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It's irritating when people say things like "I don't mean to be sexist, but -insert sexist comment here-," amirite?

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it's like the whole "no offense" thing all over

fuzalas avatar fuzala Yeah You Are +5Reply

But what if it is something that is true, but some may find sexist?

@Mike_Hawk But what if it is something that is true, but some may find sexist?

you got any examples?

it's like saying "no offense but..."

what he/she says after may not be offensive
but adding the no offense can gear up the listener to think differently

I explained it better here: http://amirite.com/748537-a-nor...-to-it-amirite

if the person just makes their statement
then, in some cases, it's less likely to sound negative

fuzalas avatar fuzala Yeah You Are 0Reply
@fuzala you got any examples? it's like saying "no offense but..." what he/she says after may not be offensive but...

On average, women are physically weaker than men and don't get along with each other as well as men do. Women also tend to be smarter than men and are often better caregivers.

These are facts, not something I am making up to be sexist. I find that adding "not to be sexist" may be necessary, because some people are offended by virtually everything.

Adding to what I just said, it can also be used with observations that my not be facts as the first lines are. For example, I find women are the only ones to get offended by anything, and are very easily offended. I'm not saying that to be sexist, that's just my observation. However, I wouldn't really want to say it without prefacing it with a statement saying that I'm not sexist. People will jump to conclusions very quickly with very little evidence.

@Mike_Hawk On average, women are physically weaker than men and don't get along with each other as well as men do. Women also...

I feel that adding "not to be sexist" doesn't help but can sometimes make things worse

if people found a statement to be offensive
adding a phrase like "not to be offensive" doesn't seem like it'll change their mind about taking offense

It may actually make them think the speaker is being contradictory or even passive-aggressive

of course, I'll acknowledge that there are probably exceptions to what I'm saying

with observations
each individual has varying experiences and biases that influence their observations

it's pretty normal to form certain schemas
but people will still take offense to our schemas even if we don't mean them negatively and even if we're just stating something that we observed

we usually don't add disclaimers to say that what we're stating is true in our observations and not necessarily for the general population

fuzalas avatar fuzala Yeah You Are -1Reply

This can totally apply to racist comments too.

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