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Self-Defense classes teach you to use your car keys as a weapon to defend yourself, but in the future, that information might be redundant because every day more and more car keys don't actually have keys, amirite?

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They will teach you light saber safety.

Instead, self-defense classes will teach you how to command your self-driving car to run over your assailant.

Correct....you'll command your self-driving car to run them over.

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