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It's kind of weird that someone becoming best friends with a person who isn't their partner, spending all their time with them, telling them everything and connecting with them really well in general, isn't considered cheating when having a random, drunk, sexual encounter is, amirite?

74%Yeah You Are26%No Way
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It all depends on the person. I think people associate sex with cheating because sex is supposed to be a very intimate act of affection. It's supposed to be something that brings you closer to your partner. Sex isn't something that you just throw around like a handshake. That's my opinion on it anyway.

@StickCaveman It all depends on the person. I think people associate sex with cheating because sex is supposed to be a very...

Its okay to have a great friendship with someone of the opposite sex, unless its Justin Bieber or Kim Kardashian

Gerard_Ways avatar Gerard_Way Yeah You Are +1Reply

In all fairness every girl gets a little jealous (some more than others) when their guy gets close to another girl; even if it isn't considered cheating and you shouldn't really be annoyed it's can still cause arguments in some relationships.

@Liloquand In all fairness every girl gets a little jealous (some more than others) when their guy gets close to another girl;...

Typical high school relationship:
"HOW COULD YOU?? AFTER ALL THESE DAYS???"
"What??"
"YOU ACKNOWLEDGED MY FRIEND?? HOW DARE YOU, YOU HAVE SOME NERVE.."
"I'm sorry.."
"NO YOU'RE NOT. WE. ARE. OVER."

@amiritesucksnow Typical high school relationship: "HOW COULD YOU?? AFTER ALL THESE DAYS???" "What??" "YOU ACKNOWLEDGED MY FRIEND??...

Typicl middle school relationship
"You smiled at our female teacher! Pedophile!"
"but I love you"
"I can't believe I let you kiss me! Eww"
whines about what fing douches boys are on FB

KirstenAnns avatar KirstenAnn Yeah You Are +9Reply

So if you're in a relationship with someone, you aren't aloud to have any deep relations with a member of the opposite sex? I'm not sure but I'm sure that considered controlling. If you're have sex with that person then yeah, its cheating but if not, its fine.

I'm pretty sure that's called emotional cheating.

Cuban_Bs avatar Cuban_B No Way +39Reply
@Cuban_B I'm pretty sure that's called emotional cheating.

I'm pretty sure I never heard of that before.

Anonymous -1Reply
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@1615257

Lol yeah I've read people commenting about that. It works fine on my mobile though, so I had no idea prior.

I don't think that people are getting the point of the post. OP isn't saying you// can't // have an emotional connection outside of your relationship. Instead, she's saying that it's odd that casual sex is considered cheating while an emotional relationship is not.

Axolotls avatar Axolotl Yeah You Are +27Reply

You just gave me a whole new perspective on relationships

HerpADerps avatar HerpADerp Yeah You Are +15Reply

Having close friendships with people you're not in a relationship with is healthy. If your significant other is the only person you can confide intimate knowledge in, you have no outlet to discuss your relationship when you need an outside perspective and being around only your partner would become mundane.

I would be more hurt if my partner fell in love with someone else than if they had a random hookup, but I don't think having best friends outside of your partner is something negative nor should it be considered "emotional cheating."

@DanielJames Having close friendships with people you're not in a relationship with is healthy. If your significant other is the...

That's not what's considered emotional cheating. It goes beyond just friendship. If you were to develop a relationship with someone other than your partner that had as much, or more, intimacy than with them then it's usually considered a problem. Like the older you get you hear about people having "work husbands" or "work wives" that they have a deep emotional connection/relationship with that is inappropriate. You can be intimate with a person without sex being involved, just like you can have sex with a person with no intimacy. But again, that goes way beyond just being good or best friends with someone.

@Cuban_B That's not what's considered emotional cheating. It goes beyond just friendship. If you were to develop a...

We are both in agreement that having a close friend isn't emotional cheating. Unfortunately, other people are much more jealous and territorial individuals.

For example, my best friend's girlfriend of 7 years doesn't even like him speaking with other girls because she thinks it's considering cheating. (Even though she's hooked up with another guy a few times behind his back and doesn't think anything of it.)

She's quite lovely...

I feel lucky that my girlfriend is also my best friend.

@pikabeau I feel lucky that my girlfriend is also my best friend.

You're also unlucky in that if you guys breakup you might not be either to her. I said MIGHT, maybe you guys will have a Ted and Robin relationship. Not saying you'll breakup either.

@CatMan You're also unlucky in that if you guys breakup you might not be either to her. I said MIGHT, maybe you guys will...

On a side note, I can't believe How I Met Your Mother is so popular that topics from the show can now be thrown around in regular conversation.
Kudos to the directors.

(Or maybe half the people who read that comment won't get it)

@MartellusBoss On a side note, I can't believe How I Met Your Mother is so popular that topics from the show can now be thrown...

Well I think the majority of the people who watch the show are between 13-30 and that's also the majority of the people on this site so I'm pretty a larger population of the website watches the show. I would think more than half but I'm not positive.

@I would almost be positive it's less than half.

Oh maybe I'm just shitting myself here.

@CatMan Oh maybe I'm just shitting myself here.

Maybe, maybe not. I just don't know of that many people that watch it.

Anonymous +1Reply
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@1614450

So it all just depends, apparently.

Anonymous 0Reply
@CatMan You're also unlucky in that if you guys breakup you might not be either to her. I said MIGHT, maybe you guys will...

What's the point in a relationship if there's no risk involved? We were best friends before we started dating, so at least we knew what we were getting ourselves into.

And we've had this discussion. We think we would end up like the lesbian Ted and Robin.

@pikabeau What's the point in a relationship if there's no risk involved? We were best friends before we started dating, so...

Sweet....you got my reference. Well I hope you two stay together for a very long time.

If you guys ever get married...can I be flower girl?

@CatMan Sweet....you got my reference. Well I hope you two stay together for a very long time. If you guys ever get...

Sure you can. I have no clue when we'll be allowed to marry since we live in Alabama, but we'll be having a commitment ceremony that should be lovely.

It's not cheating if they don't find out... ;D

@Joker That's nonsense, narwhal.

I'm just joke...er..ing around? :D

:(

@Nonsense_Narwhal I'm just joke...er..ing around? :D :(

Maybe if I reply to myself, people will love me again

Haha! That's a good one, Narwhal!

I was talking about this with a good friend that is a female the other day. It seems to me that dating and a friendship are very similar things. The only difference is that society puts sex into something secret and naughty. I don't know if I agree that sex is something casual because when we do have sex we feel a sort of extreme closeness and attachment to our partner. Also, when we are in a dating sort of relationship, we feel a sort of possessiveness and think that the person should only belong to us. It does make sense, though, because if they felt that way with everyone, there wouldn't be the same special feeling that two people in love get and life would be much more boring.

@Brettward95 I was talking about this with a good friend that is a female the other day. It seems to me that dating and a...

Except that dating stands for having feelings for your partner that is beyond just friendship.

@Boufaka Except that dating stands for having feelings for your partner that is beyond just friendship.

I was trying to say something like that, but my thoughts were a little jumbled up. It's kind of at the end, but yeah.

Having sex is something you're supposed to do with only your significant other (if you're in a relationship), friendship is something that should be able to be shared with a number of people at the same time, no matter how strong it is. As long as there's no attraction, I don't see why it should be considered cheating.
If you do have feelings for someone whilst dating someone else, I still don't think it's as bad as physically cheating because at least you care about your significant other enough not to act on your desires.

Anonymous +8Reply

So then people in monogamous relationships can't have good friends?

Vitaes avatar Vitae No Way +7Reply
@Vitae So then people in monogamous relationships can't have good friends?

they can have good friends. i just think any relationship where the couple isn't best friends isn't a real relationship

rosi3s avatar rosi3 Yeah You Are -13Reply
@rosi3 they can have good friends. i just think any relationship where the couple isn't best friends isn't a real relationship

But that's not what the post says. It says nothing about the relationship between the couple, so it sounded like you were saying that having a really close friend should be considered cheating more than getting drunk and having sex. So now I'm a bit confused on what you were trying to say. Can you elaborate?

@Clementines But that's not what the post says. It says nothing about the relationship between the couple, so it sounded like...

i just think its strange that in general relationships are based on who you are having sex with more than who you are emotionally close to.

rosi3s avatar rosi3 Yeah You Are +1Reply
@rosi3 i just think its strange that in general relationships are based on who you are having sex with more than who you...

The thing about sex is that it often is a deeply emotional experience. Cheating is about breaking the trust of your significant other (it could be sleeping with someone you're not monogamous with, or even in a poly relationship to go beyond the boundaries you set). It's trust that's the issue, not sex.

@rosi3 i just think its strange that in general relationships are based on who you are having sex with more than who you...

Sex is an experience that bonds two people emotionally, something you do out of passion. That should be saved for your partner. But, when you're friends with someone, the relationship is different kind of bond that doesn't involve passion, just pure friendship. It's nothing close to cheating on someone.

Relationship doesn't mean you only get one friend. That would suck.

This comment was deleted by its author.
@1614579

he's probably on vacation

@ravensrule he's probably on vacation

I checked and he commented yesterday.

Yes but sex is usually something reserved for only your romantic relationship. You are still going to have relationships with other people (family, friends, children, etc.), which means you are going to invest in emotional attachments to them. Your partner isn't the only person in the world you're allowed to love and connect with (non romantically).

"How could you sleep with her?!"
"Calm down, it's not like we were totally platonic friends. I didn't even know her!"
Do you see how ridiculous that sounds?

HDYKMDs avatar HDYKMD No Way +2Reply

I don't think you should be better friends with someone else than you are with your S.O, regardless of whether you're having sex or not.
Your S.O should be the person you're closest to not only emotionally but physically as well

Anonymous +1Reply

Open relationships anyone?

A study found that men's brains had a stronger reaction when they were told their girlfriends had sex with another man, and women's brains had a stronger reaction when they were told that their boyfriends had developed a strong friendship with another woman.

I've never thought of sex as random.

That's because talking to your spouse is the hard part, so it's alright to talk as long as there's no sex. It's kind of like a dog letting another dog do his tricks for him, as long as the first dog still gets the treat.

KIM KARDASHIAN AND WHAT'S HIS FACE JONATHAN

Is it sad that that's what immediately come to mind

How the hell is this post of the day? I don't even...

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@1614798

I just find this crap hard to masturbate too.

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