Our whole universe was in a hot, dense state and nearly 14 billion years ago erections started, wait
Well, first Eve lost her cool, then Adam just started to drool...
Adams really cool, except when he's a tool.
Eve can't swim in a pool, because she's just a fool.
But there is one rule, that is so cruel.
Do not eat the apple or you'll
be treated worse then stool.
But, Eve's a fool,
who broke the rule.
So they rode their mule,
right out of the school.
The funny thing is the apple wasn't even special, I just told them that because I was bored and I can.
This reminds me of a joke that I stumbled across in my voyage across the internet:
"First god created earth, then he rested...
Then he created man, then he rested...
Then he created women, and no one has rested since."
I rest. You guys don't.
God, you can't mess with people that way! Just think "What would Jesus do?"
I don't think you should be telling me what to do.
I hope you don't talk to your mother that way
Last I checked I was the all-creating one. I have no mother. I made yours. Now I'm done having petty arguments with you humans.
I'll do whatever I want.
what kind of Messiah are you?!?
That was awful. Don't quit your day job.
Well at least we all know that Adam wore the plants in the family.
And the only reason he said that was because god created Man first, since he didn't want any advice on how to do it.
1. Nice name
2. That is funny.
1. Seven people disagree with you.
2. Someone probably pissed in your cereal this morning, cause you have no sense of fucking humor.
3.We have to stop doing this.
1. Wouldn't she notice if her cereal was slightly tinted yellow from pee?
2. C-C-C-OMBO B-B-BREAKER
1. She was probably eating a cereal that turns the milk yellow.
2. I got nothin' else to say.
THE COMBO HAS BEEN BROKEN. no0b
1. First emoticon fail.
i don't think stepdom was trying to be funny....
And a lot of incest.
Well God coul've made more people so they don't have to have incest to populate.
No, I thought it was funny to watch them have sex with their brothers and sisters.
now we know
Because when man was first created, his semen shot out in pellets, not streams.
Technically wouldn't Noah and his wife have populated the world as we know it today?
What are they all looking at?
....you mean they've got x-ray vision?
No. They're hiding in your pants.
In my skinnyjeans? How big are these guys?
I love how they're all raisin their eyebrows simultaneously.
let's have babies baby
If you're having sex and you hear a big BANG, you're doing it wrong.
I say either party could be doing this wrong, but I just want to be impartial.
Everything started with a big bang regardless.
I always imagined Adam and Eve as small people.... Maybe Skinny Bang?
omg its at +666
Omg its at +818.
Adam and Eve weren't the only two people created.
What Bible have you been reading?
The Holy Bible.
I recall only 2 people being created.
Genesis 4:14 onwards a little talks of other people and societies.
By then they had populated..
No, that's wrong.
No, it's right.
unless you you include lilith!
I thought I was the only one who had heard of Lilith!
dont. just dont
Wild animals don't count.
Why is everybody downvoting this guy? Hes right. There are two different creation stories in the Bible from two different sources. In one story they talk about making a man and tearing out a rib, but in the other one, it just says God made humans, not how many. People always group these two stories together.
Spencer can you please stop posing this on facebook? noone cares you got post of the day or whatever. like, really. :) thanks.