebook.

by Anonymous 13 years ago

I'd hate to be named Timothy.

by Anonymous 13 years ago

What is your name, God?

by Anonymous 13 years ago

(Your+name+(optional)): What is your name, Your+name+(optional)

by Anonymous 13 years ago

I've read the name Timothy so many times through the comments it doesn't even sound like a name anymore. Timothy Timothy Timothy.

by Anonymous 13 years ago

"Vanity has 224 Myspace friends. She loves most of them, but hates some of them, especially bf-stealing skankss :("

by Anonymous 13 years ago

psh there aren't that many ppl on myspace

by Anonymous 13 years ago

Finn has made 574 posts, 500 of them are about adventures, 44 of them are about Jake, and the other 30 are a compilation of Princess Jokes.

by Anonymous 13 years ago

Finn has made 37 catch phrases, 11 of which are used regularly.

by Anonymous 13 years ago

whitepeopleproblems.com Timothy had posted 55 problems, 66% of the readers had experienced these problems, 34% believe that he is not white

by Anonymous 13 years ago

Timothy has been robbed 47 times, dumped 12 times, cheated on 76 times and told to fuck off by a 6 year old 8 times. FHisLife.

by Anonymous 13 years ago

Well, this is awkward. STOP GETTING INTO MY PERSONAL LIFE.

by Anonymous 13 years ago

+1111 make a wish! lol jk I'm not a teenage girl. wait

by Anonymous 13 years ago

Or Redtube yum

by Anonymous 13 years ago

Timothy has watched 627 porn videos. He disliked 194 of them but came to 100% of watched videos. He has had to clean jizz off his carpet 275 times.

by Anonymous 13 years ago

Timothy's mother walked in on Timothy 8 times. After each instance, Timothy would wait two minutes after she left, then resume watching the videos.

by Anonymous 13 years ago