Someone in the future is gonna manage to get malware on their cybernetic implant, amirite?

And then one day they'll have to be driven to a doctor by a random passerby because their cybernetic penis is malfunctioning so badly that their crotch is on fire.

by Anonymous 2 years ago

V ? That you?

by Anonymous 2 years ago

No. It's Jackie

by Anonymous 2 years ago

"Doctor, it burns when I pee. Or when I don't pee. My penis is literally on fire and I don't have an extinguisher rated for electrical fires."

by Anonymous 2 years ago

The perfect role for Jesse Cox

by Anonymous 2 years ago

I know the feeling, choom

by Anonymous 2 years ago

You'll be at work and one of your coworkers will say, "What's that noise?" And you'll reply, "Sorry, that's me. I got a sexually transmitted virus from that cyborg at the bar on Friday night and I can't turn off my dick vibrations unless I send them 8 bitcoins."

by Anonymous 2 years ago

Tbf a lot of medical ailments feel like some organ has downloaded malware.

by Anonymous 2 years ago

That is a pretty close description of how viruses work (the biological kind). And an RNA based vaccine like for covid is like a software update for the antivirus.

by Anonymous 2 years ago

Imagine having popups everywhere. Like youre at work and all of a sudden porn pops up in your vision.

by Anonymous 2 years ago

Assuming cybernetics actually end up being used, 100% peoppe will make virus for it.

by Anonymous 2 years ago

Every episode of Ghost in the Shell is about someone's cybernetic brain getting hacked by malware.

by Anonymous 2 years ago

I'll be amazed if nobody has tried to make ransomware for reprogrammable pacemakers.

by Anonymous 2 years ago

They have.

by Anonymous 2 years ago

Scarier still, it's not that hard to get access to.

by Anonymous 2 years ago

I'm happy not getting cybernetics for this very reason (among others).

by Anonymous 2 years ago

There's just nothing quite like getting popups for "Hot Single Milfs in your area" beamed directly into your eye

by Anonymous 2 years ago

Bro I just want to be able to browse telnet while laying back in my bed with my eyes closed.

by Anonymous 2 years ago

Scientists have predicted this problem for several decades now, and the videos discussing this are extremely disturbing.

by Anonymous 2 years ago

People who had experimental ocular implants from this one company had a rude awakening to the reality of cyberware: The company was bought out by a competitor, and they *turned off the eyes of those who had bought them*.

by Anonymous 2 years ago

That won't even be the worst. Those cybernetics will be pumping advertisements into your brain every ten minutes of your entire life.

by Anonymous 2 years ago

Street Samurai: "I have a cybernetic eye that vastly improves my eyesight. I got telescopic vision, infrared, recording and playback..." Hacker: "O yah? Well... *tappytappy* now you have adware. Enjoy random popups from Ernie's House Of Porn and the Jumpscare Emporium" Sam: "What the...goddamnit!" Hacker: "Just click the X in the corner to close the windows. No, with your finger."

by Anonymous 2 years ago

Malware? I imagine being admitted to a psychiatric unit becuase of the 400+ daily pharmaceutical ads just so i can open my email with my eyes closed.

by Anonymous 2 years ago

Not exactly an implant but anyone wonder why Google glases were poised to be the next big thing then suddenly gone silent?

by Anonymous 2 years ago

Catch a case of digital arthritis unless you send the five buttcoins.

by Anonymous 2 years ago

😂😂 Ransomware

by Anonymous 2 years ago

Boobies, everywhere you look, boobies everywhere… call it manware

by Anonymous 2 years ago

I'm diabetic and have occasionally wondered if someone could hack into my CGM or pump and murder me if they really wanted to

by Anonymous 2 years ago

Hey! I work in biomed cybersecurity… hopefully making it so people won't do that

by Anonymous 2 years ago

Lol well keep up the good work, so far none of my enemies have succeeded in hacking my pancreas

by Anonymous 2 years ago

i think your body already did…

by Anonymous 2 years ago

Even weirder is that someone will intentionally put malware on their cybernetic implant

by Anonymous 2 years ago

Everyone in the future is gonna get adware on their cybernetic implants.

by Anonymous 2 years ago

Yeah yeah doc, I know I shouldn't have been on that site while I was connected to my arm I know Won't happen again, I swear. Can you just wipe this thing already? The arm: *stroking the air*

by Anonymous 2 years ago

Bitminers getting paid from your brain working in the background.

by Anonymous 2 years ago

By clicking on a "you're the 999999th visitor, click here to claim your prize" virtual reality ad

by Anonymous 2 years ago

Imagine an age where your brain tumour starts talking to you... And it happens to be the digitised mind of a long dead terrorist.

by Anonymous 2 years ago

Is it true Musk himself once said he wouldn't trust Neuralink being put in his own brain? Once you're wired up, you're at the mercy of whoever can access that system, or whatever programming is already built into it. The catch 22 could be that unless you get an implant, you might not be able to keep up with people who are "upgraded". So either way you're at risk. Maybe a noninvasive personal assistant would be less dangerous.

by Anonymous 2 years ago

This has already happened. Cyber security threats on pacemakers.

by Anonymous 2 years ago

That's gonna be me trying to download pirated porn and games

by Anonymous 2 years ago

It's the plot for "Accel World" a hacked Neuro device where they share to other ppl.

by Anonymous 2 years ago

They'll just start spewing out ad spots for random companies mid conversation

by Anonymous 2 years ago

Hi Dave, i'm calling about your cybernetic arm's extended warranty?

by Anonymous 2 years ago