Gambiteer Jokes & Humour
The voters have decided that Gambiteer is right! Vote on the post to say if you agree or disagree.
Also about Jokes & Humour+115Since same-sex marriage is legal, and although polygamy isn't legal, multiple women married together with no husband should not be illegal or any sexist betrayal, since neither is of the opposite sex. And it shouldn't be considered a violation of the tradition, since same-sex marriage is itself a violation of the tradition, amirite?
Also about Jokes & Humour+3Russell Peters’s Chinese accent is on point, amirite?
Also by Gambiteer+185It's disappointing when you hear some people talking about how they were going to get together later and do stuff like "blow, "finger," and "pull out," but when you excitedly ask them where they will be hosting the orgy, they look at you weirdly before informing you that they were talking about band class, amirite?
Also by Gambiteer+26Many of the arguments on this site follow the same format. For example, somebody will comment on a post with something like, "I fervently disagree with your post, therefore you are stupid." And the OP will reply, "Your spelling and grammar was not perfect, therefore your opinion is invalid." And so on, with both people making different points on why their opponent is wrong, instead of why they're right, amirite?
Also by Gambiteer+297If you were the guy to start the races in the Olympics, it would be funny to hold the gun that when fired begins the race in the air, and just wait. Test their composure a little. And when finally they do start confusedly looking around, fire the gun. It would be pretty mean but I guarantee that some patient Indian guy who otherwise would have no chance would be very thankful, amirite?
is there a sparknotes version of this potd?
Context: This POTD references the "deathbed" scene in many movies in which a father is dying and he is attended by his grieving son. Historically, the father says "Son, I'm so proud of you." Movies that include such a scene are La Grand Illusion, Tombstone, Silent Light, Ordet, The Hunt for Red October, and Cries and Whispers.
Plot Overview: OP is frustrated with the idea that this classic deathbed scene is unrealistic. He makes the argument that not all fathers are nice enough to console their son, and not all sons are successful enough to warrant pride. For example, the father might be an abusive alcoholic and the son might be a burger flipper at McDonald's. In order to be more realistic and entertaining, OP thinks that the father should say "Son, I probably should've worn a condom." The father would then be implying that he should have used a contraceptive to prevent his son from ever being born. This might have saved him whatever humiliation or stress the son caused him. And having a son who is a burger flipper at McDonald's would be embarrassing indeed.
Character List: The father: he is on his deathbed. He has the potential of being nice or not nice. The son: he is at the s...
ide of his father. He has the potential of being successful or unsuccessful. The OP: a frustrated citizen. He is unsatisfied with the lack of realism in Hollywood and wants reform. He uses humor to convince people to agree.
Themes, motifs, and symbols: "blah blah blah": signifies more praise the father gives to his son. Nobody really cares exactly what that praise might be, so OP uses a series of blahs instead. Realism: OP alludes to the fact that fathers and sons come in all different shapes and sizes. They can be not so nice, nice, successful, and unsuccessful. The fact that movies only portray fathers as nice and sons as successful is not realistic. Humor: OP's use of the blahs injects sass into the post, making amiriters laugh. The witty line "Son, I shouldv'e used a condom" challenges the reader's mental processing of causation, and when the reader finally reaches that "ahha" moment, they laugh.
Important Quotations Explained: "Son, I'm so proud of you" literally means that the father is proud of his son, perhaps for finding the cure to cancer or inventing sliced bread. "Son, I probably should've used a condom" means that the father regrets conceiving his son, and wishes he
had used a condom to prevent the conception.
Study questions and essay topics: 1. Discuss OP's use of humor as a persuasive appeal. Is it effective? How did it affect his score? 2. Would OP's suggestion make for a successful movie? What audiences would be entertained? What audiences wouldn't? 3. Why do you think fathers make such meaningful confessions on their deathbeds? How does it affect the son? 4. How does a father's personality affect his relationship with his son? How can having a son affect a father's personality? 5. Under what circumstances is it okay for a father to regret conceiving his son? Is it even possible for a father to genuinely feel this way about his son? 6. How does the realistic-ness of a movie impact audience response? Are there any movies that aren't realistic that have been successful?
Quiz: 1. Who is on their deathbed? a) mother b) father c) son d) daughter 2. Why is OP frustrated? a) He ran out of toothpaste b) he wants movies to be more realistic c) he loves Anthony, but his sentiment is unrequited d) he sucks at checkers 3. What does OP suggest about fathers? a) they're not always nice b) they're all asian c) they have nipples d) they all have illegit
imate children 4. What does the father regret? a) asking his wife for a pastrami sandwich instead of a meatball sandwich b) burping in public c) sending his only son to Earth to die for our sins d) conceiving his son 5. What does OP admit about the original version of the scene? a) it stars Brad Pitt b) it has a good balance of back-lighting and shadow c) it is good for sentimental value d) it made him ejaculate
Suggestions for further reading: http://amirite.net/147407, http://amirite.net/252536, http://amirite.net/285905, http://amirite.net/295651
How to cite this Sparknote: Favvkes. “SparkNote on POTD.” Amirite.net. SparkNotes LLC. 2012. Web. Date Accessed.
I expected this to end with "Son,I am disappoint."
Wait... that isn't Simon Cowell?!
I go to the movies to be entertained. It should be more like:
"Son.... I slept with your girlfriend last night. Also, I am not really dying. Now take this golden idol and meet me at the bottom of Mount Rushmore in three days." And then he jumps out of the window and the hospital explodes.
Sequel comes out five years later but isnt as good as the first one and makes a lot of people angry.
Don't worry though. Cause then there's fan fiction writers who write about the dad and son having sex.
Wait...if you're in the hospital, wouldn't you be killed in the explosion? That would kind of put a damper on the sequel...
I said it wasnt as good...
In a bizarre plot twist, the son gets revived by Russian scientists to exact revenge on his father. It's really quite thrilling.
"Son, I'm proud of you."
"...I'm your daughter"
"I have a daughter?"
It could be so bad the son is murdering his father...
My mom was pregnant when my parents got married.. makes me wonder sometimes.
Just ask your grandfather! I'm sure he'll remember the time he made your dad get married at gunpoint
Like my dad is even that witty.
Son, I wish you hadn't disappointed me and broken my heart by making bad decisions just like I was disappointed when that condom broke.
In inception the dad said on his deathbed something about being disspaointed.
reminds me of
Death is a sin.
Looking as good as I do is a sin, but God lets me get away with it.
Cuz I'm a Boss.
Sure you are, but you're an average one at best.
Only until Kevin Boss retires, then I'll be awesome again.
Wow, if I wasn't a football fan my username might have turned out to be anamazingBoss or something like that.
Conclusion: Football players are jerks who ruin usernames.
Death is a cosine.
this is genius
CONSIDER THE FOLLOWING
1. It's the only one of this sort in my collection, I'm not going to look for another one.
2. It has the same meaning.
Tell that to the Nye fans
Well the comment is publicly visible, so they should be able to read it. I suppose I've already told them.
Let's not fight (cry2)
I wasn't fighting, I LOVE EVERYONE
He really does love everyone.
That's not stolen from ten different websites at all.
Anthony's goal in life must be to prove us wrong when we say he couldn't possibly choose a stupider post to be POTD
I was clearly being sarcastic...this is a dumb post though