I remember the first time I looked up porn... I did it on my moms computer. Then immediately after I felt insanely bad so I made up an incredible lie saying how I actually wanted to search the word "corn" on google because our fifth grade teacher celebrates national corn day. I think she believed me. Long story short, I watch porn at least 3 times a week now.
The only thing my sex ed class could stop giggling long enough to agree on was that the female reproductive system totally looks like a cow's head.
I rest my case.
My 9th grade health teacher compared to it as a reindeer head...with the antlers and all. He brought in antlers and wore them the whole class
P-p-peni ... No no you say it
There was always that one kid with no boundaries that yelled it when no one else wanted to.
"Oh, god. WHAT HELL HAVE YOU UNLEASHED!"
AH, and everytime there was a diagram of a penis or vagina in a science book, all hell broke loose.
I remember we were in the sex education section of life science in seventh grade, and we used to have these fill-in the blank style workbooks. And one day we were going over the answers in class, and on the last question's answer was "vagina." So, my teacher called on some random kid who repeatedly claimed that he "didn't get that one" as his face grew redder. So my science teacher (bless you Mr. Keanan) proclaimed "Bullshit. It's a vagina guys, let's all say it together. Va-gi-na."
Yeah, in grade 4, during sex ed, the teacher asked us if anybody knew what the female sex organ was called, and this poor girl raised her hand and proclaimed with such a sense of knowing - "Ba-gina!"
Close, but no cigar.
That sounds like something off of MLIA
My science class is guilty for still doing this.
"Hey, turn to page 394!"
Everyone in hearing distance does it.
My 6th grade english teacher had a book called "Why do men Have Nipples?",hidden at the very end of a bookcase. It dealt with important topics, like "Why is poop green?" and "Does semen have nutritional values?". Mind you, we are all middle-schoolers. So when this book was discovered, it quickly spread around the class like wildfire. All hopes the teacher had of keeping her class under control dissolved in front of her eyes as the book was passed around and everybody in the class was screaming with annoying raucous laughter that can only come from 6th graders. The teacher got up, snatched it from whichever kid was reading it, and put it through a paper shredder.
So wait... does semen have nutritional value?
I'm personnaly more curious about the green poop.
I heard that is can be beneficial in reducing plaque. Alternatively that was just made up by guys.
Then after school, she went and bought another copy.
After I watched Hocus Pocus, I looked up "virgin" in the dictionary and din't get it
If there's anybody that knows what a virgin is, it's the girl that constantly posts pictures of cats in comment sections.
I'd hardly call a girl who posts pictures of her pussy on the Internet a virgin.
It's not her pussy, it's ones she finds off Google. And Bing, when she's feeling naughty.
This is my pussy http://ctrlv.in/56996 it wants to eat your dick
i prefer the term "au natural"
If there was a comment of the day I'd pick yours.
Says the C-C-COMBO B-B-BREAKER?
ZOMG i thought her username was "i hear ando music" O.O Where ando is some kind of gangster....
That's about all the porn I can take right now! I get a boner just thinking about those sleek letters on that bright page. OH GOD I CAN'T HANDLE IT!
I was extremely close to asking my dad what a prostitute was.
In like 7th grade I was in the car with my best friend, her sister, and her dad. We passed some inmates working on the side of the road and, I'm assimg she didn't know what it meant, she yelled, "Hey look, prostitutes!"
I did that in the fourth grade...
he described it as a woman who sells her sex... which I took to mean that she sold various liquids in bottles.
I asked me dad was testicles were in like, 3rd grade.
Also he had a lengthy conversation with me about hookers in the car on the way home from the bowling alley once... eh.
In 4th, 5th and 6th grade, my school would come in and give our class a talk about sex and puberty once a year.
So in 4th grade she starts talking about testicles dropping and I had no clue what she was asking, so me being the loud mouth that I am, ask what testicles were out loud to my entire class. Also I live in a small school so everyone in my grade knew of this in an hour.
Next in 5th grade she starts talking about pubic hair and all of the cons from it. She really scared me, and I really didn't like the sound of it, so I ask her if I could shave my pubic hair when I grow up. Everyone laughed at me again and the whole grade knew in an hour. And the worst part was that she said no, when you can. She gave me false information, and that can not be tolerated.
In 6th grade my friends (yes, unfortunately I have friends in real life) held down my arms so I could not raise my hand, therefore saving me from more embarrassment.
Good friend you have there.
Tl;dr. I upvoted though
I remember playing the "Penis game" was the most bad ass thing you could do, yell penis as loud as possible. I always ended up laughing and losing.
"penis... heheheh your turn"
"Penis!... Your turn hehhehheheh"
And then there's the one kid that simply doesn't give a fuck.
We played that once while on a run for cross country. It was 6:30 in the morning, we were running through a neighborhood where people were most likely still asleep, and there's that one guy who screams "PENIS!" at the top of his lungs. We had to turn a nice easy recovery run into a speed workout. Not fun.
Oh yeah man, it got really intense. There would always be that kid that tells "VAGINA" to try and be funny.
That kid who didn't care was me. We played it last year in health and we got multiple complaints. It was one of those "had to be there" moments.
I play the "Fire game", it can only be played in crowded places like airports and movie theaters though...
Or if you're really a thrill seaker, there's the spin off "Bomb! There's a motherfuckin bomb in the building" version.
I didn't know what sex was until middle school.
I still don't know what it is.
For not know what it is you sure are good at it.
Being raped by you doesn't really count.
But then I couldn't report you to the cops.
In the state of Kansas, it is only rape if you were physically unable to say no.
Look out Kansas...
I had Sex Ed in 4th grade
Yeah, me too. Except "with" was somewhere in my sentence.
I had sex with Ed in grade four?
me neither, man. Losers unite!
That horrible moment in your life when you realize your parents had sex
All of these comments are hilarious.
Puberty class was almost just as bad too. At my school at least.
"Puberty.. Heheheheh. Pube."
When my class was taking it a girl didn't know that there were two holes, she was so shocked when she found out. She probably went exploring after school...
You mean three?
I have five.
One for each victim, amirite?
I'm pretty sure she knew about the anus, I just didn't count it. Or were you talking about the cervix?
No, I counted the anus.
She was a girl and she didn't know?
Except the part where we had to learn what the fallopian tubes and stuff were.
People who fucking have sex for money don't fucking need to know that.
In middle school, watching porn was like smoking crack.
We would get extra credit if we could recite the Spermy's Journey song my teacher made up in front of the whole class.
No one got extra credit.
Or like a Christian reading the Song of Solomon in the Bible.
When the teacher was out of the classroom, I and the other talented artists of the class would draw our interpretations of sex on the board. It looked basically like a stack of two people on a bed. It make all hell break loose with giggles. We were badasses.
Here's a diagram:
Not to mention that they still have their clothes on.
I think my exact rendering of "sex" (in my little child mind) was dry humping of two 30-year-olds.
"I'll show you mine if you show me yours."
Best deal ever.
My mom teaches 3rd grade and she makes each student stand up in front of the class and say "Penis and Vagina!" A teacher's aid heard her students screaming it in the schoolyard and almost faint.... I'm sure these kids won't have trouble with sexual education class.
Why does she do that.
They always giggle, and are too scared to say it. So she tries to get them used to them to saying it.
me and my friend morgan were in the history section of the book store looking for books on our favorite historical figures. all of the sudden this section on sex comes up. right next to ceasar and cleopatra was the book "different sex positions in bed" and in the subtitle: Special addition for virgins. and next to that book was: How to have sex for dummies. only "Dummies" was crossed out and had "virgins" on it.
-true story i swear on my virginity.
Umm I didn't do that kind of stuff in elementary Puberty hadn't hit yet.
You weren't pubescent at 10-11-12? Rough.
Thats like 5th or 6th grade, so its not really elementary.
Fifth grade is still elementary school where I live.
Oh. Well in my district we had sex ed in fourth grade as well as having the entire fifth grade curriculum be focused around preparing for middle school.
I've had sex ed since third grade. Obviously in elementary school, it was learning about YOUR parts, and then in middle school it was a combination of both sexes'.
By sex ed i mean learning about both sexes as well as sexual intercourse.
Depending on where you live..
My elementary school was JK-8.
Did you go to a religious elementary school? The private and Catholic schools go up to 8th grade around here.
It was a public school.
Many around where I live are like that.
Also, I live in a town, not the city.. so there's not as many kids. There was only about 750 in the school. My high school only has about 1500 - 2000 people.
I wasnt in elementary those ages. I guess thats the mixup
we were playing a game of Guess 5. it's a game where you get a catagory name and have to name 5 of something in that catagory. My mother, left brained (logica) is so witty at stuff like this. I thought it was funny. so did everyone else. I'm reading off that catagory list and she goes: name 5 different sex postitions in bed. an even harder catagory topic is when it says "current" so my sister goes: name 5 CURRENT sex positions in bed. all hell broke loose after that of inappropriate jokes.
Fuck that. We'd actually watch porn. ;D