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Fanfiction: because it would have been better if everyone had had sex, amirite?

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So shouldn't it be called fanfucktion?

Even in a fanfiction of my life there wouldn't be sex.

Brettward95s avatar Brettward95 Yeah You Are +49Reply
@Brettward95 Even in a fanfiction of my life there wouldn't be sex.

Try writing an autobiography and see how uninteresting your life is.

Then add interesting things in the middle of nowhere.

"I went into the line for lunch to get a burger, and then I eagerly stabbed the person next to me to death, as everyone around me screamed and ran away, as blood leaked all over the floor. Then, I headed over to a table and began to eat the burger, which was delicious."

@Ebony_Way sympathy hug it's okay

She hugged me! That means she wants the dick, right?

Brettward95s avatar Brettward95 Yeah You Are +40Reply
Ebony_Ways avatar Ebony_Way Yeah You Are +8Reply
@TheShamWowGuy clearly its "I ELDERLY I ELDERLY"

I meant the "She hugged me! That means she wants the dick, right?" one

Ebony_Ways avatar Ebony_Way Yeah You Are -1Reply

Most Fanfiction is so fucking weird...

Never again..

Shuns avatar Shun Yeah You Are +43Reply
@Shun Most Fanfiction is so fucking weird... Never again..

There are some really good fan fictions out there. It's not all shameless fifth grade quality fetishist shit. There are some truly fantastic pieces of work.

monstrositys avatar monstrosity Yeah You Are +77Reply
@Ebony_Way like My Immortal?

My Immortal is a classic. It goes without saying.

monstrositys avatar monstrosity Yeah You Are +34Reply
@monstrosity My Immortal is a classic. It goes without saying.

it was so deep, so goffik.... It made me crie sexily and want to run suicidally from the world

Ebony_Ways avatar Ebony_Way Yeah You Are +43Reply
@Ebony_Way it was so deep, so goffik.... It made me crie sexily and want to run suicidally from the world

Can you believe all the stupid prepz that flammed such a fantastic piece of literature?

monstrositys avatar monstrosity Yeah You Are +22Reply
@monstrosity Can you believe all the stupid prepz that flammed such a fantastic piece of literature?

omg dey r such posrs... espeshally Albert! he wor da arvil laveen cape 2 da conserrt renember?

Ebony_Ways avatar Ebony_Way Yeah You Are +13Reply
@Ebony_Way it was so deep, so goffik.... It made me crie sexily and want to run suicidally from the world

relly? it mad mii scard. It sayd viewer excretion is advised so i shit muhself all ova da place.

jraaeys avatar jraaey Yeah You Are +14Reply
@Ebony_Way like My Immortal?

I just read the entire fanfic wut

@monstrosity There are some really good fan fictions out there. It's not all shameless fifth grade quality fetishist shit. There...

YOU LUDACRIS FOOL. Y-Y-YOU HORNY SIMPLETON!

ENOBY IS GOING TO COME BACK AND TERRORIZE US ALL AGAIN.

jraaeys avatar jraaey Yeah You Are +4Reply
@jraaey YOU LUDACRIS FOOL. Y-Y-YOU HORNY SIMPLETON! ENOBY IS GOING TO COME BACK AND TERRORIZE US ALL AGAIN.

"And then... suddenly just as I Draco kissed me passionately. Draco climbed on top of me and we started to make out keenly against a tree. He took of my top and I took of his clothes. I even took of my bra. Then he put his thingie into my you-know-what and we did it for the first time.
"Oh! Oh! Oh! " I screamed. I was beginning to get an orgasm. We started to kiss everywhere and my pale body became all warm. And then...
"WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING YOU MOTHERFUKERS!"
It was...Dumbledore!"

Don't shit me- you liked it.

Jokers avatar Joker Yeah You Are +64Reply
@monstrosity My favorite line is "we started frenching passively."

My favorite line was "WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING MOTHERFUCKERS?"

Gerard_Ways avatar Gerard_Way Yeah You Are +21Reply
@monstrosity My favorite line is "we started frenching passively."

I liked "I ran back 2 da place in da forbiden forest were i lost my virility"

Ebony_Ways avatar Ebony_Way Yeah You Are +19Reply
@monstrosity My favorite line is "we started frenching passively."

I loved this exchange:
'"I MAY BE A HOGWARTS STUDENT..." Hargirid paused angrily. "BUT I AM ALSO A SATANIST!"

"This cannot be." Snap said in a crisp voice as blood dripped from his hand where Dumblydore's wand had shot him. "There must be other factors."

"YOU DON'T HAVE ANY!" I yelled in madly."

shelbyam118s avatar shelbyam118 Yeah You Are +14Reply
@Joker "And then... suddenly just as I Draco kissed me passionately. Draco climbed on top of me and we started to make out...

Nowhere in that passage does it say that her pants and underwear came off. So how could they have sex?

mchalla3s avatar mchalla3 Yeah You Are 0Reply

Its about time we had a POTD about fanfiction. Us weirdos need the spotlight too.

Ebony_Ways avatar Ebony_Way Yeah You Are +39Reply
jraaeys avatar jraaey Yeah You Are +14Reply
This comment was deleted by its author.
@1613405

HAPPY BIRTHDAY!

Simons avatar Simon Yeah You Are 0Reply

Especially if the two characters hate each other in canon. <___<

@TruttaceousTemulence Especially if the two characters hate each other in canon. <___<

oh yes, rival slash pairings are something that I will never understand.

happyyays avatar happyyay Yeah You Are +17Reply

Danny Fenton with Danny Phantom...I just...I don't...

And if they were both boys, apparently

Anonymous +32Reply

Fanfiction: Because some people are just horny simpletons.

jraaeys avatar jraaey Yeah You Are +32Reply

Imagine Harry Potter fanfiction where Voldemort finally finds someone he can love, they have hot steamy sex, and Voldemort no longer wants to take over the world...that's be an interesting ending.

Me and the girls down at the Harry Potter group wrote this monstrosity back in September. Beware, its a Voldemort/Crookshanks

http://www.fanfiction.net/s/737...urrs_of_Desire

Ebony_Ways avatar Ebony_Way Yeah You Are +29Reply
@Cgymnast7 what. the fuck.

We love you too <3

Ebony_Ways avatar Ebony_Way Yeah You Are +3Reply
Cgymnast7s avatar Cgymnast7 Yeah You Are +2Reply
@Cgymnast7 hahaha d'aww _^

Don't forget to leave a review telling us about how much bleach you added to your eyes after you read that :D

Ebony_Ways avatar Ebony_Way Yeah You Are +5Reply

Apparently, some fanfictions of LOTR had Gollum sex it up with someone random.

Creates a whole new meaning for, "My preciousss is very nice!"

Fanfiction about real people (like bands) is even worse.

Anonymous +18Reply

Hagrid... Dobby... The horror...

Clementiness avatar Clementines Yeah You Are +17Reply

Some FF writers have actual talent, but if they'd write something worthwhile and original, they might actually get somewhere.

KirstenAnns avatar KirstenAnn Yeah You Are +16Reply
@KirstenAnn Some FF writers have actual talent, but if they'd write something worthwhile and original, they might actually get...

But thats why they write FF, because no original ideas really coming to mind and because its fun :D

Gerard_Ways avatar Gerard_Way Yeah You Are +7Reply
@Gerard_Way But thats why they write FF, because no original ideas really coming to mind and because its fun :D

Do what I do- personal experience, mixed with current events, and a random controversial subject.

KirstenAnns avatar KirstenAnn Yeah You Are +1Reply
@KirstenAnn Some FF writers have actual talent, but if they'd write something worthwhile and original, they might actually get...

I write some fanfic (with OCs a lot too. Plus, a majority of my FF is /not/ romance based) though mostly original stuff. Not necessarily I have talent, but hey...

@Treeleaf I write some fanfic (with OCs a lot too. Plus, a majority of my FF is /not/ romance based) though mostly original...

I used to and it was all Twilight-related but there was never any sex. It's was like vampires living in New York City and trying to get around. Only semi-original, but hey. I never finished it.

KirstenAnns avatar KirstenAnn Yeah You Are 0Reply
Gerard_Ways avatar Gerard_Way Yeah You Are +16Reply
@Vitae http://ctrlv.in/46614

Oh my god, I love that blog.

monstrositys avatar monstrosity Yeah You Are +3Reply
This comment was deleted by its author.

Oh God...the Percy Jackson shippings are the WORST. Anyone feel like reading an implied threesome between Apollo, Artemis and Rachel? Actually, it was a lot more than just implied.
forever scarred

I actually love reading and writing fanfiction though, and some writers are seriously talented. I probably spend around fifteen hours a week on that damn site...

cherryblasters avatar cherryblaster Yeah You Are +12Reply
@cherryblaster Oh God...the Percy Jackson shippings are the WORST. Anyone feel like reading an implied threesome between Apollo...

It seems like they in particular always artfully describe the character in the middle of sentences.
"The son of Posiedon stared at the daughter of Hera's delicious breasts..."
WHAT THE FUCK I CAN'T FAP TO THIS!

Ram27s avatar Ram27 Yeah You Are +2Reply
@Ram27 It seems like they in particular always artfully describe the character in the middle of sentences. "The son of...

Artfully. More like someone's strange incest fetish coming to life through FF...those descriptions do get in the way though.
Plus, the boys always have huge dicks.

Annabeth stared at Percy's enormous 12 inch cock.
"Wow," she whispered. "They're not called the big three for nothing."

There will be a scene like this in every mature PJO fic.

cherryblasters avatar cherryblaster Yeah You Are +6Reply
@cherryblaster Oh God...the Percy Jackson shippings are the WORST. Anyone feel like reading an implied threesome between Apollo...

You think that's bad, you should try pretty much any fandom with comic book heroes. The shipping wars with the Young Justice cartoon are horrible and it's dangerous pretty much whoever you ship.

@fangirl12 You think that's bad, you should try pretty much any fandom with comic book heroes. The shipping wars with the...

Thanks for the warning, I'll stay away from those. Although I usually stick to books anyways, like Maximum Ride or the Hunger Games.

cherryblasters avatar cherryblaster Yeah You Are 0Reply

My friend made me listen to her read a fanfiction that was the Sorting hat/Hermione. It was like the freakiest thing I'd ever encountered

sansas avatar sansa Yeah You Are +12Reply

I've seen characters from "Penguins of Madagascar" in fanfics.
There's just some pairing you shouldn't ship...

REMUS/WHOMPING WILLOW

um... oh yeah, a while back my friend (kipkayify) and I wrote a Percy/Cauldron

Ebony_Ways avatar Ebony_Way Yeah You Are +10Reply
@Ebony_Way REMUS/WHOMPING WILLOW um... oh yeah, a while back my friend (kipkayify) and I wrote a Percy/Cauldron

The horrible part is that I can totally see that.

"And then Remus realized that the Willow was called whomping for a reason."

Axolotls avatar Axolotl Yeah You Are +23Reply

I might be biased because of my love of boylove, but there are some amazingly talented writers out there, if you can get past the crack and terrible stories there seems to be an abundance of.
I mean, being able to convincingly tell a love story, between two people, while keeping them in character is, in my opinion, a surprisingly difficult feat.
That being said, I don't ship pairings or anything; I just like reading stories where the characters are really, truly in love and fanfiction is a free, enjoyable supply of that.

Anonymous +8Reply
@I might be biased because of my love of boylove, but there are some amazingly talented writers out there, if you...

I agree but I do ship pairings. There are way too many stories that are PWPs, lemons, or just some stupid shit people throw together before acting like review whores. I cannot stand the grammatically incorrect stories.

Ebony_Ways avatar Ebony_Way Yeah You Are +10Reply
@I might be biased because of my love of boylove, but there are some amazingly talented writers out there, if you...

I ship the pairing of NearxOC. Mostly because death note does not have any realistic girls for Near, and any other guy would either be a hate pairing or just gross because Near is really young. For my purposes, MissehKeehl is the best.

mchalla3s avatar mchalla3 Yeah You Are 0Reply

Fanfiction /=/ all lemons. Just for the record.

@Treeleaf Fanfiction /=/ all lemons. Just for the record.

It's just terribly infamous for all the smut.

But really, in regards to the first comment, I'm sure no one would write a Bible lemon without intending it as a joke.

Back when I liked Twilight, my favorite was Pregnancy 101. Now it's only available in Español.

KirstenAnns avatar KirstenAnn Yeah You Are +6Reply

http://www.fanfiction.net/s/294...e_Consequences

this has nothing to do with sex but I think it deserves some sort of award for most awesome fanfic evar

"The contrysides were nice and the plants were singing and the birds and the sun was almost down from the top of the sky"

gold

Anonymous +5Reply
@http://www.fanfiction.net/s/294...e_Consequences this has nothing to do with sex but I think...

"Ravenholdm was nothing like the countrysides there was no birds singing and the pants were dead"

Oh god, this is amazing.

GryndStones avatar GryndStone Yeah You Are +1Reply

So my friend is a brony. And looks up fanfiction when the shows not on. So his life is pitiful and filled with pony sex

Jonesys avatar Jonesy Yeah You Are +4Reply
@DoctorWhat Do you mean his life is pitiful because he's a brony, or because he clops?

Well clopping alone kind of does it but im no brony so they both kind of sadden me

Jonesys avatar Jonesy Yeah You Are +1Reply
@Jonesy Well clopping alone kind of does it but im no brony so they both kind of sadden me

I'm a brony, and I don't look down on cloppers, it's just not my thing. And you're entitled to your opinion as well about bronies as a whole.
But with the supernatural powers and numerous
Instances of ponies going insane, pony fanfic gets PRETTY weird.

Dramione.
Draco & Hermione.
BEST FANFICTION EVER. Isolation by Bex-Chan. and Hunted by Bex-Chan. both are sooo amazing.

adriana_heathers avatar adriana_heather Yeah You Are +3Reply

Everything is better with sex. True story.

Riniels avatar Riniel Yeah You Are +3Reply

Jeez, I've been such a comment whore today....

Ebony_Ways avatar Ebony_Way Yeah You Are +3Reply
This user has deactivated their account.
@1613470

Is that new?

Brettward95s avatar Brettward95 Yeah You Are +4Reply
This user has deactivated their account.
@1614172

Fantastic.

Brettward95s avatar Brettward95 Yeah You Are +1Reply

i've written some drarry (draco harry) with implied sex and an established relationship. i've also started writing a godric gryffindor and helga's cloak pairing fic with a friend. we never finished it, but it was a fun crack pairing.

Anonymous +2Reply

http://www.cracked.com/article_...anfiction.html

The 5 Most Baffling Sex-Scenes in the History of FanFiction - according to cracked.com :P ^.^

KatOwnsYourSouls avatar KatOwnsYourSoul Yeah You Are +2Reply

I do like Glee fan fiction. Especially if it's Sam + Finn :$

Anonymous +1Reply

4 words for any Sherlock fans. Flowers in a Box.
Best trollfic, though you have to get to the end.

Watching
Wtaching
WHCATNG

ForeverDays avatar ForeverDay Yeah You Are +1Reply

http://marigoldfarmer.tumblr.co...-space-wizards
This one's a joke, but for me it perfectly sums up the majority of fanfic.

ctiscoolers avatar ctiscooler Yeah You Are 0Reply

It gets really wired when people start shipping America/England yaoi

Ones I agree in:

1) Cloud and Aerith should have ended up together
2) Aerith and Zack should have lived and end up together
3) Axel should not have died
4) Roxas and Axel sooooo wanted each other

IAMSTORMs avatar IAMSTORM Yeah You Are -1Reply

I've been on an Elder scrolls trip lately.
I felt bad for poor Cicero, so I'm writing a little fanfiction so he gets an equally dorky and disturbed companion.
Fanfictions can be pretty good, however the use of manlove and boylove scars me.. like the idea of Roxas and Axel and Reno and Rude. Or Reno and Axel.. its just.. ew. I usually steer clear of any M\..
And Mpreg.. dear god.. -shudders-

Best harry potter pairing: Giant Squid/Toast. I'm not kidding.

Anonymous -1Reply

Fan fictions get a bad rep for all being poorly written smut.
A lot of the ones I've read were professional level writing with great stories.
Though yes, most were smut.
It's a habit.

Anonymous -2Reply
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