I've never been in that situation, and hope I never sink that low.
I honestly hope you never do either because it is something I would never wish on anyone.
You are right. I am no stranger to losing everything I love. Last year, I lost custody of my children and had to give my home to my ex (their dad). Not seeing my kids every day took a toll on me. I had days it took everything to get out of bed. I felt like everything I loved I lost. Then I realized I had to be strong because they not only needed me but my friends needed me too.
I have hit low points but I have always managed to survive and not a day goes by that I ain't thankful I did.
So sorry you've had to go through all of that, it takes a strong woman to pull herself out of a horrible situation, but you did it. Stay strong.
I mean I guess as long as you have a hobby or something... rock bottom can liberate you to chase long shot dreams but hopefully you have something to focus on other then the emptiness .otherwise you will die