+1,499

Here's a fun game for moms to play: when your kid gets home from school, be lying on the floor screaming in pain, "YOU STEPPED ON A CRACK!" amirite?

97%Yeah You Are3%No Way
scloud22s avatar
Share
237 81
The voters have decided that scloud22 is right! Vote on the post to say if you agree or disagree.

I've always heard "Tread on fractured pavement to ensure your mom's enslavement."

...When I'd come home from school, she'd always be preparing dinner with some unassuringly wide grin on her face, as if someone was watching...

I never knew there were so many moms on amirite.

AllyKats avatar AllyKat Yeah You Are +41Reply
@AllyKat I never knew there were so many moms on amirite.

its not like you have to be a mom to YA....

Favvkess avatar Favvkes Yeah You Are +12Reply
@Favvkes its not like you have to be a mom to YA....

This post originally started with "Moms:"

Fitzkriegs avatar Fitzkrieg Yeah You Are +4Reply
@Shadi Why did it change?

Probably just to make sense as a post that anyone can vote on. The joke hasn't really changed at all.

Fitzkriegs avatar Fitzkrieg Yeah You Are +2Reply
This comment was deleted by its author.
@1466858

Just to make things clear: are you saying that the joke basically hasn't changed, or are you saying that the wording of this post has remained exactly the same?

Fitzkriegs avatar Fitzkrieg Yeah You Are 0Reply
@AllyKat I never knew there were so many moms on amirite.

I know who I'm hooking up with tonight hello smilie

Roys avatar Roy Yeah You Are +11Reply
@AllyKat I never knew there were so many moms on amirite.

I honestly don't remember posting this.

AllyKats avatar AllyKat Yeah You Are -2Reply

Poor kids would probably feel overwhelming guilt & panic. :<

Vitaes avatar Vitae No Way +30Reply
@Vitae Poor kids would probably feel overwhelming guilt & panic. :<

Whereas privelaged rich kids could just buy new moms.

Was that your point? un smilie

@Shadi Whereas privelaged rich kids could just buy new moms. Was that your point?

what sucks about this comment is that it's really clever but the two assholes above took up so much room for their little debate that I very nearly forgot what the comment said that you are replying to

Favvkess avatar Favvkes Yeah You Are +38Reply
@Vitae Poor kids would probably feel overwhelming guilt & panic. :<

When I was little, my brother and sister and mom would have me chase them around the house into a room and hide behind the door and when I ran in they would fall out from behind it with their tongue sticking out, pretending to be dead. Fell for it every time. I would cry, but I got over it in about two seconds when they "woke up".

@Vitae Poor kids would probably feel overwhelming guilt & panic. :<

Maybe only do it when they're a teenager, so they're old enough to understand(if not after a moment of confusion/panic)that you're just joking around?

FlooPowderPowers avatar FlooPowderPower Yeah You Are +6Reply
This user has deactivated their account.
@1451456

it wouldn't really be funny because the kid wouldnt get the joke. it'd be like telling a joke to yourself.

Favvkess avatar Favvkes Yeah You Are +1Reply
@Favvkes it wouldn't really be funny because the kid wouldnt get the joke. it'd be like telling a joke to yourself.

The kid doesn't need to get the joke. That's what makes it funny. Fuck the kid and his/her underdeveloped sense of humor.

Cuban_Bs avatar Cuban_B Yeah You Are +11Reply
This user has deactivated their account.
@1451561

Which is why I like the website.

Astronaut_Wills avatar Astronaut_Will Yeah You Are +1Reply
This user has deactivated their account.
@1451577

Amirite! #NotAFag. #DoneToPissYouOff

Astronaut_Wills avatar Astronaut_Will Yeah You Are +4Reply
This user has deactivated their account.
@1451604

Are you from America?

Astronaut_Wills avatar Astronaut_Will Yeah You Are 0Reply
This user has deactivated their account.
@1451619

No no. I am also American. But you should no that almost nothing in America is from america. Yet you still use it. Why? Because you like it. Can the same not apply to the internet?

Astronaut_Wills avatar Astronaut_Will Yeah You Are -18Reply
This user has deactivated their account.
@1451650

I get it. But those things are annoying. I do what I enjoy doing. If people dislike that they can vote down. They have that option. That's one of the great parts about this site. You seem to have such a big problem with it than vote down.

Astronaut_Wills avatar Astronaut_Will Yeah You Are +1Reply
@Astronaut_Will uDumb. #TakingStuffToSeriously

Inb4 massive argument comparing Twitter and Amirite.

Wait... hmm smilie

Dwights avatar Dwight Yeah You Are +17Reply

Parenting: you're doing it right.

ItsBrooklynFools avatar ItsBrooklynFool Yeah You Are +27Reply
@ItsBrooklynFool Parenting: you're doing it right.

Thanks, I really needed this. My neighbors have been telling me that beating and raping my children is not ok, and they even got child services involved. But, thanks to you I know that I am a good parent, and my children.. I mean my neighbors should go suck it.

Anonymous +34Reply
@Deal... I'll suck it. When and Where? LETS GET IT ON!!!

Yeah I moved to North Korea though. If you remember my name is Kim Jong II. Just go to my palace, just walk right in (no need to knock, but make sure you take off your shoes), and say "Hello, remember me, I'm here to suck your dick"..

Anonymous +8Reply
@Thanks, I really needed this. My neighbors have been telling me that beating and raping my children is not ok, and...

What's with all the ruckus over there? Don't make me call social services on you!!

Anonymous +6Reply
@That ruckus, that's me fucking your wife.

Dials number
"Hello, officer? My neighbors have kidnapped my wife, and now one of them is raping her!"
"Sir, this is Domino's. Would you like to order two medium two-topping pizzas for just $5.99 each?"
"Well, I suppose the police will be hungry when they get here..."

Anonymous +5Reply

When I read "moms" I immediately assumed this post would be offensive to people with more than one female parent. I was wrong though...

Dwights avatar Dwight Yeah You Are +15Reply

Do kids these days even know what that would mean?

This comment was deleted by its author.
@1465806

The relevancy of your comment is stunning.

My mom threw herself on the ground in the mall randomly one day and yelled "YOU STEPPED ON A CRACK!!!" and staying really still. Mall security asked us not to come back. I was 8 and it was hilarious.

CarolineGustins avatar CarolineGustin Yeah You Are +1Reply

I laughed so hard... I am so doing this.

fuustoleits avatar fuustoleit Yeah You Are 0Reply

broken mirror = 7 years of bad luck.
broken condom = 18 years of bad luck.

@Sean broken mirror = 7 years of bad luck. broken condom = 18 years of bad luck.

Making a bad, semi-irrelevant comment that is also an overused joke = hated by all.

DandyLions avatar DandyLion Yeah You Are +58Reply
@Shadi How is semi-irrelevant any different from semi-relevant?

Well, would you rather eat semi-sweet chocolate or semi-bitter chocolate?

One sounds like something you would use to trick your friends into eating, like wasabi.

God I hate wasabi.

@lonely_jew Well, would you rather eat semi-sweet chocolate or semi-bitter chocolate? One sounds like something you would use...

What are you doing?
Eating chocolate.
Where'd you get it?
Doggy dropped it.
Where'd he drop it?
In the sewer.
What's it taste like?
Cow manure.

Does that answer your question?

@Shadi What are you doing? Eating chocolate. Where'd you get it? Doggy dropped it. Where'd he drop it? In the...

No, unless my question was "What's a clever rhyme that doesn't answer my question?".

@lonely_jew No, unless my question was "What's a clever rhyme that doesn't answer my question?".

To answer THAT question, I would eat the semi-bitter chocolate. The bitterness is the only thing that reminds me that I still live and breathe...

@DandyLion Making a bad, semi-irrelevant comment that is also an overused joke = hated by all.

I don't really see how it's irrelevant. The post talks about a superstition, and I talked about one in my comment. It's just the first thing that popped into my head when I read the post.

@DandyLion Semi-irrelevent.... better

But still not good. Dang, there goes my short streak of good comments on the POTD.

@Sean But still not good. Dang, there goes my short streak of good comments on the POTD.

you could delete your comment. All these people would hate you though.... hmmm. This is more complicated than I thought.

Favvkess avatar Favvkes Yeah You Are +2Reply
@Favvkes you could delete your comment. All these people would hate you though.... hmmm. This is more complicated than I thought.

Nahh, doesn't everybody have a bad day? I'll just be better next time. Watch me get most loved or something like that on tomorrow's POTD.

i don't get it

Anonymous -21Reply
@i don't get it

"Step on a crack, break your mothers back"?

You've had no childhood.

Shugahs avatar Shugah Yeah You Are +45Reply
@i don't get it

If only all amiriters had immune systems as great as yours.

@i don't get it

Please tell me that posting "I don't get I on the POTD isn't becoming a thing. It seems like people have been saying it much more recently.

This comment was deleted by its author.
@1465642

i dont think you get the post....

Favvkess avatar Favvkes Yeah You Are 0Reply
Please   login   or signup   to leave a comment.