+376 I don't understand why people think that having a gay child means that you have failed as a parent. Disowning your child means you failed as a parent. amirite?

by Anonymous 11 years ago

Disowning a child doesn't mean you've failed as a parent, not all kids are fucked up because of their parents.

by Anonymous 11 years ago

I think they mean disowning your child because they're gay.

by Anonymous 11 years ago

Correct :)

by Anonymous 11 years ago

Okay, but again disowning your child doesn't make you a failure as a parent.

by Anonymous 11 years ago

Okay, but again OP means disowning your child because they're gay.

by Anonymous 11 years ago

Thank you! :)

by Anonymous 11 years ago

I'm fully aware. I still disagree that would make somebody a failure as a parent.

by Anonymous 11 years ago

So disowning someone because of something that they have no control over is totally fine?

by Anonymous 11 years ago

I don't see how you equate not making somebody a failure of a parent with being totally fine. If they don't feel they can raise the child with the love and guidance he or she needs because of the child's sexuality, I think disowning them and giving them up for adoption is a better choice.

by Anonymous 11 years ago

So you're saying that if you had a child who was gay, and you couldn't give him/her the love and guidance he or she needs, you would disown or give that said child up for adoption? I'm sorry to say, but its people like you who I worry about. Have a good day :)

by Anonymous 11 years ago

No, because I personally am not homophobic. Doesn't mean you need to discriminate against people who are doing what they feel is best.

by Anonymous 11 years ago

*facepalm* I never said you was now did I sir?

by Anonymous 11 years ago

"So you're saying that if you had a child who was gay, and you couldn't give him/her the love and guidance he or she needs, you would disown or give that said child up for adoption?" This implies I am a homophobe, because you're singling out the child being gay as a reason I would not feel capable of raising a child, when that would have no effect, If I had a child, and felt I personally could not raise said child for whatever reason, I would give that child up for adoption, yes, regardless of whether or not they were gay, because it would give them a better childhood as well as a better future. On the other hand, if I thought I was fit to raise a child, I would raise them myself regardless of sexuality. I'm just being logical when I say that if a parent is homophobic, it's better for them to let a couple that is more tolerant raise their child as opposed to raising them is a household where they would be possibly mistreated.

by Anonymous 11 years ago

It would take a while for the parents to find out their kid is gay so it would probably feel terrible for them to be disowned after getting used to their parents. Not many people would want to adopt a teenager (assuming that's when they come out) so it's doubtful they're going to go to a great new home. All because the parents hate the kid for something they're born with.

by Anonymous 11 years ago

Yes, that's definitely true. I suppose what I meant was that leaving the kid alone was better than showing him them that they hated him constantly. Obviously the ideal situation would be acceptance but that isn't realistic in many situations.

by Anonymous 11 years ago

Yeah that makes sense. I see your point and kind of agree, but I still don't think disowning your child for something like this makes sense

by Anonymous 11 years ago

Disowning your child, regardless of his or her conditions is like God or our Creator disowning you! We have more faults in heart than a gay child, remember, we are all children to our Creator. What faults do you have, aside of not being gay?

by Anonymous 11 years ago

I was being hypothetical, goodness Now once again, have a good day :)

by Anonymous 11 years ago

Yes, hypothetically I would rather be raised by tolerant parents who had adopted me knowing I was gay than by homophobic parents who didn't disown me because they didn't want to be failures as parents. I don't understand why anybody would prefer the latter. You haven't responded to any points I've made in any real sense, you've just downvoted me and implied I was homophobic arbitrarily.

by Anonymous 11 years ago

Disowning is not the same as giving someone up for adoption. It happens later in life, after the child is already grown up. In my opinion, disowning is equivalent to admitting that you are so ashamed of your child that you can't even bear to be associated with them at all.

by Anonymous 11 years ago

Hahahaha... ridiculous. Disowning your child DOES make you a bad parent. Having the wherewithal to KNOW you are a bad parent, doesn't make you a good one, in any circumstance, it just makes you a realist.

by Anonymous 11 years ago