+159 Fortune cookies are all way too positive. Where are the fortunes that say "you'll die alone with six cats," or "put that cookie down, fattie. You're clogging your arteries", amirite?

by Anonymous 11 years ago

One time my mom got one that said "be happy with what you have; not everyone can be a winner."

by Anonymous 11 years ago

I've never had one xD

by Anonymous 11 years ago

The second one isn't a fortune.

by Anonymous 11 years ago

Most aren't, which it stupid.

by Anonymous 11 years ago

I went to a Chinese Buffet and got a fortune cookie that said "You should exercise more often" Thanks fortune cookie. Thanks so much.

by Anonymous 11 years ago

I was out at a restaurant with my boyfriend when I got a fortune cookie that said "you and your wife will be very happy together" I didn't even want to show it to my boyfriend

by Anonymous 11 years ago

I shit you not, I once got a fortune cookie that said "Don't do drugs." Thanks fortune cookie.

by Anonymous 11 years ago