My parents knew each other for 1 month, dated for 2 weeks, and have been married for 20 years. You just never know when two people are meant to be together. So society should just shut it when it comes to setting rules on how long two people should wait before getting married. Let the two partners figure it out for themselves. amirite?
I agree. It depends on the people.
My parents aren't the best examples of this though. They knew each other 6 months, got married, had a couple of kids, mom tried to cut off my dad's penis then cheated on him, they got divorced and now only experience pure, unadultered hate for each other.
Yeah... the penis thing happened a couple years before I was born. My mom had great tits so that was probably what kept them together.
She didn't come at him, he woke up after they a giant fight and she was holding his dick, crying her fucking eyes out and holding a butcher knife to it.
I don't know about that. If we always let two people decide for themselves when they're ready to get married, there would be a lot more failed marriages. One of my friends (who is a girl) would have been married 3 or 4 times by now if she was allowed to marry every guy she wanted to.
Completely agree. It's the same with age. Some people think you can only experience true love when you're over 18, or over 20 or whatever else. It's different for every person/couple. As I say on every post about it, I know a couple in their 30s who are happily married with kids and have been together since they were 12. My parents met when my mom was 19 and my dad was 31. They got married the next year. Thursday will be their 25th anniversary.
Just because they were "meant to be" (god, that term is stupid) doesn't mean that their decision was absolutely retarded. They got lucky and you're basically telling people to just follow their luck. Good luck getting 3 divorces, Christ.
You don't know enough about a person in that amount of time.
Meant to be, want to be, decided to be, ... together (etc.). I think that it's their decision in the long run. It's completely irritating when society thinks they have a strong enough voice to control when two people can be married and whatnot. If you feel that you need to date someone longer, then go for it. I'm not telling anyone to follow the "luck" of my parents. My entire post is about how society shouldn't have any say in when two partners can get married.
Wow who even said anything about society controlling them? This is simple logic. And you know, sometimes SoCiEtY isn't wrong. Murder is bad, but you know what? I'm so fucking quirky and unique I think I'll go kill someone tonight FUQ SOCIETYS RULES!!11
The reason you should wait it out is because you get to know them more in that time period. Your parents were stupid for making that decision to get married so early. Just because someone safely got across the trapeze line doesn't mean the next 100 people will, and just because you took 30 unprescribed pain pills everyday for 10 years doesn't mean the next day you take them will be absolutely fine. If your child walks off a fucking cliff and lives, you still ground them because they were stupid for doing so.
You're entitled to your own opinion, obviously. I don't agree anyways. This is where it gets complicated. Either you live as an independent person, complying to the needs of your own self or you washout to the standards of society.
Cause you didn't actually have a single point to begin with. I'm suprised people waste their time arguing with you. You're an idiot that feels that he knows more than other people. Its an entertaining read at least.
My parents were lucky only because they decided to follow their hearts, not what society told them to do. So I'm pretty damn happy they got lucky or I wouldn't be here today. So either your telling me that I shouldn't be alive or that society should tell us what's right/wrong with our own personal matters. Some parts of society hate gay marriage... so there shouldn't be gay marriage? Some love it, so there should be. However, I think what SOCIETY wants is completely pointless because it's about what the two people want for themselves. Don't be all "MURDER!" I'm simply talking about relationships and love right now.
I mostly agree with TailsTurrosaki. It's not that you shouldn't be around today, or that your parents shouldn't have gotten married, it's just that they should have waited to see if it was really the best match. Still gotten married, since they loved each other, but made sure it was the right decision. This way people who didn't get lucky would have less emotional and actual problems (ex. divorce) when parting from someone.
Times are also very different today. From my knowledge, I imagine that it was a very different world when your parents got married. Divorces used to be much more ground upon, and in some cases were even much more difficult to get. Because of this, when people got married, it was considered forever, not just "as long as we are happy". If their relation began to suck, too bad. They would have to make it work and find love for each other. I think this may be the situation in arranged marriages. You know you can't get divorced and you have to live with them for a very long time, so you have to love them if you want to enjoy life. You find common ground, and eventually love.
It's not always possible, but I think it accounts for a few situations.
Also, it's society who has to deal with the aftermath of people getting married to early. I don't think society in general should have a say, but common sense and close family/friends should. Friends and family are the ones who have to deal with the literal cost and the emotional damage that waiting 6 months or living together before hand could have averted.
A teenager shouldn't get married, sure it could work out, but they might also find out that they were going to meet someone even better at their first job. Or they grow up a bit and change after their first real job after university. Who knows?
I think if two people are going to bee together forever, why hurry into it? They have their whole lives! 6 months won't ruin the relationship if they should get married.
Though I do think that marriage will force people to deal with problems, when other times they may have simple ended the relationship.
The post said nothing about recommending early marriage. OP was simply saying the couple themselves are the ones who know their relationship better than anyone else, so they should decide their lives -- whether to marry early or late or not at all. Marriage decisions rely on the couple themselves, with an exception maybe of their children, because it's their life. It's smart to listen to those wiser than you, but if they choose do what they feel is right, they shouldn't be automatically called idiots. No one knows a relationship better than the ones in it.
Anon I actually saw the change over in your argument from 'Im right and I'll hold to that' to 'Oh crap I've got no logical leg to stand on, better start insulting him.' Also fun fact, while most people know that the divorce rate in first world countries is 50% very few know that the divorce rate for people who got married in under 3 years is 85% and the divorce rate for people who got married after being 3 or more years together varies between 12 and 18 % depending on the country. That's because at 3 years people fall out of the honeymoon faze where seratonin and dopamine (pleasure chemicals) were controlling their infatuation, after that point you're either left with someone you trust, enjoy, and want to be with forever; or the 'love' quickly dries up and the relationship falls apart. So good for your parents, glad theyre happy. But it was an idiotic decision and your parents decision shouldn't be embraced or recommended simply because they won the relationship lottery on the first try.
I give up. Have a bunch of divorces and think you're all special because U DONT FOLLO SOCIETY'S DUM ROOLZ IM A FREEEE BIRD <3333 :)))), I don't care. You didn't even acknowledge my other points.
Society does have a strong enough voice, believe it or not. That doesn't always make it right, of course.
If they do get married in that amount of time, I'll continuously call them stupid and watch the high chance of their marriage failing and say, "I told you so." People should hold the fuck on before making such big decisions.
Hey, it's a lucky win of course for your parents. Other people aren't always that lucky. It doesn't have anything to do with society, you should honestly try to wait it out at least 6 months, and then make your decision. Weddings are expensive.
My parents had their marriage arranged for them before they were even teenagers (although they didn't get married until their early or mid twenties) and they've been happily married for 30+ years
Why would you even get married after 2 weeks? I know it works for some people, but if you really want to be together for the rest of your life, why not wait a few months? I guess it's a personal choice, but I just don't understand it.
2 weeks is rly a short time. Either your parents got really lucky, or worked it out when they got problems because they were married...2 weeks, really?
My friend sold all his worldly possessions and went around burning down buildings, and it later turned out that all his possessions were possessed by evil demons and the buildings were owned by serial killers. So fuck society, trying to tell people that selling everything you own and burning down buildings is a stupid decisions when it MIGHT NOT BE, OKAY?!
It's all circumstantial. There are a lucky few, my friends are one of them, but I find that people in that situation usually have other factors involved.
Of course it's up to each couple as long as they're over 18, but I still think it's not a good idea. Yes, there are exceptions, but I think it's best that a couple is together for a good amount of time before they decide to get married. It's not like putting off marriage is going to have any negative effects on the couple, but rushing into it definitely can, so why not just give it some time? If one of my friends or relatives was going to marry someone after only being together a short amount of time, I would definitely advise them against it.
I think that as society changes, it's fixing itself. If you think about how old our parents were when they got married, at least in my family, no one was under 25. Nowadays, people are waiting much longer to marry- I know some people just getting married now and they're in their mid thirties. If this is only about the divorce rate, then maybe they were too young to make sure they found the one
I agree. It depends on the people.
My parents aren't the best examples of this though. They knew each other 6 months, got married, had a couple of kids, mom tried to cut off my dad's penis then cheated on him, they got divorced and now only experience pure, unadultered hate for each other.
she tried cutting off his penis?
O_O
Omg...if you could have seen my face when i read your first comment...
Wait, your mom tried to cut off you dad's penis THEN cheated on him? He still wanted to be in a relationship after she tried to cut off his penis?
Yeah, with a butcher knife... My mother has issues.
Your dad must have shat his pants when she came at him with the butcher knife.
uh did your mom see a psychiatrist D:
Yeah... the penis thing happened a couple years before I was born. My mom had great tits so that was probably what kept them together.
She didn't come at him, he woke up after they a giant fight and she was holding his dick, crying her fucking eyes out and holding a butcher knife to it.
Actually we tried. She met with my therapist who strongly suggested she get a psych evaluation... she refused.
Ok, so your dad probably shat his pants when he woke up.
I don't know about that. If we always let two people decide for themselves when they're ready to get married, there would be a lot more failed marriages. One of my friends (who is a girl) would have been married 3 or 4 times by now if she was allowed to marry every guy she wanted to.
If she's over 18 then she is allowed to marry any guy she wants to though
She isn't.
Completely agree. It's the same with age. Some people think you can only experience true love when you're over 18, or over 20 or whatever else. It's different for every person/couple. As I say on every post about it, I know a couple in their 30s who are happily married with kids and have been together since they were 12. My parents met when my mom was 19 and my dad was 31. They got married the next year. Thursday will be their 25th anniversary.
Ugh, how dare you present exceptions.
Just because they were "meant to be" (god, that term is stupid) doesn't mean that their decision was absolutely retarded. They got lucky and you're basically telling people to just follow their luck. Good luck getting 3 divorces, Christ.
You don't know enough about a person in that amount of time.
Meant to be, want to be, decided to be, ... together (etc.). I think that it's their decision in the long run. It's completely irritating when society thinks they have a strong enough voice to control when two people can be married and whatnot. If you feel that you need to date someone longer, then go for it. I'm not telling anyone to follow the "luck" of my parents. My entire post is about how society shouldn't have any say in when two partners can get married.
Wow who even said anything about society controlling them? This is simple logic. And you know, sometimes SoCiEtY isn't wrong. Murder is bad, but you know what? I'm so fucking quirky and unique I think I'll go kill someone tonight FUQ SOCIETYS RULES!!11
The reason you should wait it out is because you get to know them more in that time period. Your parents were stupid for making that decision to get married so early. Just because someone safely got across the trapeze line doesn't mean the next 100 people will, and just because you took 30 unprescribed pain pills everyday for 10 years doesn't mean the next day you take them will be absolutely fine. If your child walks off a fucking cliff and lives, you still ground them because they were stupid for doing so.
Your parents are lucky, they are not right.
You're entitled to your own opinion, obviously. I don't agree anyways. This is where it gets complicated. Either you live as an independent person, complying to the needs of your own self or you washout to the standards of society.
Cause you didn't actually have a single point to begin with. I'm suprised people waste their time arguing with you. You're an idiot that feels that he knows more than other people. Its an entertaining read at least.
My parents were lucky only because they decided to follow their hearts, not what society told them to do. So I'm pretty damn happy they got lucky or I wouldn't be here today. So either your telling me that I shouldn't be alive or that society should tell us what's right/wrong with our own personal matters. Some parts of society hate gay marriage... so there shouldn't be gay marriage? Some love it, so there should be. However, I think what SOCIETY wants is completely pointless because it's about what the two people want for themselves. Don't be all "MURDER!" I'm simply talking about relationships and love right now.
I mostly agree with TailsTurrosaki. It's not that you shouldn't be around today, or that your parents shouldn't have gotten married, it's just that they should have waited to see if it was really the best match. Still gotten married, since they loved each other, but made sure it was the right decision. This way people who didn't get lucky would have less emotional and actual problems (ex. divorce) when parting from someone.
Times are also very different today. From my knowledge, I imagine that it was a very different world when your parents got married. Divorces used to be much more ground upon, and in some cases were even much more difficult to get. Because of this, when people got married, it was considered forever, not just "as long as we are happy". If their relation began to suck, too bad. They would have to make it work and find love for each other. I think this may be the situation in arranged marriages. You know you can't get divorced and you have to live with them for a very long time, so you have to love them if you want to enjoy life. You find common ground, and eventually love.
It's not always possible, but I think it accounts for a few situations.
Also, it's society who has to deal with the aftermath of people getting married to early. I don't think society in general should have a say, but common sense and close family/friends should. Friends and family are the ones who have to deal with the literal cost and the emotional damage that waiting 6 months or living together before hand could have averted.
A teenager shouldn't get married, sure it could work out, but they might also find out that they were going to meet someone even better at their first job. Or they grow up a bit and change after their first real job after university. Who knows?
I think if two people are going to bee together forever, why hurry into it? They have their whole lives! 6 months won't ruin the relationship if they should get married.
Though I do think that marriage will force people to deal with problems, when other times they may have simple ended the relationship.
The post said nothing about recommending early marriage. OP was simply saying the couple themselves are the ones who know their relationship better than anyone else, so they should decide their lives -- whether to marry early or late or not at all. Marriage decisions rely on the couple themselves, with an exception maybe of their children, because it's their life. It's smart to listen to those wiser than you, but if they choose do what they feel is right, they shouldn't be automatically called idiots. No one knows a relationship better than the ones in it.
Anon I actually saw the change over in your argument from 'Im right and I'll hold to that' to 'Oh crap I've got no logical leg to stand on, better start insulting him.' Also fun fact, while most people know that the divorce rate in first world countries is 50% very few know that the divorce rate for people who got married in under 3 years is 85% and the divorce rate for people who got married after being 3 or more years together varies between 12 and 18 % depending on the country. That's because at 3 years people fall out of the honeymoon faze where seratonin and dopamine (pleasure chemicals) were controlling their infatuation, after that point you're either left with someone you trust, enjoy, and want to be with forever; or the 'love' quickly dries up and the relationship falls apart. So good for your parents, glad theyre happy. But it was an idiotic decision and your parents decision shouldn't be embraced or recommended simply because they won the relationship lottery on the first try.
I would like to point out that I wasn't the Mr. Cupid anon. Way to make a dumb assuumption, Soap.
I give up. Have a bunch of divorces and think you're all special because U DONT FOLLO SOCIETY'S DUM ROOLZ IM A FREEEE BIRD <3333 :)))), I don't care. You didn't even acknowledge my other points.
All of that said nothing other than "u suck", so basically you're "trolling". I hate that word.
But good for you for trying.
Society does have a strong enough voice, believe it or not. That doesn't always make it right, of course.
If they do get married in that amount of time, I'll continuously call them stupid and watch the high chance of their marriage failing and say, "I told you so." People should hold the fuck on before making such big decisions.
My grandparents dated for 3 weeks, got married, had three children, and have been married for 56 years.
Wuv! Twu wuv!
http://ctrlv.in/105811
Hey, it's a lucky win of course for your parents. Other people aren't always that lucky. It doesn't have anything to do with society, you should honestly try to wait it out at least 6 months, and then make your decision. Weddings are expensive.
My parents had their marriage arranged for them before they were even teenagers (although they didn't get married until their early or mid twenties) and they've been happily married for 30+ years
Why would you even get married after 2 weeks? I know it works for some people, but if you really want to be together for the rest of your life, why not wait a few months? I guess it's a personal choice, but I just don't understand it.
what a way to pop the question
2 weeks is rly a short time. Either your parents got really lucky, or worked it out when they got problems because they were married...2 weeks, really?
My parents had liked each other since they were 13 they're the happiest and cutest couple I've ever known.
My friend sold all his worldly possessions and went around burning down buildings, and it later turned out that all his possessions were possessed by evil demons and the buildings were owned by serial killers. So fuck society, trying to tell people that selling everything you own and burning down buildings is a stupid decisions when it MIGHT NOT BE, OKAY?!
It's all circumstantial. There are a lucky few, my friends are one of them, but I find that people in that situation usually have other factors involved.
Of course it's up to each couple as long as they're over 18, but I still think it's not a good idea. Yes, there are exceptions, but I think it's best that a couple is together for a good amount of time before they decide to get married. It's not like putting off marriage is going to have any negative effects on the couple, but rushing into it definitely can, so why not just give it some time? If one of my friends or relatives was going to marry someone after only being together a short amount of time, I would definitely advise them against it.
I think that as society changes, it's fixing itself. If you think about how old our parents were when they got married, at least in my family, no one was under 25. Nowadays, people are waiting much longer to marry- I know some people just getting married now and they're in their mid thirties. If this is only about the divorce rate, then maybe they were too young to make sure they found the one