Going in with the mindset that you will lose or be given disappointment is a good way to cope with failure, losing, or general disappointment. amirite?

As far as I understand it, a Buddhist (which I am not) might say: "don't expect, just be", and that expecting the worst is just as unhelpful as expecting the best.

by Anonymous 2 years ago

This is an unpopular opinion? I figured that "If you expect to be disappointed, you're less likely to be disappointed." was just like...common sense.

by Anonymous 2 years ago

I suppose its common. But a lot of people say it isn't a good or healthy way to cope and i'm saying it is. To expect failure

by Anonymous 2 years ago

That's just optimistic people being mad that not everyone lives in a land of sunshine and rainbows like they do.

by Anonymous 2 years ago

More than that, optimist people seem often to adhere to a kind of practical solipsism with regard to optimism. They think everyone's mind works the same way theirs does, that being optimist is a kind of *buff* that makes everyone more likely to succeed. They literally cannot fathom an existence where the opposite may be true for some people. Optimism may make some people less likely to succeed, for any number of reasons.

by Anonymous 2 years ago

>Going in with the mindset that you will lose or be given disappointment is a good way to cope with failure, losing, or general disappointment. True, but it's a terrible way to live your life in general. Best way is to just do your best understanding you might win or lose. Be OK when you lose and enjoy the victory. Hope for the best and be prepared for the worst. Going in expecting the worst in everything is a road to depression. You really will pull shadow down on your life that way. If everything you do is gonna fail, why even try? Soon enough you've gone from dealing with failure to never winning because you're not trying in the firstplace.

by Anonymous 2 years ago

You might be less disappointed, but the mindset you start with affects the way you approach things and thus how they eventually turn out. This will more often result in these self fulfilling prophecy situations. If you just learn to deal with disappointment properly you will Profit way more from it than just being less disappointed

by Anonymous 2 years ago

Isn't this Zendaya's whole schtick in the latest Spider-Man movie? I doubt it's an unpopular take.

by Anonymous 2 years ago

If you expect nothing you won't be disappointed when you get nothing. That's just the way life is.

by Anonymous 2 years ago

Honestly I feel like this is quite unpopular! Good job! I disagree 100%. I feel like a positive or neutral mindset will set you up for better success than a negative mindset. This coming from a guy with a usually negative mindset btw. Whenever I'm feeling myself or are confident in my skills I just do better. Whenever I'm not feeling it or have a negative image of what an outcome would be it definitely affects my performance.

by Anonymous 2 years ago

I think it's a self fulfilling prophecy. We sense other people's energy and if you're sending out negative energy, you will attract negative people. It takes a lot of courage to put yourself out there and in the end that courage will be rewarded. You might learn couple of hard life lessons before that reward, but I wanna end up with a person who admires my courage and not with someone who shares my most negatives feelings.

by Anonymous 2 years ago

I've tried that and find that it just impacts my self esteem. Telling yourself you aren't likely to win, makes me less confident. My approach is ‘what happens, happens'. I'm going to try my best and see what happens. I try really hard not to swing towards optimism or pessimism. Not get my hopes up or assume the worst. ‘If I get this job, great, I'd enjoy it. If I don't get it, I'll find something else.' As long as I did all I could, I'm ok with that.

by Anonymous 2 years ago

You receive what you expect.

by Anonymous 2 years ago

This reasoning is somewhat related to Stoic philosophy, which accepts negative outcomes as a condition of life that should be expected and accepted as readily as positive outcomes.

by Anonymous 2 years ago

Spoken like Michael Jordan himself..

by Anonymous 2 years ago

I don't think it applies everywhere, but I definitely use this mindset in university. Going into exams I usually just expect a pass so I won't be too hard on myself. Applying this to all of life seems like it might make you kind of pessimistic though.

by Anonymous 2 years ago

yes!!! saves you from disappointment in the moment. i like to mentally prepare myself for the worst

by Anonymous 2 years ago

100% agree this is my mindset going into anything in life.

by Anonymous 2 years ago

No!!!!! Always strive to win! If you prepare to lose you will do just that even in success. You won't see it as a success only as a task completed. Better mindset is, don't think just do.

by Anonymous 2 years ago

AKA Pessimism   planning for the worst while hoping for the best

by Anonymous 2 years ago